My brother and I were a little distant as we developed our lifetime personalities. It's not like it was abnormal, but he was three years older than me and especially in high school neither of us wanted to share our friends. He had his world and I had mine.
My brother Jeff got married when he was twenty-two while he was in college and they began their life together near their college, so I was never around them long enough to really get to know his wife beyond a superficial friendship. I got married three years later when I turned twenty-two as well. I married my boyfriend from high school, which I'd remained close to.
I wasn't the most self-confident person, and probably wouldn't have gotten married if I was. My boyfriend and I were still apart from each other as he remained home to attend the local community college, while followed my parents request to get away and explore myself while going to college. Actually I only followed their advice to get away and go to college, because I can't say I did any self-exploration. During school my husband would stay at home with his parents and during the summer months we rented a furnished apartment on a month-to-month arrangement and pretended to be a normal married couple.
It was obvious to me from our first months living together that we weren't really compatible. While I was typically a quiet and shy girl I knew I wanted something more sexually adventurous from my husband.
In high school I was very popular even though I was shy. Everyone knew my boyfriend and I were "a couple" so I didn't have to turn guys away, but there were many popular guys wishing that Jeff and I would suffer a break-up. My husband was active in all the popular high school sports, while he was never a college scholarship quality athlete. I would describe him as very handsome at 5' 10" and around 175# with dark hair groomed short and clean shaven as I liked him to be. I would hope he would describe me as pretty, but think the first word he might use would be cute. I'm on the short side at 5' 4" and very petite with average-to-small breats for my size, long dirty-blonde hair and hazel eyes.
It was my insecure feelings that things between him and I were falling apart and my belief that marriage could fix us that created my urge to be married. Being married didn't seem to resolve any of my insecurities and at the end of a short marriage we decided to divorce.
I felt humiliated, crushed and heartbroken, and the most difficult part of the process was informing my family of my failure as I began the process. I told my parent's first in a face to face conversation between buckets of tears and they were kind enough to pass the information onto my brother for me.
Jeff called me a few days later and reminded me his thoughts and prayers were with me and if I thought he could do anything to help, all I needed to do was call him. During our call I was fighting back my tears and trying to do my best to sound like I was confident in my decisions, but at that time I couldn't have been more unsure of everything.
We didn't sign the final documents until close to the summer break of school and I still had one more year to go. In a telephone conversation with my brother Jeff I explained to him that I'd signed off on the divorce, but of course it was a process and wouldn't be official until it was filed with the courts which was supposed to happen in a couple of months and I gave him the date I was told would be final. I also informed him that I wouldn't be going home for the summer break because I didn't think I could face our mutual friends and discuss the end of my marriage. Jeff said he understood, but reminded me that Mom and Dad would be unlikely to understand. I told him they would have to understand because I wasn't going home yet.
Jeff and I talked on the telephone a few times as he was making extra effort to check in with me to insure I wasn't going to fall apart and have an emotional breakdown. He called me the afternoon before my divorce was going to be finalized by the courts and I told him, "Tomorrow is going to be tough day for me."
"I can only imagine. I've been dreading that day for you since you mentioned it to me," He replied.
"I'm sure I'll survive," I said, trying to convince myself that my depression wouldn't overwhelm me.
"I wonder if I could get you to promise to do something for me that might help?" Jeff asked.
"You're going to tell me to surround myself with friends and keep busy... like everyone else has advised," I replied.
"Not exactly... I was hoping you might agree to come to the airport and pick me up since I've flown in to surprise you.
I squeaked with enthusiasm and replied, "Now?"
"I can take a taxi, but I'm not sure where you live," He said.
"I'll be right over. Will you be waiting out front of the arrival terminal?" I asked, still sounding excited as I scrambled to find my car keys and was thankful I hadn't changed from my good outfit into my grubby clothes.
"See you soon Sis... but don't crash the car trying to hurry," He warned.
I disregarded his warning and drove like a bat out of hell in order to get to the terminal as quickly as possible. This was the first time my brother ever visited me at my school and I suddenly wondered if it was possible that his wife might be with him. As I approached the terminal slowly I spotted him easily and pulled to the curb in front of him. Bounding from the driver's side I left my door open and dashed around to give my brother a tight hug.
"Thank you for coming... this is the best surprise ever," I acknowledged.
"Better than the time I put that toad in one of your boots?" He teased.
"Better than if you put all those kinds of times together," I said, and gave him another tight hug before a horn honked, turning my attention towards my open door and the trouble it was causing. I dashed around to close my door, while my brother tossed his single bag into the back seat and took his seat in the front.
"Sherry didn't come?" I asked as I was trying to be polite.
"Did you want her to?" My brother asked, while giving me a quizzical look.
"Not really, but she shouldn't know that," I replied.
"Don't worry Sis... she likes you only half as much as you like her," Jeff said.
"Ouch!" I teased.
"It's truly good to see you," He expressed as he seemed to finally settle into his seat.
"Are you hungry?" I asked.
"Starved," He replied.
"We can pick up something on the way to my place," I expressed.
"Or I could take you somewhere nice," He offered.
"I'm happy to see you, but I don't want to go out anywhere," I said, and showed the frown on my face to him.
"Do you mind pizza?" He asked.
"That sounds good, but I already ate so I won't have much, I replied.
"Then I'll only need one extra-large," He teased.
"One all-meat, fully masculine pizza to go?" I teased.
"Mostly meat... some cheese and black olives he replied.
I was so excited I nearly missed the driveway into the pizza place, but jerked the car sharply into the parking lot and we both went inside for him to order. The place was packed as usual for this time of night, but I knew they would be quick to get the pizza out to us.
"Be right back Sis," My brother said as he disappeared toward the door and to the outside. I couldn't imagine where he was going as my car was locked and only I had the keys. I thought about going to my car to see if that was where he was going, but knew he would return quickly once he realized his mistake. Our name was called and I brushed between several people to get to the pick-up window to identify myself and get the pizza box. While getting bumped and touched by others I managed to get turned around and through the mostly male patrons and to the door. As I exited Jeff was about to enter with a 12-pack of beer in hand and I realized he'd gone to the convenience store to get some beer.
"Good idea, I didn't have anything for you to drink," I said as we made it to my car and loaded in.
"The pizza was quick," He said as she peered into the back seat where I'd set it, then leaned over and tilted the lid to double check it was ours.
"They have a system that gets pizza's quicker than any other place in town," I said.
"Looks good," He said as he returned to his seat and we arrived at my apartment complex.
"It's not much," I warned as we headed up the steps towards the second floor units. I was carrying the pizza and 12-pack, while Jeff was following with his piece of luggage in hand.
"Nobody likes a place they rent," He said, as we stopped outside my door and after setting his bag down, took the pizza box from me so I could open the door.
"It's only a studio unit," I warned, as I pushed open the door, and exposed the small area to him.
