It was an hour before Jeremy's train was scheduled to arrive. Angela had already cleaned everything that needed cleaning, and was puttering about, sorting and resorting books, when he called. Her heart pounded, seeing his name on her phone, but it was hard to hear his voice clearly. From the background noise, he must be on the train. Not like him to call like this. Something clenched in Angela. He sounded...different. And then she caught his words.
"Aunt Angie...yeah, yeah, still on time...look, is it okay if my friend Zoey stays too...just the night? One night. Did you hear me ok? No worries if not...oh, hang on, I think there's a tunnel coming up. I can explain it all when we get to yours. Just, would that be ok?"
Angela felt her world imploding so viscerally that she literally put her free arm out to protect herself, as if the walls of her flat were suddenly falling in toward her. She managed to stumble out a polite "Sure" and then they were cut off.
She stood in complete stillness. Then threw the phone across the room onto the couch. She didn't want to talk to him if he could get through again. She felt stupid and desperate. Stupid for not seeing that he would have a girlfriend already, somebody his own age. Desperate for all the preparations she'd been making for days, in her flat, in her hair and outfit, in her mind.
But she could also feel her body's rebellion. Despite the shame that she felt at her own delusion, she could still feel the pulse in her belly. She had fed herself too much fantasy and hope and they couldn't be easily extinguished, even by the mortifying prospect of welcoming Jeremy's girlfriend to stay overnight in her flat.
She walked over to the couch, picked up the phone again, and without texting ahead, called Jewel.
"Hiya, what's up?" came her friend's response.
"Jeremy just called. From the train. He's bringing his girlfriend to stay with him overnight."
"Oh, he has a girlfriend?"
"Yup. Zoey apparently. She probably has orthodontic braces, and, you know, perfect tits."
"He told you this is his girlfriend?"
"No."
"So, how do you..."
"Oh, come on, what else would she be? I mean, this whole thing, I've been fooling myself..."
"I thought you knew all the inside scoop now? Like you have a secret spy channel with his mum or something. Wouldn't she have told you?"
"Maybe he's hidden this Zoey from her."
"Yeah. That's possible. And it's possible you're jumping to conclusions."
"And what if I'm right? What if I answer the door all dressed up for seducing my nephew", Angela made air-quotes with her free hand, taunting herself with the word that wasn't literally true but caught her feelings of taboo, "and in they walk arm-in-arm ready for a night of making out in my spare bedroom!"
"Well, yeah, your right. Safer to just give up now. Crawl back into the woodwork. Maybe start looking online for all those cats your going to rescue from the mission."
"Shut the fuck up!"
"Oh, wow, you are wound up."
"I'm sorry, I just..."
"Sorry? Don't be fucking sorry. Be real. You could be right...but you could be wrong, and about to talk yourself out of the best experience of your life. Which way to you want to play it?"
"I...I don't know," Angela replied sheepishly. "I guess that's why I'm calling you."
"Ah, sweet. Girlfriends. And, so, what does your pussy say?"
"My what?"
"You heard me."
Angela sighed. She paused and closed her eyes and tried to discern the answer. "I'm still here," she said finally.
"I know. No hurry."
"I want him. I want him so bad, that's why it hurts."
"Enough to take a risk?"
"Maybe."
"Do me a favour. Remember that selfie you took of yourself? Before going out dancing?"
"Yeah?"
"Pull it up."
"Why?"
Jewel groaned loudly. "Just do it, alright? No, actually, better. Take another one of yourself right now and send it to me."
Obediently Angela walked over to the kitchen counter where there was more light, clicked on her camera app, and shot a selfie. She sent it and then stared at the image, trying to discern her own expression. She was wearing the pretty skirt they had picked out, just above knee length. Jewel had advised her to wear a bra - without one looked too casual, not classy enough. But she had and taken full advantage of the button down blouse to show some cleavage, not spilling over like Susan's fuller breasts might have done, but still...athletic she hoped. Underneath it all, Angela had, unbeknownst to Jewel, switched from body nylons to an old fashioned garter and silk stockings. With her new haircut, she looked...
"Ok, got it," Jewel announced. "Nice. So...what do you think?"
"Yeah, you made some good choices for sure."
"You look?"
"I don't know, 30ish?"
"Don't give me a number."
"Um, I look like, a woman," Angela managed to laugh at this opening, "who, well, a woman who likes her body. And wants to...attract men. Not desperate, just...confident. Sexually confident."
"I like that. Sexually confident. Say it again."
Angela took a deep breath and tried to really absorb the image of herself on the screen. "I look like a sexually confident woman."
"Look like?"
"I am," she corrected. "I am a sexually confident woman."
"Go girl. And how does your pussy feel now?"
On another occasion, Angela might have rolled her eyes at Jewel's corny dialogue, but in the midst of her wavering doubt she leaned into her friend's support.