In chapter one, I related a truly tragic mistake I made last summer (2013) with my only son. After accidently observing my son masturbating, I was enticed to watch an erotic video with him, that leads to us each touching ourselves.
Ultimately, because of my intense loneliness, and my need to be touched and loved, I allowed my son to penetrate me with his fingers and take my erect and rigid clitoris in his mouth.
My son had just forced the most intense, powerful and longest orgasm of my life on me; driving me to a shattering climax with half with half his fist inside me and his lips and tongue on his mommy's rigid clitoris.
I could not believe I had allowed this to happen. The reality of my actions suddenly hit me, unexpectedly. The combination of my long overdue sexual release coupled with the enormity of my sin came over me in a wave of panic and guilt. I had an emotional breakdown.
"Oh, baby, I am so, so very sorry," I sobbed as tears began to flow uncontrollably. "I never meant for anything like this to happen. I promise, it will never happen again." I was crying hysterically now.
Ben pulled me close, hugging me deeply, attempting to comfort me and calm my crying. "Mom, it was a beautiful, beautiful thing. There is nothing to be sorry about. I love you, and I want to make love to you. This is what I have wanted for a long, long time."
I knew it was not a beautiful thing; I was well aware that I had committed a grave sin.
"Oh Ben, it was terribly, terribly wrong of me to let this happen. Baby you are my son. I should never have let this get this far; I should never have even let this get started. I should never have let my weakness allow me to use you this way. I promise, baby, it won't happen again."
Ben's fingers lifted my chin to look into his eyes. "Mom, I want it to happen again, and again. I need you and want you." He paused for a second, took my hand and placed it on his erect penis and said, "Mom, I need to cum again now. I need it bad. I need your help."
I slowly withdrew my hand from his erection, I was wearing only a t-shirt now, Ben had removed and discarded my panties on the floor in front of us moments earlier.