Introduction to Sandy's Story:
"So why don't you let me tell the story?" She says.
"Because, Sandy, you don't know what happens."
"But that's exactly why I should tell it, because I don't know what happens."
"Now I'm confused, it's MY fantasy, how can you tell it if you don't know what happens?."
"Because it's MY life, isn't it? And in life we don't know what happens until it does. You're walking down a street. You turn a corner, do you run into a mugger? Or a woman who one day becomes your wife? Your wife says she wants to talk to you, does she say you're going to be a daddy? Or does she say she wants a divorce? Life is nothing but moment to moment uncertainty and doubt punctuated with moments of pure joy and abject terror."
OK so I'm half asleep and my imagination has jumped the tracks and I'm having an argument with the subject of one of my fantasies. And on top of that I appear to be losing.
"It's what makes us wish we could go back to better times." she continued. "They weren't any better, we just know how they turned out so that all the anxiety and uncertainty we felt at the time are removed. You look at the past and you're nostalgic for 'Good Old Days'. But were they really?"
"Hey, my 'Good Old Days' were fantastic." I say
"Oh really? Sure, you had some great times, you were young and strong and good looking in the way that all young people are, and you saw some amazing things. But you also saw the murder of the Kennedy's and Martin Luther King, the burning of Watts, Detroit and Newark. The Cuban missile crisis and the riots at the Democratic convention in Chicago. The Murders at Kent State."
"What about Woodstock?" I say
"What about Altamont?" She counters.
"I was there." I say.
"What about the horror of Vietnam, which you narrowly avoided? And on top of it all was the threat of Nuclear annihilation at any moment."
Wow. I, or she, was making a helluva an argument. How could an imaginary woman say things I'd never thought before.
"OK you've made your point. Yep, it's official; I'm an old guy."
"Well, you know that's not what I meant."
She settles down beside me and changes the subject
"What am I like, what kind of person am I?"
"Hmmmm."
"I mean if I'm going to tell the story..." Apparently, it's been decided.
"Well, do you remember..."
"I do if you do." she interrupts. I ignore her.
"...on the jokes page of Playboy there was this cartoon woman I think they called her the "Femlin"."
"Oh yeah, she was really cute."
"Well you're not like her."
She slaps my arm.
"Creep." she says.
"You've just turned 18 and you're kind of like 2 separate personalities. You can be very determined when you know what you want, like now." I say looking at her pointedly.