Mourning Sunshine
Not quite sure where this story came from. This may not be to everyone's taste and may make some of you a touch uncomfortable - but all is consensual with no violence. It is what it is. I'm sure you'll let me know what you think. As pure fiction any resemblance to persons living or dead, or recognizable locations or events is a pure coincidence
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Andy felt deeply satisfied on returning to his regular daily walk after all the hoopla around his seventy-fifth birthday. His mind retraced the party with both his children and four of the five grandies and the fun time and love they had thrown at him.
The only disappointment at the party was that his eldest granddaughter, Ella, was off trekking around Europe for a month. She was his secret favorite, although he was very careful not to show any bias to any particular grandchild. He was proud of her achievements as a graduate nurse from UPenn, with a major in psychology, and with two years solid experience at a hospital in Philadelphia.
Andy felt a suppressed pride when he heard the full story about the latest happenings to Ella. She had landed a plum job at detox and rehab centre for the rich and famous at twice the salary with full accommodation on a two-thousand-acre ranch out west. The job started in two months.
Ella quit her job in Philly, moved home to wait out the time before she started. On a whim she took off to travel around Europe. Andy was not clear when was she was due back to prepare matters before starting the new position.
All was not fun and light at the party for Andy. He would have happily foregone the celebration had Val, his wife of fifty years, survived the two years since the pancreatic cancer had taken her from his life. He still missed Val so much.
Andy felt as though he had emerged from his grief six months earlier and established a routine that saw him walk for an hour each day around the neighborhood and nearby trails when it was above freezing and dry. He jumped on the treadmill set up with a TV in the basement when the weather was inclement.
In his quiet moments, when he was not physically active, he knew he still mourned the death of his Val.
Many of the people he knew when Val and he were a life-loving couple together had slipped away from him. Only two close friends remained in occasional contact, and they had backed off to be no more than acquaintances. Both were uncomfortable as they saw Andy as slightly different person than he had been with Val. They wondered about some of his strange behaviours he had developed but remained in contact with him despite his flaws. All his neighbors and others in the area became accustomed to seeing this elderly gentleman trekking around the area in his work boots, using tall walking poles and always wearing a head covering.
Andy was now able to think about Val every day without distress, but a deep-seated sadness remained. The daily walk was prime time to visit his memories of her. He replayed how they met as rooky teachers at a new school time and time again. She was the junior in the English department. He was tasked to establish the new mechanical shop for those with less than academic aspirations.
As he walked, on different days he thought about out specific parts of their life together.
Just four months after meeting Val, they announced their intention to marry. They were both twenty-three. Despite the pressure on them, and perhaps with some intent to rebel against the advice, they went ahead immediately with a modest civil marriage ceremony. Everyone expected their marriage to last no more than three years. Fifty years later, they just made their golden wedding anniversary with the celebration being held in a hospice. Val died five days later.
Val stayed at home with their two children until they entered the first grade before returning to her teaching at the same school as Andy. They both lived their full working life in the classroom and shop at the same school, ending up with good pensions when they retired as early as they could.
Financially, their early days were a bit of a struggle living in a rental house on their starting salaries. Things got worse when after a year Val become pregnant with and gave birth to Kate. Two years later, William arrived exactly nine months after Andy and Val took a cruise given to them by Val's parents. Val went on birth control pills and their family was complete.
It took a decade of careful budgeting, and some financial help from their parents before they could afford to buy a modest single storey, elevated ranch-styled house on a good-sized lot. Andy finished the basement, did all the maintenance, and created a significant vegetable garden. The budget did not stretch to vacations away, just day trips.
The area of the high-ceilinged basement stretched out to be the same as the ranch house. Val thoroughly enjoyed doing the laundry. He did not understand her pleasure at this activity but ensured he built a very large, well-lit laundry room with a central ironing bench, hanging drying area and a large linen cupboard. The double doors closed off what was understood to be Val's exclusive domain, such that Andy only went in there by invitation to clear the dryer extract duct of fix the washer. He never questioned her control over this space, which he had meticulously built to her specifications.
Another decade later they both received substantial bequests around the same time from relatives who had died. They were able to pay off their mortgage with money to spare. They all went to Disneyland to celebrate, the one destination family holiday they ever took. There was enough left over for Andy to fulfill his lifelong dream. They bought a somewhat run-down lakefront cottage in northern Minnesota. Thereafter all vacations were spent at the cottage.
Andy meticulously upgraded the cottage property to a point it gradually became a full serviced, comfortable house, again with a generous laundry room. When not making improvements, he was fishing or hunting. Val mainly read a lot, and cooked wonderful meals.
Between them they decided not to trade up from their old ranch home for a new, larger modern house as they knew the kids would soon leave and they had no desire to rattle around in a large mansion, even though by this time they were able to afford a more spacious place.
The children won good scholarships and went to university. Kate finished her fine arts degree already pregnant with Ella. The father, James, married Kate, and their marriage, although rocky at times, endured. James went on to be a successful lawyer. Several years later they added two more daughters to their brood.
Andy's and Val's son, William, became a civil engineer and found a procession of assignments overseas with increasing responsibilities, seniority and pay. He always came home to his parents when back in the country. He eventually met a twenty-year-old on a visit home, married her, and settled down in a well-paid senior position at a consulting engineering company. They quickly produced twin boys, before shutting down any further expansion of their family.
Both Kate and William lived within half-an-hour of the parents. This was good news for Val and Andy. They loved their kids and, as they came along, the grandchildren spent enough time with them to become very mutually comfortable with each other. Andy or Val happily spent innumerable times supporting, and transporting the grandies to play soccer, football, volleyball, swim meets, track and field events, hocky and tennis. They loved their growing grandchildren.
This was particularly true for the eldest grandchild, Ella, Kate's early woops child. Being the first to start the next generation and, initially, as the only grandchild, Ella had sleep overs with Val and Andy on a regular basis. Andy's favorite time were the weekend sleepovers in the early days when Ella came into their bed early on a Sunday morning and snuggled between Val and Andy.
After Val's death Kate and William made sure they had regular contact with their father by telephone at least twice a week and Andy visited one of them every Sunday for a full family lunch.
Once over the initial grieving period, Andy started writing a memoir in an episodic format often from the particular memories he had conjured up on his walks. As each chapter was complete on a more-or-less monthly basis, he would send it to his children and grandies. Both Kate and William noticed two things that stood out when considering the memoir; the comparison of vagueness of his descriptions of his early years to the sudden change containing detailed accuracy of his life after he met Val, and the fact he referred to himself in the third person throughout the pieces.
He explained his use of the third person to Kate and William by telling them that he felt he was looking down on his life from a drone. His children worried that he was detaching himself from reality and his own personality. Although over his raw grief, the residual mourning continued.
