It is every man's worst nightmare.
No man deserves this, I thought, standing there with my dick literally hanging out at half-mast. Sure, women always reserve the right to say no - no argument on that front - but there must be some sort of a guideline that says you should not say no once the man is undressed and reaching for protection. Even if that man is your father. Especially if that man is your father, I thought bitterly, because it is a big enough step just deciding to have an affair with your own daughter. For just a moment there, I even contemplated ignoring her wishes at this point - I could always say, "Father knows best," couldn't I?
I have no idea even now what were the emotions that I must have expressed on my face at that moment, although Nikki has always claimed that I looked like a thrashed puppy. Looking at the mirror was hardly my main concern at that moment, wouldn't you say so? There was equal parts irritation, frustration, anger and just the smallest hint of relief that we had not yet crossed that final line. The Supreme Court may say so, but oral sex is not really sex, right?
"I guess Mom did not tell you about this part, eh?" she said as she reached for the condom I still held in my hand and flicked it away. "She must have been the one to tell you about the flowers and the champagne and the way I wanted to be undressed by you for the first time, but she must have skipped the part about me wanting to feel you at your rawest inside me."
"Oh. So that's what you meant. Oh."
"What? Why're you looking at me like that? What did YOU think I was talking about?" And then her smile grew wider as she hit upon the truth. She was shaking her head and grinning at the same time as she said, "You thought I didn't want you anymore, didn't ya? Oh my God... Dad, get real, would you? There is no way on earth I would ever say no to you..."
"Yeah, I know," I said, trying to shrug and probably making it look as if I had a nervous tic I could not get rid of. "I mean, I didn't think you were saying no. Not that you can't or anything, you know, anytime you want to stop you just have to tell me..."
"Dad," she said, reaching for me, pulling me down on top of her. Our faces were just inches from each other when she said, "Dad. I. Have. No. Regrets. About. Us." She kissed me on my nose. "Unless you stop right now, in which case I might probably have to rape you."
"Funny," I said, trying to be funny. You know how I am. Should have kept my mouth shut. "I was thinking the same thing about you."
She raised one of her eyebrows. How did she manage to get it that high, I wondered, and those eyes... "You said I could say no anytime I wanted," she pointed out.
Thankfully, I was saved from making an even bigger fool of myself in front of her when she gave me another wet kiss on my lips. Rolling over on the bed, we ended up with her squatting on top of me, her knees on either side of my chest, our faces molten together. Her hair fell all around us in a gloriously erotic manner, as if shielding us from the rest of the world. Her beautiful face filled my vision. I doubt either of us would have cared even if a nuke had gone off next door. I do not think either of us even remembered that we had a neighbor next door itself.
When she withdrew her face, leaving both of us gulping in a big lungful of air, and straightened her spine, the tip of my cock - now at full mast, to use a cliché I had picked up earlier - brushed against her ass. It might not have been the first time that it had happened, although it was certainly the first time that I was aware it did. As good as it felt against her bare skin, as fantastic as I knew it would be to sink it in her and let go, it would not be a sensible choice. For a second, for just the smallest period of time, reason reasserted itself.
"Honey, maybe we should use some sort of protection," I suggested, albeit half-heartedly. There was something distinctly unattractive about the prospect of getting up and trying to get a rubber on me again. Well, not exactly 'again', but I suppose you get the picture.
"No," she stated in between kissing her way down my chest.
I tried to keep my composure despite the sensations she was arousing around my tummy. "You could get pregnant. Maybe I have AIDS."
She raised her head for just enough time for her to remark, "This isn't exactly the time for a rational discussion, Pop." She tickled my ribs, stopping at the end of the scar on my right side. She trailed a finger along its length, her expression suddenly serious, and a single tear made her way out of her eye and fell on me. It was so silent I could have probably heard it fall if I had paid it any attention. I was riveted by the look on my daughter. I knew she was thinking about that day when I had gotten myself shot. If I had to do it all over a hundred times again, and I know that sounds corny, I would do the same thing every single time.
And then she tweaked my nipple so hard I nearly threw her off.
I reciprocated on both her nipples, and she did scream "Daddy" so loud I was half-expecting the glass to shatter. I grinned like a sadist as I whipped her back on the back and rose above her, pinning her arms with mine. She raised her legs and wrapped them around my waist, leaving just enough room for my cock to slap against her pussy lips as it vibrated rigidly. I looked into her eyes for askance just before I slid slowly into her, and she nodded her permission and closed her eyes.
I have not yet come across a single word that can describe how it felt, that first sensation of actually being inside her, of becoming so intimate we were not two bodies anymore but one. A tongue feels its environment quite differently from a dick. Where I had tasted her earlier, I only felt her warmth now. Where I had found her slightly salty, slightly musky, I now found her wet and welcoming. I wanted to savor our first penetration for as long as possible - there was no denying that THIS was sex after all - and pressed against her hymen for a couple of seconds before it sunk into me that I was, undeniably, her first lover.
I had never expected to be. Even as I had accepted that her love for me had been there for some time, I had just assumed that somewhere along the line, she might have actually lost her virginity to a boyfriend. Jimmy, for instance. If being your daughter's lover sobers you, imagine that you are going to be her first lover as well. I was shaken to the core of my cynicism. Had she really been saving herself for me?
As if sensing my thoughts, Nikki opened her eyes. Yes, they seemed to say, and I hope I will not be one any longer.
The father in me stopped the lover in me from breaking into her. God, I ought to kill that guy - stopping me at the threshold of every pleasurable moment that we could share just because he was still so protective of his daughter. Since I could not do that short of committing suicide, I obliged him once again. For the last time, I told myself. After that, even a SWAT team would not stop me from doing what was so damn close and yet so damn far.
You must have probably noticed that I am talking about myself in the third person here. In my defense, try having a conversation with your inner self when you are having sex. You will know what I am talking about.
Anyway, let it suffice to say that I did pause. And I did tell her, "It's gonna hurt, baby."
She contorted her face into her first real expression of frustration. "Of course it's going to hurt," she retorted, placing her hands by her sides, palms facing down on the bed. "I am not a kid anymore." As if emphasizing her point, she pushed herself upwards, thrusting me all the way into her depths. She bit into her lips so tightly in order to suppress the scream that the skin broke and a tiny drop of blood fell on her chin. The very next moment, exhausted, she relaxed. I almost slid out of her as she fell back on the bed. Her legs, though, were still around my waist.
I started to fuck her leisurely, even though I was once again fighting the urge to cum inside her as soon as possible. We started to kiss each other wherever we could, as if in a race against time, and those kisses soon turned into nibbles and bites as the tension started to become unbearable within each of us.
To this day, I have no idea how I was able to hold it all in as long as I did. At the same time, I would like to say I delayed my release until she started to have her orgasm, but that would be a lie. I came first - I take no pride in that fact, but there it is - and it was perhaps the sensation of my jism hitting the walls of her pussy that finally pushed Nikki over the edge. I can take all night to list all the clichés I can use to appropriately address how I felt at that moment; suffice to say that it was something better than taking a piss after spending a day and a half inside a freezer.
