My Father in Law Moves In

***Edited by Demirath, thank you. -->LizzysFriend

***You told me not to do it, Dad. I did it anyway. It's not a real story.

"Man, will Beth be surprised when I show up home a whole day early," I thought as I drove my car home from the airport.

I had been gone for almost four weeks and this last contract job had been grueling, with twelve- to fourteen-hour days and constant stress from both the customer and my own bosses. I was more than ready to start our vacation. With all the overtime I had put in, these next couple weeks of downtime were sorely needed.

I was a little annoyed that my father in law's truck was parked on my side of the driveway when I got home. Only because I would have to back into the driveway to keep from getting my shoes wet from an earlier rain. I was always cautious with these high dollar shoes my wife bought me. It made me sick to my stomach when she told me they were over three hundred dollars at the time. My job paid well, but I went through sticker shock from the cost of my own wardrobe she occasionally purchased.

Dad, as I called him, has been living with us for almost a year. Out of everything this last year, I was proud how things worked out with him. I turned off the engine and sat in the car remembering the day I made him move in with us.

What did he say that day? Oh yeah... We were at his ranch house, arguing.

"James, I just can't leave her" he said.

"Why?" I asked.

"She needs someone to take care of her."

"Well, you sucked at it, and it is time to cut your losses before you die."

"I have been loyal to her for forty two years."

"Dad, you've enabled her to grow into that fat four hundred pound cow that sits on that damn couch. How many years, Dad, have you gone without her cooking a meal for you? How many years has she not done dishes, vacuumed the floor, or even given you a blow job. I am betting on at least ten."

"More than that, I guess," he said.

"Beth told me she wanted me to save you, and that means you have to leave her."

"She will starve."

"She will walk to the refrigerator and cook her own damn meals. She gets up to use the toilet."

"I will be a failure as a husband."

"You failed as a man already, time to man up. It's a new day."

"I am not going."

I cracked my knuckles and loomed over him.

After all, I am a pretty big man. I never had to threaten him in the past but I was tired of this bullshit.

"You either get into my fucking truck willingly or I am going to bust my hand on your face." I said seriously.

He stood up a little taller, judging the situation. Would he really fight me? He let out a long breath and deflated after only a few seconds.

"Look, Butch, you lost this fight, but it doesn't mean the end of your life. I am offering you a better life. It's a better life for her too although it will be a lot of work if she even wants it. My boys want to spend time with their grandfather. My wife wants her father happier. I am offering you a place to live, work for yourself, and maybe get laid in the future."

"Twenty two years."

"Huh?"

"I haven't been laid in twenty two years."

I put my arm on his shoulder. "Then you should have left her twenty one years ago."

"I don't know how. I am scared and old. Arlene was the only woman I ever slept with, and unlike you. I am terrible with women. Your teenage boys get more female attention than I ever did. Your oldest had girls calling him all day long when he was visiting."

"I trained him, Dad. I can train you but for that to happen you have to come home with me."

"I guess. Do I pack? I..."

"You start by giving me your cell." He looked at me perplexed but handed it to me. It was an older flip phone. I easily broke it in half.

"Now, just go get in my truck. Beth will go shopping for some new clothes for you. You need a new style anyway. Don't wake Mom, just walk out the door."

So he did. We talked all the way back on the three hour drive to my house that night. How can a man so old not know how to talk to women? It perplexed me.

He had no meaningful purpose once we left, so I gave him a temporary one and it stuck. Within a month of living with us he had a smile plastered on his face most of the time. Every night after work and dinner I enjoyed teaching him with my boys on things I learned in life. Within two months, my mother in law died. He didn't even want to attend the funeral. Beth and I did. There was only the two of us. She was a real bitch besides being hideously fat.

Ironically, she died in a car wreck driving to the store. We had her body cremated and buried her remains next to my late brother on law. Damn his soul to hell too, since he was an abusive ass when he was alive.

Our family unit seemed to bloom after that. Only... Dad was not trying to date. He watched my seventeen and sixteen year old fumble with girls but was afraid to use any advice I gave him. That was until I took them all to the mall for Christmas shopping about three months ago. I think that trip was the catalyst.

"Twenty five this year, boys, or you will walk home," I said from the driver's seat of my extended cab truck.

They both nodded. "They barely got the fifteen last year, and its cold, and seven miles. " Beth said. "Why are you so mean to them?"

I looked at her. This was a test. "If you grew a dick you would know this is a teaching moment. They must overcome their fear."

"Relax Mom, I'll probably have twenty five within an hour," the eldest boy said. She didn't seem happy but I didn't care. She stormed out of the truck. The boys got out, but Butch stayed in the back seat.

"Something wrong Dad?"

"What does twenty five mean?" he asked.

"Oh, that, they have to get twenty five phone numbers from different people. It makes them engage in conversation with complete strangers. Maybe one of those numbers will be their future girlfriend or wife even. For men, the fear of approach is one of the biggest obstacles to overcome to getting laid."

"Can you do it? Get twenty five numbers from complete strangers?"

"In a crowd this big, probably ten an hour, give or take a few."

"At what age did you learn it? When you were a teenager?"

"Twenty six, I went two years straight thinking that just going to the gym would get me a girl. My boys will not have that problem, gym or not."

He didn't look convinced. "I bet you a thousand dollars you can't," he said.

I took off my wedding band, "Give this to Beth when you see her and tell her your bet."

"I will."

"Deal," I said, and got out of the truck. I wasn't waiting on him. He had his own key after all.

After two hours I had thirty names, twenty of them women. I was in some sort of weird zone and I couldn't seem to stop, some of them would be business sales later I had reasoned. I had bought a spiral notebook to write my new contact's names on the way in and looking at the filled pages brought back lots of memories. Beth caught up to me sitting at the food court, with Butch in tow.

She slammed my ring down on the table then punched her Dad in the gut and stormed off.

I smiled and put the ring back on. I handed the book to Butch.

"Are these real?" he asked, and handed it back.

"Yes they are real. Why don't you call them to verify. I think maybe three are fake though, I marked those. When I was twenty five I couldn't even get one, but I have had lots of practice since then. How many for you?"

He hung his head. "None."

"How about we change that right now?" I looked at a line forming at the burger joint about fifty feet from us. A really attractive woman in her thirties was standing next to a portly looking short girl in the line.

"How?" he asked.

"Go up to that attractive woman and tell her that at seventy eight years old you have not asked for a woman's number in forty years but you would like hers to upstage me, then point to me."

"But that would be the truth."

"Yes it would. Be playful and teasing and you have to do it now. Remember confidence, eye contact."

He got up and walked towards her. I felt this sense of pride as Dad engaged the woman in conversation. She looked at me and I waved back, then I stuck out my tongue in a bratty little kid manner. I went back to reading my spiral. I had to start my count all over again. I wondered if my boys had done so well. Later I learned the little bastards had done a lot better and all female names. I just liked talking to people.

A few minutes later Butch came back, "She gave it to me! Jesus Christ! She did it." A number was written on his hand. He was really happy about the one phone number, but I was unsure. It was too quick of a conversation engagement I thought. She probably gave him a fake one. I wasn't going to steal this moment of joy from him though.

"Look at me, Dad." He did.

"Cool Dad, approach fear conquered for the moment. Work on fear of rejection now. I want you to get five rejections in a row. If they give you a number, you have to start over. Meet us at the truck when the mall closes." I handed my spiral to him, man should not be writing on his hand.

He nodded, and I think he looked like he was skipping. He certainly stood up straighter. I caught up to my wife shopping in the corner store near the food court. I teased her and joked with her, and if she had been mad, she wasn't by the time we walked back to the truck. We talked about her Dad a lot. It felt like we had a serious vibe going. I was tempted to sneak into the back area with her and fuck her right there in the mall, the sexual tension was that tight between us. Only now I was carry a large assortment of bags from her shopping. It was a good night.

The lessons went on with Dad many months, but he wasn't getting laid. He got a lot better talking to women, but couldn't close the sale. I could tell he was a better man though. He and the boys started comparing notes behind my back on social interactions with women. I was a little jealous at first but his stories with women were always on what not to do. They came to me with questions on what to do.

Now back in my driveway, I remembered the boys went to football camp for two weeks four days ago as I got out of my car. I briefly looked at my truck parked in front of Dad. It appeared still perfect in the nightlight. I guessed Dad and Beth should be the only ones home. It was odd that his bedroom light was on , as he is usually asleep by 10pm and it was after 11pm.

I noticed the back gate open just as I got out of the car. Ok, which one left the back gate open, had to be one of those two boys I was sure. I couldn't yell at them at camp though. I knew I would forget before they got back.

I went to close the back gate and decided to come in the back patio door since it was closer than the front door now. I got close to the glass door and it was slightly open. Very strange, and it made me nervous. If Beth is in bed, this door would be closed and locked.

The door slid open quietly. I closed it behind me and locked it. Nothing in the kitchen looked out of place. If anything, the kitchen was cleaner than normal. Nothing to worry about...

"Ohhhh!" came the moan. I tensed. Sounded like a cry of pain. I tip toed to my gun cabinet. I could clearly see my collection behind the glass undisturbed. No gun was taken of the six I had down here. I used my key to open the glass case and remove my Luger. I made sure it was loaded and started to sneak upstairs.

"Ohhh God!" came another cry. Then it hit me, half way up the stairs. Someone must be raping my wife. I hurried up the stairs in flash. My bedroom door was open and dark but I could tell no one was there with a glance inside. Butch's door was wide open and lit down the hallway. The noise had to come from there.

I froze in the doorway at the scene as I arrived. I clearly saw Butch nailing someone on his bed. His wrinkled body repulsed me. He looked like he needed some meat injected into his ass to keep his butt inflated. There was a fold of skin from it flapping as he fucked. His thin body just didn't look like it had ever been fed enough.

Who was the chick?

No.

It couldn't be.

My wife, at forty four, was still a beautiful woman. Her long dark brown hair grows grey at the roots now, so I make her dye it to back brown. I couldn't see her hair from this angle, but I imagined it. She always reminded me of Linda Carter, with the same blue eyes. My wife had gotten even prettier with age. I made sure to spend the money on her gym membership and manicurist for her to stay that way as long as she could.

Anyway, I could only see the distinctive heart tattoo on her ankle from the right side of this old man with a flabby butt giving hip thrusts to her ass. Beth wasn't into anal from my dick, but I certainly couldn't tell which hole she was getting it.

Butch's shoulders were straining with effort. His bald head was looking down, and that's what I would be doing. Beth has always had a nice heart shaped ass.

I had the gun in my hand. I shoved it in my pocket. Despite what I saw, I wasn't going to shoot either.

"Cum mutherfucker....Cum!!!!" Beth said out loud.

This was new. She never talks during sex that I remembered. I waited and watched. I wasn't turned on by the scene, but I wasn't angered by it either. It just was.

"Yes...That's it Daddy. I feel it!" she said. Oddly, her words sounded really fake to me. What the fuck is going on here?

Butch slowed down his hip thrusts. He withdrew his wrinkled hands from my wife's ass and just stood there looking at her.

"See Daddy, you can cum," she said and laughed. It was a mocking kind of laugh.

I coughed on purpose, once.

Butch turned around quickly and his old limp dick dropped a green colored condom on the carpet at the sight of me. His naked frontal appearance might have appealed to an old lady, but to me he needed a lot of gym time. He was shorter than me, and although a hard worker for years, he didn't have much noticeable muscle tone. I made a mental note to get him to the gym with me. I wish I had thought of it earlier.

He was looking at my crotch when it finally dawned on me that he was staring at the gun in my pocket and not my dick in my pants.

He slapped my wife on the ass to get her attention. "Yes, Daddy, just like that!" she said in a mocking tone still not looking my way.

"Beth... baby girl... James is home," he said meekly.

Her anger flared, "Dad I told you, be a man with your words. No woman likes her man to be a wimp."

I shook my head because that was my advice to him several weeks ago. I held up a finger to him.

I announced loudly, "Yeah, Dad, say it like this: 'Beth, James is home.'"

She screamed as she heard me and fell off the opposite side of the bed. The scene was hilarious. I laughed.

"Don't kill us James!" she wailed and her tears were flowing. She looked quite beautiful as she grabbed a sheet to cover herself. I took the gun out of my pocket and handed it to Dad handle first and just walked away and down the stairs to the kitchen. I heard some yelling and crying behind me as I went downstairs. I was just roaming, not understanding what I was doing.

I opened the refrigerator, looking for leftovers. Beth had always been a good cook, and eating out these past weeks sucked compared to her cooking.

I had started heating up what looked like pork chops in the microwave, when Butch came into the kitchen looking terrified wearing jeans and t-shirt. He said nothing as he walked over to the gun case and placed the Luger back inside. I threw the keys to the case to him. He almost didn't catch them, but he did lock it. He didn't give the keys back to me though. I didn't give a fuck.

The second bowl I found had cooked carrots.... Yum, made with real butter like I like them. I heated them up too as I prepared a plate. Man, I was hungry.

"You want something to eat, Dad?" I said.

"I ate with Beth."

I nodded. I didn't know what to actually do. I mean, I felt basically numb. I knew I was hungry though. With the food heated I sat at the counter waiting for him to do or say something as I ate. I was irritated because this felt like one of those moments where Beth wanted an argument and I just wanted to sleep. I laughed halfway through my meal. Butch kept quiet.

I got another three bites in when a storm broke as Beth came into the kitchen.

"How can you eat at a time like this?" she screamed. I rolled my eyes. I kept eating.

"I am so sorry James. It's all my fault. I don't want to die," she rambled on.

"Beth." Dad said meekly.

"It's just that, well I had these feelings, and Dad was actually pushing me away."

"Beth!" he said a little louder.

"I just got carried away when he told me no. I only meant to flirt with him. He didn't do anything, really" she continued.

I held up a finger to quiet her. I didn't feel like talking. I just wanted to finish eating my food. She quieted, then I spoke because I knew if I didn't she would ramble on.

"The pork chops are delicious, baby. Can you make them again next week for one of our lunches?" I asked seriously.

She looked confused and nodded her head. Maybe she caught on.

"Dad, I am tired and hungry. How about we plan on Beth telling us the full story tomorrow morning?"

"Shouldn't I be packing?" he asked again very meekly.

Beth looked nervous. Her eyes were red and she bit her lower lip. A sure sign she was under a lot of stress.

"You can if you want, but I think you should do it tomorrow after we talk this out if you think there is a need. It's late and my energy level is really low after that six hour flight."

Beth started to wail.

I had to lose my temper to get her attention, "Beth!" I yelled with conviction in my tone.

Her whimpering died down a little.

"Listen to me woman, I am tired. You are obviously upset. I am going to take a shower, and crawl into bed. I don't care what you do, but if you want to stay married to me, make sure the dishes are washed before I get up in the morning. My suitcase is still in the car and needs the laundry started on the clothes in it. Do you understand?"

With tears running down her face she nodded. It was a beautiful face.

I got up and placed my dishes in the sink for her, and went upstairs.

In the shower I thought of nothing. The hot water relaxed me more. I dressed in a t-shirt and boxers before getting into the made bed. Damn, the whole house even smelled exceptionally clean. I was asleep within moments of my head hitting the pillow. If I dreamed, I didn't remember it.

I woke to the smell of bacon the next morning. It looked like Beth had not slept on her side of the bed. It was still made. I wondered if she slept with Dad? That made me irritated.

I put on some shorts, and bounded down the stairs. A small coffee smell was mixed in with the bacon smell as I entered the kitchen. Heaven is in my kitchen.

Beth was cooking breakfast and that was unusual. She was wearing small blue shorts and a grey t-shirt. Her hair was a wreck, but even in this state I wanted to grab her ass. Maybe it was her guilty conscience? I never required her to make me breakfast since I normally left for work an hour before she had to get up. Butch was sitting at the counter drinking coffee.

Was I being punished with breakfast? I was actually laughing on the inside as I looked at the two adults, obviously miserable, looking at each other. Weird, it looked like they were having a good time last night. The couch in the living room must have been Beth's bed. Her favorite blanket was in disarray on it.

They looked at me like I was crazy when I said, "Smells good, have you two eaten already?"

"We need to talk," Beth said and shook her head.

"Damn, I hate talks before breakfast. How about you talk and I eat?"

They looked at each other, confused, but nodded. I felt like I was about to hear the story of a lifetime what with all the drama they placed in their head shaking. I knew I could suffer through with breakfast in my stomach though.