REMEMBER ME RIVER
CHAPTER ONE
"If two people love each other there can be no happy end to it."
-Ernest Hemingway
Her hair was perfect, as it lay on the white satin pillow, and he smiled at the attention to detail that had obviously been paid to get it that way. Her face, pale, but peaceful in repose, now, made him struggle to choke down the memory of her suffering and pain only a few days earlier. She was gone, and he wasn't yet sure how to feel about it. He was forty five years old now,had two kids in high school, and had spent the last two years watching her melt away in front of him. Those two years had been the worst of his life. He stood beside the open casket at the front of the room, staring at her face. She was gracefully posed, as if on display for the crowd that now filled the large funeral home. Murmuring voices were all around him, but he wasn't party to any of the numerous conversations. He didn't know many of these people, some were relatives he had not seen in years, others friends of his mother's he had never known at all. He looked up for a moment to see his wife across the room, handkerchief in hand, talking to his mother's sister, his Aunt Sherry, and he nodded when she caught his gaze. She smiled back, and quickly returned to her conversation.
"River?" the voice was deep and masculine. He turned around to see a tall white haired gentleman and his short silver haired wife, hands extended as if waiting for his to shake.
"I'm so sorry for your loss, son."
"Thank you." he said courteously taking the man's hand.
"I'm Bob Hopkins, and this is my wife Ellie." he said, "We knew your mom and dad, back when they first started in Real Estate, and let me tell you, your mom was...blah blah blah."
He was surprised at how quickly he had lost complete focus on the sweet senior couple in front of him, but he had heard this similar story all morning, repeated by countless Bob and Ellie's. He strained to remain in place long enough to find a point where he could excuse himself without being too rude.
"River. Come here for minute baby." his wife had seen the strain and had come to the rescue.
"Can y'all excuse us for a moment?" she smiled graciously, and wrapped an arm around her husband to lead him away.
"Oh, of course dear." said Ellie nudging her husband in the direction of the casket. "Just look Bob, she looks so peaceful." their voices trailed off.
"Thank you." he said kissing her cheek, when they found a quiet corner.
"You ok?" she asked looking up into his face.
"I think so, but I could use a drink." he smiled.
"We can go get one after this. Ok?" she touched his cheek lovingly.
"I'm thinking more than one." he grabbed her fingers and kissed her palm.
"Ok, more than one." she said before returning to the viewing crowd.
He watched her go and marveled how beautifully she filled out the curves in the black mourning dress she had on. He loved how she had her long blonde hair pulled up into a conservative looking bun in the back. Twenty years of marriage, and two kids, hadn't tampered with her figure at all. He was proud of her, and she spent a lot of his money in maintaining herself so he would always be. She faded into the crowd and he thought now would be a good time to get some air.
Stepping out into the bright mid-Summer sunlight, he took a deep breath. The air was moist compared to the cold air conditioning inside.
He stood next to the main entrance and watched as several cars turned into the funeral home parking lot. One in particular caught his attention, a dark blue, Mercedes, and he watched it as it made its way around to the back part of the funeral home parking lot, and an empty spot. He heard the engine shut off, and a sudden wave of anxiety rolled up over him, as he realized that he recognized the car.
He saw the hat first, large, floppy brimmed, and white. A delicate hand reached up to hold it in place as she opened the passenger side door.
"Aww shit." he muttered under his breath.
He knew it was her even before he could see all of her clearly.
"Aww shit, shit, shit." he repeated over and over, as the familiar quickening took his pulse, and the butterflies set in.
She turned around and opened the rear door, allowing a pudgy, apple faced, little boy to exit. Her sunglasses were large and dark, and he couldn't tell if she had seen him by the look on her face. Her dress was black, her jacket white and cropped, her long legs were dark with stockings, and ended with white pump heels. A small strand of pearls graced her long neck, and he bit his lip remembering a night he had left his mark on that neck so long ago.
"Goddamn it." he spat quietly. He felt dizzy. She had always made him feel dizzy. He felt his chest tighten and he tried to calm his breathing, as she lead the little fat boy by the hand in his direction. Soon, the driver's door opened and a huge blob of a man stepped out, pulling his dark suit pants up around his extensive belly. He coughed loudly, and farted, chuckling at her reaction.
"What?" he smiled at her, his beefy face red and sweaty already.
"My God." she snarled.
"That was funny daddy." the boy laughed.
"Your mom just don't get it, does she." he slammed the car door, and laughed again.
Hearing her voice sent a shiver up his spine. How long had it been? He couldn't recall. He steeled himself as she walked several steps in front of the blob towards the door. Her fragrance enveloped him, "cherry blossom", he remembered the name of it even now, as she stopped in front of him. He felt drunk.
"Hello River." she smiled, "Remember me? How have you been?"
"Bethany." he said hoping he didn't sound as nervous as he felt.
"I'm so sorry about Aunt Patty. I've been crying for days since I heard."
