New Love Ch 02

Thank you for the reviews of the first chapter!

I tried to make it clearer in this installment when Jake/Chris were talking. Anytime there is a journal entry, Jake is talking.

Also, just to be super clear: this is a story about two twin BROTHERS (both male); so, if that's not your thing, don't read.

Oh and still no sex, but there are some pretty steamy moments. I promise they'll do it in the next installment. ;-) But who doesn't like a good build up?

All characters 18+

**********

Dear Journal,

Things between Chris and I have been going well. Ever since we started this new chapter of our relationship, we have been even more inseparable. The other night for example...

We were just lounging around in our room doing homework. Chris was lying down on his bed, knees bent, reading something. I was sitting on the floor leaning against his bed, legs folded, trying to figure out a math problem. As soon as we reached imaginary numbers in math, I was done. Math is just too ridiculous. And the problem I was looking at had too many symbols and letters to be really considered math anyway. Chris seemed to be having similar problems.

"I hate this." He groaned and put the paper down. "I can't even pretend to know what's going on in physics right now." He sat up and swung his legs over the edge of the bed beside me to look at what I was doing. "Do you get the math?"

"No." I said despondently and looked up at him. "I think when we split into two people in the womb we just split the brain cells of one person and put them in two brains. Why is this so hard?"

Chris chuckled. "Maybe we just need a break." He reached up and put his hand on my head and looked at me seductively.

"Hmm, maybe we do." I stood and sat on the edge of the bed next to him.

He quickly leaned in and kissed me. I brought my hand up to the side of his face to hold him there, and he placed his hand on my thigh, stroking it up and down. We have gotten pretty good at kissing if I do say so myself. His tongue had just finished exploring my mouth when he pushed me back onto the bed, a mischievous grin on his face.

He straddled me and pushed up my T-shirt and I helped him pull it off and throw it on to the floor. He leaned down and started trailing his tongue over the crevices around my collarbone, kissing at my neck. He worked his way down until he found my nipples, his favorite thing. He would flit his tongue on one and rub the other until he got me to moan. Once he was satisfied with that, he moved down even more, kissing my abs. He stopped once he reached the top of my shorts and just kissed back and forth across the skin right above them.

"Chris," I groaned, "don't be such a tease."

He chuckled as he continued the torturous kissing. "But I like being a tease." He smirked up at me. "Do you want me to go lower Jake?"

"Yes." I said and thrust my hips up for emphasis.

"Hmmm, lets see what's under here then." He pulled down my shorts slowly, making me groan again in anticipation. When he finished with that, he pulled down my boxers. I was down to just my socks; Chris was straddling me and sitting on my thighs, just staring. "We really are identical." He said.

"Chrisssss." I whined.

"Sorry love." He bent over until his face was just above my hard cock. He licked the tip and I gasped at the contact. He smiled and licked the underside of my length from base to tip.

"Mmmmm." I moaned. Finally.

He placed the tip in his mouth and swirled his tongue around it. He slowly went lower, trying to swallow my cock. He gagged a little, but was able to suppress that and devour my entire engorged length. It was so tight as he sucked on it, and feeling my tip in his throat was amazing. "Chris that feels so good."

Unable to respond he began to pull back off of my cock and then went down on it again. Once he got a good rhythm and began to pick up speed a little, I thrust my hips in time with his movements. He reached down his own shorts and stroked himself as he continued to pleasure me.

We hadn't done this before, and it was amazing. I was putty in his hands (or, to be more exact, his mouth). "Chris I'm gunna..." I said just as I began to shoot cum in my brother's mouth.

He had been about halfway down my length, so the cum quickly filled his mouth. I don't think I have ever come that much, and he was having a hard time swallowing it all. A little dribbled down his chin. When I was done and he had swallowed it all, I could tell that he was coming, too. When he finished, he collapsed on his stomach next to me.

"I going to have to pay you back for that." I gasped.

"Yeah, you will." He said through a smile.

"Good to know what I will look like with cum dripping down my chin." I point to his face and he reached up to feel the wetness.

"You wanna taste it? Its pretty good." He sat up a little and I licked it off of his face.

"Its...interesting. I wonder if you'll taste the same."

"I don't know, but what I do know is that I'm too tired now to do anymore homework." He closed his eyes.

"How bout we do it in the morning." I offered.

"Sounds good." He pulled the sheets out from under us and then pulled them around us. I was still naked, and Chris lay on his stomach right next to me, arm around my waste and leg over mine. "Night." He said.

"Night." I whispered back.

Gosh, I love him so much.

-Jake

**********

Chris' POV:

I can't believe I gave my brother a blowjob. That was all I was thinking at school. Thoughts of Chris had been filling my mind all morning ever since I woke up next to him and realized he was still naked from our evening escapades. I got him up with kisses, and we only stopped to avoid being late for school.

I was still daydreaming and walking down the school hallway when I heard it.

"I have the hugest crush on Chris!" A girl I recognized from my English class as Bella whispered/squealed while talking to her friends, obviously unaware that I was nearby. I quickly darted behind a nearby wall and peaked around the corner at them.

"You mean Chris and Jake, that Chris?" A second girl asked. Bella nodded.

"But you know what people say about them."

"What?"

"That they're a little TOO close, if you know what I mean."

"Oh come on, that's just gossip."

"No way," a third girl piped in, "I saw them holding hands the other day before school and I swear I saw Chris ogling Jake as he walked away. It was creepy."

The second girl nodded. "Plus, haven't you noticed that they've never even dated anyone?"

"Well, yeah, but its still a stretch to accuse them of incest just because they held hands and don't go after every girl who walks by." Bella declared.

"Whatever you say, but I still bet there is something going on. You should stay away from them; you don't want to be involved with something gross like that." The second girl said and walked away with the third.

I stood there shocked. I never realized that people thought like that. And the worst part was that I couldn't even storm over there and yell at them for saying such things about my brother, because they were true. Last night I didn't think there was anything wrong with my feelings for Jake, but now I had this painful knot in my stomach that told me there was something wrong, something very wrong. Besides the moral aspect of it, I was causing Jake to be to center of scandalous gossip. I couldn't just stand by and let my brother's name be sullied, could I?

No, I couldn't. I was his brother, his twin, and I had to protect him. Not only from the gossip, I realized, but from me. I was trying to take too much of him, more than a brother had a right too, and making it impossible for him to do normal things, like have a girlfriend and fall in love. How could I have been so selfish? I instigated all of this; I took our innocent, tight-knit relationship and turned it into something dirty. I had to fix this, and fast. I knew what I needed to do, and I knew I had to do it now before I lost the nerve.

**********

Dear Journal,

I have been crying for two hours now, so I figured it would be best to try to distract myself by writing. Let me explain.

As Chris and I walked home from school today, I could immediately tell something was up. Chris was being too quiet. I tried to subtly inquire as to why, but he shrugged it off so I tried to ignore it as best I could.

"Hi boys." Our mom said as we walked in the door. "How was school?"

"Fine." We said in unison as we threw our backpacks on the floor.

"Got any plans for this Friday evening?"

"No." I said.

"Uh, yeah, I'm going out." Jake said. I turned to look at him; he just continued staring straight ahead.

"Oh well that's nice. Where are you going?" Mom looked back and forth at us, a little confused. We never go out socially without each other.

Jake shrugged. "I'm going to the movies with a friend." I was staring at him, completely baffled.

"Well alright, have a good time." She said and turned back to what she was doing.

"Can I take the car?" He asked.

"Sure, your father and I aren't going anywhere tonight. Its all yours."

"Thanks." He said and walked upstairs to our room. This whole time I just stood there shocked. Who was he going with? Why didn't he tell me? Why wasn't I invited? Why was he keeping secrets?

When I finally collected myself enough, I followed him to our room and closed the door behind me more loudly than I meant to. "What the hell?" I yelled at him. He was just sitting on his bed casually. He looked up at me.

"What are you talking about?"

"You know damn well what I'm talking about. Why didn't you tell me you were going out?"

He stood up and stared at me. "Why do I have to tell you what I'm doing? It doesn't concern you!" He yelled back.

"What do you mean it doesn't concern me? If it concerns you, it concerns me. That's how we work!"

"Yeah well maybe that's not how we should work." He said, suddenly serious, as he looked down at the floor.

"What does that mean?"

"It means that something needs to change. We can't keep doing what we've been doing. Its not right for brothers to be as close as we have been." He still wasn't looking at me, but I couldn't stop staring at him. I couldn't believe what he was saying. My mind went blank. We just stood there silently for what felt like hours.

"But...why? What prompted all of this?" My voice sounded broken. He looked up and locked eyes with me.

"Doesn't matter. It doesn't change the facts." I had to will myself not to cry, and then I remembered one more question.

"Who are you going to the movies with Chris?" My voice was only a whisper now.

"Bella."

My body was on sensory overload. It felt like the world was crashing down around me and suffocating me, but at the same time I felt completely numb.

"So, it's a date?" It was me who looked down at the floor now.

"Yeah." He said. I left the room and ran to the bathroom and locked the door. I collapsed down on the toilet and held my head in my hands and tried to breathe. He's going on a date with Bella, was all I could think. He's going on a date with Bella. He's going on a date with Bella. He's going on a date with Bella.

I don't know how long I sat there, but next thing I knew I heard Mom yell. "Dinner!" My body seemed to move without me telling it to. I went and sat down at the table, Chris was already sitting there with our parents. I don't know what we ate. I felt like I was on autopilot.

Dad seemed to notice, because when dinner was ending, just as Chris got up from the table and was about to walk out, my dad said, "Are you alright Jake?"

Chris stopped walking and looked back at us. "Of course." I said. "Why wouldn't I be?" My voice sounded foreign to me.

"Well you just seemed very quiet tonight." He looked concerned.

"I'm just tired, that's all." I said as I got up. "I think I'll go to bed early." I brushed Chris' shoulder as I passed by him to go to our room.

"I'm just gunna grab a few things and then I'm going." I heard Chris say to our parents.

"Alright dear." I was in our room now not really knowing what to do. I just stood in the middle of it while Chris came in, got his jacket, and turned to leave. When the door closed, I immediately collapsed on his bed, curled into a ball, and cried. I knew I was probably over reacting. All Chris had really said was that we needed to change our relationship and that he was going out on a date. Maybe collapsing in the bathroom and silently dying during dinner was melodramatic, I told myself. Chris was allowed to go out without me.

But even as I tried to convince myself of this, I couldn't stop crying.

I love him too much for us to just end it like this.

-Jake

**********

Once I had made this decision, I turned the corner and walked right over to Bella who had still been standing there after her friends walked away. She seemed startled to see me, considering she had just been talking about me.

"Hey Bella."

"Hi Chris." Her voice sounded anxious. Well, I thought, it's probably just because she likes me.

"So I saw that there was this new movie coming out tonight, and I was wondering if you wanted to go with me to the premiere." I tried to act nonchalant, but this was my first time asking anyone out.

"Really? You're asking me out?" She looked shocked. Maybe she really had believed her friends.

"Yeah. I thought it would be fun."

"Uh okay! Here I'll give you my number." She fumbled around in her purse for a piece of paper and wrote it down.

"Cool. I'll call you and tell you what time and you can tell me where to pick you up."

"Okay." She smiled.

"See you later." I started to walk away and gave her a little wave.

"Bye." She said.

When I got home and Chris confronted me about the date, I could see how much pain he was in. I could barely make eye contact with him. I did this, was all I could think, I made him see me as more than his brother. I have to hurt him now in order for him to be able to move on.

But even as I thought that, it took every ounce of my willpower not to run over and hug him and tell him I'd cancel the date. As I walked out of the house to leave, I could feel it in my gut that he was crying, and I couldn't help but let a tear escape as I pulled out of the driveway.

When I got home, Jake was sleeping on my bed. I could see the dried tears on his cheeks. I sighed and slipped up into his bed, thinking that he probably wouldn't want to sleep with me tonight, and I didn't want to wake him up anyway.

**********

Dear Journal,

I woke up to the sound of my mother.

"Chris." She whispered. "Chris!" I opened my eyes and realized she was looking at me. Oh, I thought, I fell asleep in Chris' bed. She thinks I'm him.

"What mom?" Well whatever, I'll pretend to be Chris.

"A girl is here to see you. Her name is Bella." I jumped up. Why is Bella here to see Chris so early in the morning? I looked up; Chris was asleep in my bed. I hope he stays asleep, I thought.

I went downstairs and saw Bella in the doorway. I walked outside and closed the door behind me. "Hi Bella." I tired to say it in my best Chris-impersonation, but then I realized that no one could tell us apart anyway. If my own mother thought I was Chris, I'm sure I could trick Bella.

"Hi Chris. Sorry for coming over so early in the morning but I wanted to bring you this." She brought a box of Junior Mints out of her purse and handed them to me. "You left them in my bag last night."

"Oh yeah," I said, "I'm glad you brought them. Junior mints are my favorite and I wouldn't want them to go to waste." That sounded like something Chris would say.

"I also wanted to apologize."

I just stared at her. "For what?"

"For kissing you. If you want to take things slow, that's fine with me. I shouldn't have been so pushy." My eyes widened. Chris and Bella kissed? No, Bella kissed Chris. But that doesn't make a difference, I thought, someone has kissed him besides me. A jolt of pain shot through me.

"Oh that. Actually I had forgotten about it, it wasn't that big of a deal."

"Really?" She said, "You seemed kind of upset."

"Of course not," I said. Damn, part of me just wanted to hurt her. "I mean it wasn't anything special. Just an ordinary kiss." She looked a little hurt. I couldn't help but feel slightly glad. She had kissed my brother, after all.

"Right... well I'm glad your okay. I'll talk to you later." She turned to go.

"Bye." I went back inside and walked upstairs. I closed the door to our room, set down the candy on the counter, and looked up at the sleeping Chris.

There is no way I am letting this happen without a fight, I thought. And then I got an idea. I sat on Chris' bed and got out my Journal and wrote all this and will continue to write until Chris wakes up.

**********

I woke up and almost rolled off of the bed and onto the floor. Oh yeah, I thought, I'm on the top bunk. I climbed down and saw Jake quietly sitting on my bed.

"Jake!" I jumped. "What are you doing? You scared me."

"Writing." He said and looked up at me. Something in his eyes looked different; he looked determined. Then I noticed the Junior Mints on the counter.

"How did these get here?"

He never stopped looking at me. "Bella came over to give them to you. You were asleep so I pretended to be you and talked to her."

"Why did you pretend to be me?" I was confused. He could have just said I was asleep and gotten the candy from her.

He didn't answer. "She told me about the kiss." I froze. Bella had surprise attacked me, and I practically shoved her back. It didn't feel right kissing anyone but Jake. Yet, I had to remind myself, it didn't feel right yet. It would eventually.

"That's none of your business." I said defiantly. Jake stood up. Part of me expected him to punch me.

"Sit." He commanded and pointed to my bed.

"Why?"

"Sit." He said it even more sternly. I sat. Without looking at me, he reached over and handed me a book.

"What's this?" I looked at it. Was it a journal?

"Read it. When your done, open the door and I'll come back up." He left and closed the door with a thump.

I looked at the book he gave me. It was a journal. Had Chris been keeping a journal? Since when? I opened it and started to read.

"I had my first kiss, and with my twin brother no less. And I liked it. Am I weird for liking it? But he liked it to. This is the first time I have had something that I haven't wanted to talk to Chris about, but I can't talk to anyone else about it either. So that's where you come in Journal. From now on, whenever something like this happens, I will tell you about it, but we have to keep it a secret from Chris."

He had been writing things down about us, I realized, and in vivid detail.

"God, his lips were soft. If I thought my heart had been fluttering before, it was doing somersaults now. He held himself there for a few seconds and then pulled away a little and our eyes met, a smile broke out on his face again. I couldn't help but smile back."

"He stroked my hair. "Shhhh, its alright Jake, I'm right here. Shhhh." Him soothing me made my heart melt. I quickly stopped crying and just let him keep stroking my hair. God that felt good."

Everything he wrote was so sweet, it practically oozed love.

"When the door closed, I immediately collapsed on his bed, curled into a ball, and cried."

I had to hold back tears. I read the entire journal, and then I saw the last entry.

"Dear Chris,

There are things I need to say to you and since I currently feel like punching you I think I should just write them down."

Hmm, so he did want to punch me.

"I just can't let you end what we have like this. I don't know what prompted you to want to change our relationship, but, being your twin, I can venture a guess. Something must have happened that made you think that we shouldn't be together; I bet you even convinced yourself that is what is best for me. Let me tell you right now: it's not.