Dear Diary 61

To the reader: As a warning, this story involves brother-sister incest, cousin incest, lesbian incest, exhibitionism, and it has a gangbang scene and group sex scenes.

Caveats: All characters in this story are over 18 throughout the story, except for Mr. Cucumber and Mr. Carrot, who are vegetables. You do not want to see an 18 year old cucumber, anyway; trust me on that. Also, my little children are both under 5 years old, but they are not involved in any way in any scenes, sexual or otherwise; rather, their only roles are that I occasionally allude to their existence, and that they arrived as outcomes of my sexual activity. That's how all children arrive, you know.

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Dear Diary,

My ex-husband Steve gave you to me, and this is my first talk with you, so let me catch you up as to the basics of what has happened to me. I just have one request, Diary. Do not let anyone read this.

First, the background. It's simple: my older brother Bill and I had strict religious upbringings. When it comes to sex, and sex is what I want to write about Dear Diary, I bought the whole package, and my brother completely rejected it. What I mean is: No premarital sex, no birth control, no abortions. Of course, I would not need birth control, nor of course abortions, if I had no premarital sex, but nevertheless I was committed.

As a consequence of my religious beliefs, I was extremely sexually frustrated all through school, right up to my graduation from college. In college I did have a boyfriend, Steve, but happily he respected my beliefs. We did a few things: we kissed, and he used to get me naked above the waist, but that was it. I also never went below the waist with him, either. To my surprise, he was fine with that.

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I now digress. Bear with me, Dear Diary, but I need to give more background. You'll understand later.

The first two summers during college I went home to my parent's house, back in southern Indiana. My brother, who is three years older than I am, had a summer job my first summer, but he came home for the long Fourth of July weekend and the sacred family barbeque in our backyard.

We always had a couple of aunts and uncles at our July 4th BBQ, and their children too, although only two came: Zeke and Amber. Zeke was my brother's age, and Amber was my age. We grew up with our cousins, and I always enjoyed their company. After the BBQ, Amber and I went upstairs to my room to be alone and to have girl talk.

I did not know it at the time, but my brother Bill had found an old baby monitor, and he had secretly placed the transmitter in my room. He of course placed the receiver in his room, also upstairs and across the hall. He and Zeke thought it would be fun to spy on their younger sisters and their 'girl talk.'

Amber and I have always been frank. Due to how devout I am, I had never had sex beyond petting above the waist, but Amber had used her freshman year in college to explore her sexuality. Curious, I had her tell me about the first boy, Ed, who had ever seduced her, and all the details of how she lost her virginity to him. I do mean all the details: It was a classic case of Too Much Information. Clearly however, Amber wanted to tell me to the point where I felt she needed to tell me.

Amber sure as hell did not need to tell our brothers, however, who were listening in attentively from Bill's room, via the baby monitor. I am sure Zeke and Bill were enjoying violating Amber's privacy and hearing these tales. Amber told them in a salacious manner, and even though she is a sister and cousin to the two boys, they are nevertheless boys.

Had we known of their eavesdropping via the baby monitor, we would have kicked them both in the balls. But of course, I only learned this on a subsequent visit home, months later, when I found the baby monitor in my room, and the other end in Bill's room. New batteries were in each.

Amber told me, and inadvertently her brother Zeke and my brother Bill, that Ed could not get her to orgasm. This was even if he had no trouble at all filling her up with his cum every chance he got. After a month or so with him, she began to sleep around in search of an orgasm, and she finally found one with her final boyfriend Chris. He gave her a nice orgasm every time they did the deed, and that too was often indeed.

Nevertheless, she and Chris had just broken up a month earlier. Currently she is in despair of ever loving again. Recounting all her times with college men was very intimate, but we had always been like that, and Amber had clearly wanted to do so. Actually, I think she needed to do so.

Amber wanted to know about my sex life in college. There was nothing to tell. I felt bad, inadequate, and wanted to be able to say something to cheer Amber up. "Tell me then about your fantasies. I'd like that. Okay Mary?"

I can imagine Bill and Zeke must have shared a high five when Amber said that. They must have been having the time of their lives.

I did not know what to do. I had fantasies, of course, but I considered them private and intimate. But I saw I needed to share them with Amber. She needed it, and she had just shared so very much with me. She had even told me the details of how several boys had made love to her. She had told me all the details, including what it felt like to have their cocks enter her and pump inside her. When I say she told me the details, I mean she spared nothing. She spared nothing at all.

"My fantasies are shameful," I said.

"Mary, how can it be worse than my recounting to you how I slept with five different men, just in my freshman year?" Amber said. "I know that's not uncommon in college, but if I had done something like that in high school -- well, can you imagine? Can you?"

"I know, I know," I said. "But mine are worse. Not that it's a competition! I'm just ashamed of them."

"Well, now you have to tell me," Amber said. "You can't leave me hanging out here." I could just imagine Zeke and Bill nodding vigorously and smiling broadly in Bill's room.

I spoke in a voice barely above a whisper. "I have huge crushes on two different boys. They spy on me while I undress. At some point I catch one of them, and confront him, and then he seduces me and takes my virginity. While we're doing it, the other guy comes in with his sister. We end up swapping, and in that one night I do both of them. I also later give them both blowjobs, and explore lesbian sex with the girl. Sometimes I even add more to the fantasy, but you get the idea..." I let my voice trail off.

"Holy smoke, Mary!" Amber cried out. I shushed her, and she continued more quietly, "For such a proper cousin, always correct, that's a smoking hot fantasy!"

I was blushing. I said, "It's shameful. It's a shameful fantasy. But it really gets my motor running. There's something wrong with me, Amber."

We sat there for a few minutes, and then Amber, a lightbulb turning on above her head, said, "In your fantasy, do you put faces on these men, and the sister?"

I nodded, looking down at my lap in shame. I said nothing. Amber waited.

Finally, Amber said, "Who?"

I shook my head. "I'm too ashamed," I said. "I cannot speak their names. It would make it too real."

It was clear that Amber did not understand me, so she said nothing, but handed me paper and a pen. I wrote on the paper and returned it to her. I looked at my feet in shame. She read what I wrote, looked at me, said, "Holy shit!," crumpled the paper and threw it across the room. I could not tell if her face reflected shock, surprise, or horror.

I turned red and began to cry. Amber moved to sit next to me on the bed, took me in her arms, and tried to comfort me. I was muttering, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have. I'm so sorry."

Amber shut me up by gently kissing me on the mouth. Taken totally by surprise, I pulled back and looked at her. She had what I can only describe as a beatific smile. She then leaned forward and kissed me again, and this time I did not pull away. As we kissed that way, seconds stretched to minutes, minutes to five minutes, and the kisses gradually progressed to become more and more sexy to the point where we were each giving the other the sexiest kisses either of us had ever experienced.

Amber pushed me on the bed and as she continued to kiss me, her hands began to explore my blouse and bra covered breasts. I reached behind her and unhooked her bra. We silently both sat up at the same time. I looked at her; she looked at me. We both smiled. We then simultaneously stripped naked above the waist. I explored another woman's body for the first time. I'm not sure but I suspect it was Amber's first time, too.

It stopped at that point, because my mother called us down for our annual toast to the sunset. We both quickly got dressed and rushed downstairs. This was an important event, for no apparent reason, other than that our two families always did it, year after year. I don't know when it began, but probably it was before I was born.

Bill was a little slow getting downstairs. He explained he had been in the bathroom. But now I know he had gone into my room, and he had retrieved the piece of paper that Amber had crumpled and thrown across the room. He read the words on it. He read of course just what I wrote:

"Bill, Zeke, and you"

Bill crumpled the paper back up and replaced it where he found it. He stood still for a minute or two, absorbing what I, his little sister had written on the paper, smiled to himself, and then headed downstairs.

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I did secretly watch an enormous amount of porn. So, I knew what all my friends might be doing. I too wanted to do everything. Denying oneself sex and fantasizing about it makes a girl imagine truly outrageous things. Things that a girl like me would never do if she were free to do them. That is, I could be sexually happy if my religious positions were not so extreme. But they were, and there you are.

When Steve proposed to me right after my college graduation, I said, "Yes!" in a heartbeat. I could not wait until our honeymoon. I planned to have nonstop sex. Bill, Zeke, and Amber were of course at the wedding. Bill and Zeke took Steve out the night before for the traditional stag night. Amber took me out for a tiny bachelorette celebration.

Bill and Zeke took Steve out to a tittle bar they knew of outside of town in the country. Steve was not into it, so after a couple of hours and a few beers, they took him home to rest up for the big day, arriving in the morning.

Amber took me to a hotel with a bar, and we got drunk and then went up to her room to watch porn on DVDs she had bought for the occasion. Nobody knew where we were going, and nobody suspected it was a hotel! The hotel room was old fashioned and still had a DVD player, so we watched the porn DVDs on the 'big screen.'

"This is so sinful, Amber," I said.

"You enjoying it?" she asked.

"Yes, quite a bit. Is that horrible?" I asked.

"Not at all. Tomorrow night is your wedding night, for Christ's sake! We need to prepare you! Do you want to get a little more sinful?"

I nodded eagerly.

"Let's watch the DVDs naked," she said.

"Ooh, let's!" I agreed. We both undressed and sat naked in armchairs. We were having fun when there was a knock on the door. We were both naked, and masturbating gently while watching the DVDs.

Amber had ordered some munchies via room service, and she said, "Boy, that was fast." I ran to hide in the bathroom, and she threw on a robe and opened the door, and Bill and Zeke pushed past her into the room. Amber called out it's Bill and Zeke, and told me to come out.

I was worried something had happened to Steve, so I wrapped myself in a towel and rushed into the room. I quickly learned Steve was fine, and tittie bars are not to his taste. "Well, good for him," I said, my religious hypocrisy rising to the surface. As I said this, two girls were getting fucked right on the TV screen.

"How did you find us?" I asked.

Amber blushed. "I told them. I thought it would be a nice surprise if they livened things up for us. I hope that's okay," she said. Her voice was laced with guilt.

I nodded. "It's okay." I thought about being dressed in only a towel in front of Bill and Zeke. I was getting aroused.

The boys ordered a bottle of bourbon from room service, with four glasses. Zeke left briefly, returning with ice. We sat around talking and drinking, Amber in her robe and naked beneath it, and me in only my scratchy bathroom towel.

Amber and I both got drunk rather quickly. Zeke and Bill took longer. The porn movie finished, and Amber lay on the bed, saying for no apparent reason, "This is a huge bed. I guess it's king size. It's comfortable, too. You know, the bed is so big, and Mary and I are so small, we could sleep sideways on it." Then Amber and I giggled.

Zeke said, "Let's test your theory. Go ahead girls, lie sideways on it." We were having fun with our brothers, happy and giggling. The boys stood up and Amber and I plopped down sideways on the bed.

Two things happened as the booze running through our systems allowed us to lie down carelessly. First, Amber's robe opened. Second, my towel came undone. Amber's breasts were still partially covered, at least the areolas and nipples were covered, but her pussy was exposed. For me, the entire front of my body was exposed.

The men smiled lustily at us. Each of them was still dressed, but they lay down next to us, and began to kiss us and to play with our boobs. Zeke took me, and Bill took Amber. I said, "I want my brother," in the tone of voice a little child might say, "I want my mother."

The boys switched, and now Bill was feeling me up, and Zeke was enjoying exploring his sister's body, probably for the first time. Eventually Bill's hands went to the place all men want their hands to go, and Zeke's hands too found Amber's snatch.

I began to moan. So did Amber. Even though I was drunk, I was incredulous on so many fronts: (1) The first boy ever to finger me was my own brother, the man I fantasized about. (2) This was incest. (3) Amber and Zeke were having incest right next to us; is that voyeuristic incest? And (4) I was having incest on the night before my wedding??!

My worst, my most horrific realization, was that I loved it. Hoping it was just the bourbon, but knowing it was not, I think the horror of committing incest undid the horror of my infidelity the night before my marriage. Tomorrow I was to marry the most wonderful man in the world. That was tomorrow. This was tonight.

These thoughts were pushed aside as I experienced my first orgasm ever given to me by a man. I heard Amber cry out in ecstasy, too. We both lay there on the bed in post orgasmic bliss. The men removed their fingers and they rapidly undressed. I saw two hard, erect cocks in the flesh for my first time. I knew it was not Amber's first time, however.

I know you are wondering, Dear Diary: The answer is no, Amber and I did not fuck our brothers, or our cousins. We knew however that our brothers needed some relief. Amber went to my brother Bill and knelt before him. She was stark naked and so was he. She lovingly stroked his cock, looked up into his eyes smiling beguilingly, and then took the head of his cock into her prescious mouth.

I had seen lots of blowjobs by watching porn. I had never seen a girl give a man a blowjob live before, let alone my cousin giving one to my brother, and it was fascinating. But Zeke needed one, too. So I simply did exactly what Amber was doing to Bill, except it was me, and I was doing it to Zeke.

Amber swallowed Bill's cum, so I swallowed Zeke's.

When we were done, Amber texted both Steve and my Mom, explaining she was keeping me at her hotel room for the night, so I would remain out of sight of Steve until the wedding. They both wrote back thanking her for her thoughtfulness, and help in maintaining the tradition.

Amber told the boys, "You have to go. If you stay, you're going to want to fuck us both. I'm not ready for that, and it would be disgusting if Mary fucked one of you the night before her marriage."

"Why just one?" I asked feigning innocence, while running my tongue over my lower lip. "I love them both. You do too, Amber." I was giggling up a storm as I said this. I was very drunk. I lay back on the bed wantonly, my legs spread, fingering myself.

"Go boys, please," Amber said, as she pushed them towards the door.

"We're naked, Amber. Get a grip," Zeke said.

Bill said, "I'm staying." His tone brooked no argument, and he was staring at my wide open, wet pussy as he said it.

Bill's firm voice stiffened the resolve of Zeke, and he too refused to leave. Shrugging, Amber said, "Suit yourself," and she put another porn DVD on and dressed herself.

She was getting ready to leave, leaving me naked and with the two naked men, my brother and cousin, and a near empty bottle of bourbon. I said, still giggling, "Please stay, Amber. We can just say no." My words were hardly convincing, punctuated as they were with massive giggling.

Amber relented. She banished the men to the two armchairs in the room, while we ladies got the bed. Half an hour later she was naked, too, and we had our fingers in our pussies as we watched Debbie Does Dallas, a classic full-length porn movie, dating from our grandparents' time.

The men came to join us on the bed. Nobody protested. Soon their hands and mouths were enjoying our boobs, and shortly later Bill gave me cunnilingus. It was my first time, and I nearly went out of my mind. I was screaming and moaning up a storm! Zeke was eating out Amber in parallel, and while it was her first time clearly with her brother Zeke, I don't know if it was the first time a man had eaten her out, or not.

The big moment came. I was ready, but Amber said, "No way I can fuck my own brother, Zeke. Sorry. How about a blowjob?"

I can't believe I said this, but I was drunk, and so turned on I was almost delirious, and I so, so ,so wanted to lose my virginity, in order to do a good job with Steve on our wedding night. "Over here, Zeke. See anything you like? I'm not as gorgeous as your sister Amber, and I'm obviously not your sister, but hey, at least I'm your first cousin..." and I playfully humped my hips into the air. I spread my legs wide apart, my foot touching Amber's foot.

Those six words became a rallying cry among the four of us: "At least I'm your first cousin." Diary, are you a grammar Nazi? Is "I'm" one word or two? It's a contraction, after all, so maybe I should have written 'those seven words?' But does it matter? I think not.

Zeke came over, climbed on top of me, and stuck his hard cock right into me. I was excited to be having sex for the first time. He was inside me, and all I could think was 'Oh my God, I'm not a virgin anymore! At last! This is what sex is. Jesus, I love it. I missed this for much too long.'

I was wet and inviting. I cannot describe how wonderful it was to have a nice, hard cock inside me. As Zeke pumped in and out of me I grabbed his back. I kissed his chest. I raised my hips to meet his thrusts. I wrapped my short legs around him, as much as I could.

As Zeke fucked me, I heard some soft moaning right next to me. Sure enough, Bill and Amber were going at it, too. Amber looked at me, and I locked eyes with her as my brother ravished her, and her brother ravished me. It was heavenly, and I felt so secure having Amber committing the same sin alongside me.

Amber had more experience, obviously, since I had none. Since Amber was moaning, I began to moan, too. Monkey see; monkey do. In this case, two luscious 22-year-old women were in the role of the proverbial monkeys.

As I moaned, to my surprise, it seemed to inspire Zeke. His fucking actually got better. It seemed as if his cock got bigger, or harder, or something. So I moaned a lot, and I moaned loud. My loud moans inspired Amber, and she got very noisy. Nobody we knew could hear us; we were anonymous, in a hotel.