The first time I had laid eyes on my uncle, I was ten years old. Even from then, he had a certain appeal that I couldn't get over.
Actually, to be truthful, he was my step-uncle. My mother had gotten remarried; Cliffe was my stepfather's younger brother by about an 8 year age difference. Cliffe was 21 when I was introduced to him at a gathering my mother and stepfather--who was then only her boyfriend--had at Mom's house.
Even though I was ten and wasn't really awakened to my sexuality at that point, I still remember being quite taken with his presence. He was a very large fellow, standing at about 6'4. He had spiky, deep brown hair and eyes to match. He was built very solidly, and I learned why: he'd been a football player in high school, a linebacker. He was broad, tall, and large, but not fat--the kind of guy you could run at and collide with, and you'd find yourself on the ground as if you'd charged a brick wall. My stepfather was his polar opposite; where Cliffe was interested in sports and had physical capability, my father was more into science and things more exercising of the mind than the body. He was also smaller than Cliffe, more narrow in structure, and a little shorter. It was a little hard to believe that they had descended from the same parents, but they had, and once my mother and stepfather married, Cliffe was officially part of the family.
Which should have translated to "off limits".
However, as I grew older and began to explore sex and experience attraction, I found myself attracted to Cliffe. He was every bit the type I had realized I went for: broad, strong, but not overly a "muscle man", with dark features and a mid-pitched voice. I didn't like the male voice too nasally, nor did I like a booming bass...an odd thing to contemplate, but as I first began to notice men, everything was a point of analyzation for me. Everything I had discovered I liked about the opposite sex, I saw in Cliffe...only the conflict of interest in that he was family, even if by law, had me in turmoil.
Cliffe visited from time to time, usually to see his brother. He had a passing sort of affection for me; I was a very precocious girl and often found that most people my own age were a consummate bore in conversation. Normally, I talked to my father or mother, and befriended people a few years my senior, hoping to find more maturity than seemed readily available in my age pool. Conversation with Cliffe was rapid, witty, and intellectual, and I began to look forward to his visits more and more as I grew older and, of course, smarter.
Time passed as briskly as autumn leaves fell from trees. Cliffe had been single and dating for awhile during my teenaged years, but that soon came to an end one day when I was nineteen and in my first semester of college. He met, dated, and soon married a girl named Elaine. When I met her, I liked her; she was smart, funny in a more benign way than the razor sharp wit my uncle often preferred, and educated. She did, however, seem a bit conservative for Cliffe. I've heard of opposites attracting, but something about her just didn't seem to completely fill Cliffe's personality. She seemed like the type to make a model wife, mother, homemaker, and everything else that comes with marriage. Maybe I was wrong, but I always felt Cliffe was the type for a more...risque companion, or at least one that had a little brass to her. Elaine was your typical "nice girl".
Still, I attended the wedding and wished them well. I had dressed in a tight, basic black sheath of a dress, but in my normal unique fashion, I decided to pair it with a pair of old-fashioned fishnet hose, the kind with a very wide grid pattern and seams up the calves. Black, three-inch, patent leather heels topped it off. I had my own way of dressing for an occasion. I got a few puzzled stares from my stepfamily, but most seemed to enjoy my anachronistic mix-and-match fashion. The whole time especially, I felt my newly married uncle's eyes all over me. Even during the ceremony, as they stood before the priest, his eyes fell on me in a strange way. They almost said to me, "This feels like more of an ending than a beginning." Perhaps he had had the same curiosity about me as I about him, but now that he had tied the knot, nothing was possible anymore.
Which, to me, was a matter of opinion.
Defiantly enough, I felt there was something unfinished between us. Marriage or not, if we chose to finish it, I simply felt that my new aunt had stepped in a trifle too soon. Perhaps it was her fault, perhaps not...but I still felt no guilt over keeping an ever-interested eye on Cliffe. > > > > > > > > I continued typing, not really listening much as my mother carried on the other end of the phone, giving me the news of what was going on with my younger brother's grades, my stepfather's job, and others. It was nine o'clock and I was in my dorm room, finishing up an assignment. I sort of wished she'd reach her point and say goodnight.
"By the way," my mother added, "your uncle Cliffe doesn't live that far from your campus. If you're going to attend Jim's dedication next week, maybe you should ride with him. It's a long way out to Adkins, and you mentioned that you didn't know how to get there."
"Well, I want to go," I said, fibbing just a bit, "but we're going to have to head off really early to make it on time. Would Cliffe even be willing to go out of his way before he leaves?"
"You could stay at his house that night. That way, you could just wake up in the morning and go," Mom suggested.
"Sounds good. Does he know about this?"
"I'll call and ask him for you. I'm sure he won't mind."
"You think we'll take Elaine's car or his? He still drives that tiny little foreign thing that I'm not sure how he manages to fit into."
"Elaine's not going. She has to leave town a few days beforehand. Her grandfather just died, I told you earlier," Mom said. "I knew you weren't listening because I still heard you typing."
My face grew red, and my hands fell from the keyboard. "Oh. Sorry. That's too bad about her grandfather. But sure...see if Cliffe would mind if I rode with him that morning. If not, I suppose I won't go. Too far, too early, and I'd be sure to get lost."
"Okay, but don't worry. Why would he object?" Mom paused, and I could hear a sneeze muffled in the background. "In the meantime, I need to get to bed. I've caught something, apparently. I'll talk to you later on, okay, dear?"
"Sure. Love you," I said.
"I love you, too. Goodnight."
I hung up the phone, the widest grin playing across my face. > > > > > > > > > > Mom had made good on her offer, and she called me a few days later to inform me that Cliffe said he'd be more than happy to let me stay over and give me a ride to the dedication the next day. I wasn't particularly thrilled about the dedication ceremony--some school was dedicating a building to my grandfather, I wasn't exactly sure what for--but I'd never spent more than a few hours with Cliffe, and especially never at his house. Cliffe was always pretty busy with work, so when he did visit, it was never for long. I would actually be spending the night at his house. And almost as if fate had smiled on it, Elaine would be out of town then. It would be just the two of us. If nothing happened, then nothing happened. If something did happen, however, then nature could properly take its lustful course. I remembered, however, that the interest for all those years had seemed almost totally on my part. He had given me a rare few sidelong glances, but maybe they were just of a familial admiration. Perhaps he wasn't even interested in me at all, not to mention the fact that he was now married, and might have a strong constitution against infidelity.
