Dear Diary 68

DEAR DIARY

I shouldn't have done it, but I did. I mean, of all the things in our house that meant anything, privacy was about number one. I could try and rationalize that it was partly her fault, after all she had called me and sent me into her bedroom after her school notes; but I knew better, it was not something I should have done.

When I had finished forwarding the notes from her laptop to her phone, I had turned to leave. That was when I saw the book laying on her half made bed.

It was face down, and the name Crystal was across the cover with small star stickers around it. It looked a bit childish for a nineteen year old; and I guess that was what first drew my attention.

Once I picked it up, I knew instantly what it was; it was her journal; or more appropriately her diary. I should have put it back down on the bed, but I didn't.

When I flipped to the first page, I saw the date was four years ago; that would explain the girlish name and stars on the cover; the spangles of a fifteen year old girl.

It was a small three ring binder, which is partly why it never occurred to me it was a diary; my first thought was it was something for school. Oh I had heard of diaries, you know those special hidden places girls write all their loves and pains. Crystal's bordered on almost obsessive.

There were small clear jacket inserts where she had inserted her school picture each year. It was a shock to flip through the years and watch her grow up in my hands.

I found a flower petal she had saved from her prom corsage; and even a badly written love note from some ten year old boy in her class. I think the thought that this was Crystal's nineteen years of life encapsulated into a book fascinated me.

I laughed at her comments about boys as a young girl; I smiled as she proudly spoke of her soccer and basketball victories as a teenager. I almost cried at her pain as she watched the cancer take her grandmother and how at sixteen that had motivated her towards nursing school.

I admit, her entry about losing her virginity at seventeen didn't thrill me; but I had a morbid joy when she wrote that it wasn't everything she had imagined.

I flipped it back to today's entry and was about to set it back on the bed when one of the paragraphs caught my attention.

'I saw it again today, God's its huge. I still don't know how a woman would fit that thing inside her. He didn't stroke it this time, I wish he had; I love watching him cum.'

I felt anger, and yes jealousy, rise in my throat like bile. Who the hell was showing my little girl his cock; I mean when you read that you KNOW what she is talking about.

She had mentioned she had seen it again; that meant she had seen it before today's entry. I started flipping back on the entries, trying to speed read. I found the entry; it was about six months just before school had released.

Like I said; I shouldn't have picked that book up, and I definitely should not have been reading her diary. I knew it the moment I read her entry.

'March 16th'

'I saw it. I mean I REALLY saw it. I had forgotten my hair tie and figured I would just slip in the bathroom while he showered. God it's HUGE. Tommy was nowhere near that big.'

Tommy, who the hell was Tommy, and then it, hit me, Tommy had been a boy Crystal had dated last spring. He had seemed like a nice enough kid, but Crystal had broken it off for one reason or another during the summer.

I flipped through the pages again, and found her next entry.

'April 10th'

'I snuck in the bathroom; I had to see it again. God he was stroking it this time; I thought I was going to pee myself. Watched him cum, it was awesome. He has a huge load, not like Tommy's little dribble.'

Two more entries later and it began to dawn on my slow brain, exactly who it was Crystal was watching. My suspicions were confirmed when I hit her entry for July.

'July 5th'

'I broke it off with Tommy at the fireworks yesterday. I can't do it anymore. Every time I look at him I see Dad's cock. I keep seeing that thick pole, that massive load. God I need a dildo.'

I don't know what hit me more; the fact my daughter was being a voyeur for me; or that at that moment I had the hugest raging hard on I could remember in years.

'August 3rd'

'I got my dildo from Amazon today. I waited until his shower, and then watched him. I love when he grunts just before he blows. I have to be careful, almost got caught. When he came I think I moaned. When he was done I fucked myself silly with that plastic cock.'

I gently set the book back down on the bed in its original position. As I turned to leave a picture on her dresser caught my eye. I walked over and stared at the photo. We had been to Cancun; and gotten our picture taken on the beach.

Two things struck me as I stared at the picture; the first was that I really didn't look bad for a guy who had just hit his fortieth birthday. The other thought was, who was the hottie hanging on my arm?

Crystal's mother hadn't been in the picture since she was a year old. Maybe it was post-partum depression, or just that at twenty she wasn't ready to be a mom and wife. For whatever reason, I came home from work and had found half our closet empty and a piece of paper on the kitchen table just saying she couldn't take it anymore.

Being only one it had made things easier with Crystal, at least I didn't have to explain. We never heard from Mindy again; she literally just vanished. As she got older Crystal asked the usual questions, but we had a loving and open home so she quickly matured and seemed to settle into being an only child of a single dad.

How do I describe Crystal? I could say the normal of about five foot six inches and about a hundred and forty pounds; but that wouldn't give the right mental picture. All through high school Crystal had been in soccer, basketball, cross country; you name it. Even after school she took a job at a local fitness place for the summer, spending her free hours working out after her job. So, you have to understand body size isn't everything. Crystal had that lean, toned muscular body that screamed fitness. Her arm wrapped around me had well defined biceps; and her thighs showed the toned muscles of an athlete.

Now add a pair of 36D's and natural platinum blonde hair and you get the idea. I stared at those tits mashed against my arm in the photo and wondered if I had been brain dead when the picture was taken that I hadn't noticed.

They were encased in a dark blue bikini top, and the tops of her breasts just spilled out of the small cloth. I thought I had been hard with her diary; God I damn near came in my jeans just looking at that picture.

When had my little girl grown up? That was NOT a child standing next to me; that was about one of the hottest women I had ever seen; and I had NEVER seen, until now.

I don't know what possessed me, maybe it was the journal, or maybe it was the photo; either way I reached out and pulled open the top drawer of her dresser.

I stared at the thongs and filmy panties that lined the inside, but my eyes riveted on the thick plastic toy that lay nestled behind them. Reaching out I slowly pick it up; yeah it had to be about eight inches long, and thick.

I held it against the bulge in my shorts and was shocked to see that they were about the same size. God, she had bought a dildo that matched her father; and she was fucking herself with it...while she thought of what?

I returned the toy to its home, and without looking back headed out of Crystal's bedroom. For the rest of the afternoon and evening my brain held an internal war; one I had never experienced before; and was not equipped to deal with.

I had taken care of my daughter all her life, which meant for nineteen years I had basically put myself on the back burner. That isn't to say I didn't have sex; I did. But I would say at best it had been once every month or two.

My current dry spell had been for almost two months. Now, take a male who hasn't had sex in two months; who just got the eye opener of his life; and let a woman walk through his door wearing tight spandex shorts that just molded to the cheeks of her ass; coupled with a tank top that stretched around two perfectly formed breasts; oh and add to it was more than evident she was not wearing a bra.

You know what you get? Perpetual horniness for about three hours is what you get. By eight that evening I couldn't endure anymore. Crystal was stretched out on the couch reading a text book, and my eyes kept gravitating to those twin hard nipples staring back at me; or that tight camel toe just barely hidden between her thighs.

I did what any red blooded male would do; I headed for the shower. I was standing under the warm spray, facing the shower head; and yeas y hand was gripping my fat hard dick. Images of that picture burned in my brain as I slowly jerked my cock. The fact it was my daughter, I buried under the incessant need in my balls.

I think because of the journal I was a little more attentive this time. I thought I heard the soft protest of the door hinge as it was opened; it was confirmed when I felt a slight drop of the temperature in the bathroom as the cool air of the hallway slipped in.

Out of the corner of my eye I caught Crystal's shadow as she slipped inside and quietly sat on the toilet. The diary, the picture; even the dildo all collided in my brain. Slowly, without looking up, I rotated my body.

I knew I was in position when I heard a tiny gasp from the other side of the shower door. My hand never stopped moving as I pumped my now throbbing cock.

I kept my head lowered into the spray, but tried to peek just off to the side. What I saw sent a shiver down my spine. Crystal sat on the edge of the toilet, the top edge of her spandex shorts were pulled down; and her hand was jammed inside.

I caught a peek of light blue from her panties as her fingers worked her soaked pussy. I felt my cock throb in my grip, and I knew no matter what I tried, I wasn't going to last long.

I turned more just slightly, and lowered my throbbing cock, aiming the head towards the glass right beside the door. I felt my balls tighten as my explosion neared.

I couldn't help it, I swear; and I couldn't stop it. As the first volley of my thick cum burst from the tip; it splattered against the glass, oozing down the wet surface.

"Crystal" I grunted softly.

Crystal rocketed straight up; grabbing her shorts she rose and hustled from the room. I knew she had heard me, but I couldn't stop myself. Rope after rope emptied from my balls even after she had left.

I slipped out of the shower and dried off. I knew where she had hurried off to; and I also knew how wrong this was. Pulling on my robe I padded down the hall to her doorway.

I tried to listen at her door but honestly I can't hear much through wood unless the person is screaming. I reached down and slowly turned the knob, easing the door open just a crack. The fact I had done this of my own will showed me I had passed beyond the accidental and was now into the intentional. Did it stop me? Not just no...hell no.

As I slowly opened her bedroom door, I finally saw Crystal. She was sitting on the edge of her bed. At first I thought nothing was happening, and then I saw her body shudder, and realized her elbow was slowly moving at her side.

Why was she sitting? Ten I realized, she was looking at the picture on her dresser. Just as I had been captivated by her in the photo, she was using the image of me.

I started to pull away, figuring to give her privacy, and the fact I really couldn't see anything. Just then Crystal shifted, and slid back onto her bed. I should have left when I had the chance; just like when I had picked up her diary. Now, as her body slid more into view, I knew I was lost.

Because she had been sitting, I hadn't realized the obvious; she was naked from the waist down. My eyes riveted to those fantastically toned legs as she swung them up onto the bed. I glanced over her upper body still dressed in her tank top. Her taut six pack style belly flexed as she moved.

Then my searching gaze found it; oh God. She was either shaved smooth or at the distance I couldn't distinguish the fine blonde hairs. Either way her entire groin slid into view as she turned.

I would love to describe her pouty lips, or the curve of her sexy pussy; I can't. What I can describe is about six inches of hard plastic cock shoved up inside her, stretching her open to my gaze.

That toy was coated in froth, and her thighs glistened with moisture. Once she stretched out on the bed, the show really started. She reached down with both hands and gripped the end of that toy; and to my shock rammed the entire length deep into her.

I damn near blew another load standing there as she began to fuck herself with a vengeance. This was no passionate love making; this was animal fucking as a nubile nineteen year old pounded into herself.

I don't know how long I stood there, but it was long enough to watch her shudder through a violent orgasm as she abused her pussy. When I finally pulled my eyes from between her lewdly spread thighs; and looked at her lust filled face; I was horrified. For one thing, she was staring straight at the door, at ME. Did she know I was there? Was this a show for me?

I had heard all the stories of men who used women's panties as a fetish. Smelling them and jerking off to hem. Personally I had never committed the act, but I was well aware. What I had never dreamed of was watching my daughter hold a used pair of MY underwear to her face, inhaling my scent as she rammed an eight inch dildo up her.

Crystal hammered herself through another orgasm as she apparently stared at the door. By the time I pulled away it was more than evident this fantasy of hers was now also mine. As I retreated to my bedroom, I tried to comfort myself with the idea we hadn't really done anything. I mean we hadn't touched or had sex per say. OK, so I'm fairly good at rationalizing, I admit it.

The next morning I woke for work, and Crystal had already headed out for the day. With her schedule I wasn't sure if it was word, or class, or just hanging with friends. Whatever the reason, I was now in the house alone. What I did know was I had gone to bed alone, and definitely empty handed.

That meant I had not NOT brought a pair of pale green thong panties to bed with me; even if they were resting on my pillow next to my head. I wanted to deny them, just get up out of bed and totally ignore the thin cloth; I didn't.

As my fingers closed over them, I could feel the slight moisture, and even feel a bit of warmth in them. That meant they hadn't been there that long.

Just as the cloth hit my nose, my hand slid inside my underwear gripping my raging hard cock. In inhaled deeply as my hand started moving; images of Crystal smelling my underwear as she all but raped herself on her dildo sent my body into orbit. Even as my father brain screamed how wrong this was, my nuts tightened. 'Crystal' I grunted as I exploded in my underwear.

Some men wear boxers, I tend to prefer the tightie whities; it keeps the packed more firmly in place for me. It also means when you blow a load of hot cum; it doesn't just puddle against silk; it soaks up into the cotton cloth.

I pulled my drenched underwear free and as I rose for the morning, reached for my laundry basket. My hand froze with my underwear just above the basket. I shouldn't, but once again my brain shut down and I did the unthinkable. I padded through the empty house, and entered Crystal's bedroom. Two could play at this little game, I thought.

Taking my cum soaked underwear, I wrapped them around her dildo and set the prize on her pillow. I knew by the time she got home, the dried scum would cling to her dildo white and crusty.

Later that evening it was excruciating. We both acted as if nothing had happened; and yet we both knew. We were stepping into a very dangerous game, and neither knew where it was leading. By the time it hit almost eight; I was raging hard, thinking of what Crystal had done with my used underwear.

I finally headed up to the bathroom for my shower, my raging hard on more than evident in my jeans. Crystal sat on the couch and watched me leave, not saying a word.

Before going to the bathroom, I stepped into the door of her bedroom. Sure enough, my underwear lay on her pillow, while her used dildo was cast aside on the bed. God, the entire length was covered in white froth. The girl must cum like a swamp I thought. I wanted to pick up that toy and ick it clean; but held myself back.

I returned to the bathroom and started my shower. As I stood under the warm spray, my mind conjured up images of Crystal stretched out on her bed, shoving that plastic dong into herself as she smelled and licked my cum filled underwear. Saying your cock is hard doesn't describe me at that moment. I was so steel hard my cock actually hurt.

I felt the change in the air of the bathroom; I knew Crystal had just entered. I didn't turn to show her my profile this time. God help me, I turned to face her. I watched her sit on the toilet as we looked at each other through the steamed glass.

My hand continued to pump along eight inches of hard cock, while I could just see her hand slip between her spread thighs. That boundary shifted as we silently watched each other masturbate to the other.

To this day I couldn't tell you who moved, or who did what. I can tell you there is a hell of a difference between watching through frosted and steamed glass; and staring eye to eye after the shower door had slid part way open.

Crystal had her tank rolled part way up, one hand cupping her firm breast; while two fingers plowed into her sopping wet hole. Pre cum dripped from the tip of my cock as I stroked along the throbbing veins in full view.

Not a word was said as we pleasured ourselves, watching the other. When it finally hit, it had to be one of the strongest orgasms of my life. My cock jerked in my grip, and a thick stream of white erupted from the tip; splattering against the now open shower door.

Crystal's eyes fluttered; and her whole body heaved; as I watched a puddle form on the toilet seat under her. When her body finally settled down, she rose on shaky legs. She looked down at my still rigid cock, then up into my eyes. I had never seen raw lust before, I saw it then.

Without a word, she turned and walked from the bathroom and I heard her bedroom door close. I knew what she was doing once again. This time while tempted, I managed to resist. Heading to my own room, I slipped under my covers and fell into a fit full sleep.

For the next few days I tried my best to get our home back to normal. Every night I fell asleep to images of Crystal masturbating, or that perfect body under me; God I was sick. By Saturday I was a total wreck as I roamed the empty house. I figured I could get some things done around the house while Crystal was out. Yeah, I gave in. By now saying I should or shouldn't do something had died in my brain. I just did it.

'August 20th'

'I want to throw up. He called my name when he jerked off. Could he really want me? He must have used my panties, you can't hide dried cum. I'm scared, and horny. I saw his entire cock tonight, and when he came; God it was beautiful. My poor dildo damn near broke I fucked myself so hard.

'August 21st'

I am so stupid. I left a pair of my panties on his pillow. Why? I am in such deep shit. I wasn't even thinking. Well I was, about his cock. I want it.'

That entry was brief but so to the point I almost came in my shorts.

'August 23rd'

He watched me masturbate yesterday. God I exploded. I wanted to scream his name, but was scared. Tonight I watched him jerk off in the shower; no glass just us. It was the hottest thing I've ever done. Forget the kids at school or work; I want him.