I was going to be hosting the family Christmas party this year. Which was kind of funny, considering most of the family no longer liked me.
When we made plans for it -- at the end of last year's party -- it hadn't yet become apparent just how divided we would be because of the election. And I hadn't hosted in 15 years, so it was definitely my turn.
But 2020 was a year of total chaos. First off, three older family members died of COVID before June was up. Six of us lost our jobs. And then, the election. It stirred up all sorts of raw emotions. Before we even had a chance to cast our votes, the family was split into two warring factions because of it. The result permanently severed us. Only five out of 18 people were attending this year's Christmas party. The other 13 were holed up in their places of residence, saying they would never speak to us five again, let alone attend the party.
Well, it made my life easier only having to feed five people instead of 18. I still hoped to eventually mend fences with the rest of them, but for now I had to focus on getting my house ready.
I put up the tree and the wreath, decorated, and called around to see if anyone wanted to help me cook the food. One person, my cousin Liz, volunteered. The others would merely help eat it.
The doorbell rang. I opened the door.
"Hello, Cousin Evan."
"Liz! Welcome, and thanks for coming to help."
Liz was a month younger than me. We were both 35, part of the younger generation of the family. Neither of us was romantically attached or had kids -- she couldn't, actually, due to an unfortunate event when she was younger that had traumatized her and destroyed her reproductive system. Counseling had helped her and she was long since over it, as much as you can be. She was short -- five-foot-zero -- and while not as wide as she was tall, she wasn't skinny. Her plump breasts and large, round ass were probably her best physical features, in fact. She had straight, short brown hair and brown eyes. I was tall (six-foot-one), toned, and also had short brown hair and brown eyes.
"Gladly, cuz." She gave me a hug. "You know I live out this way now? After an argument with my mom, I got a job and a place a mile from you."
I did not know that. Last I heard, Liz had been living with her family three states over.
"Well, that's cool! Even after Christmas, we can hang out."
"Sounds good. What's cooking?"
I appreciated having a woman's help. I'm not one of the chauvinists who think a woman's place is only in the kitchen or on the bed servicing her man, but Liz was an excellent chef, and being female, just had a natural instinct for noticing things I would miss. I think there's a recessive gene on the X chromosome that enables women to have perfect taste and instinctively sense what a published recipe for things -- which is what I was working off of -- is lacking.
"This recipe only calls for two cloves of garlic. Use three."
"This recipe forgot to include one teaspoon of thyme."
"This recipe calls for dicing, but chopping is better. You want the pieces large enough to have chunks for texture."
When it was done, the spread -- highlighted by a pork roast -- looked fantastic. The other three guests arrived, and the conversation flowed easily. I gave Liz full credit for improving the recipes I would have otherwise used. By the time everyone was finished eating, and dessert had been served and consumed, the mood was definitely festive. Christmas Day itself was six days away (we always have our family dinners on a Saturday, and this was the closest one before December 25), and we were all happy the year was on its way out. It had been a long year.
When the other three guests left, Liz stayed for one more glass of wine and to help me clean up.
"Thanks a ton, Liz. You didn't have to."
The wine was clearly making her a bit less inhibited.
"I wanted to, Evan. I get to spend more time admiring your body."
No, she did not just say that. She couldn't have. I must have misheard her.
"What was that?"
"You have a hunky body, cousin. I've had a crush on you for the past five years. Every family reunion, I've been looking forward to seeing you."
"Um, thanks?"
There was a rather awkward pause in the conversation as we put dishes in the dishwasher and scrubbed pots and pans. When we finished, and started running the dishwasher, Liz spoke again.
"I think I had a little too much wine to get home safely. Mind if I spend the night?"
I lay her down on the couch and gave her pillows and a blanket, then went to my bedroom and turned in.
*
When I woke, there was a pair of arms around me. What the ...?
"Hello, Evan."
Oh, right. Liz had crashed here last night. But I had left her sleeping on the sofa.
"Morning, Liz." I extracted myself from her arms and did my morning routine. Then I tossed on a shirt (I sleep topless), and started to head for the kitchen to make breakfast.
"Come back here... please."
Liz had made no move to remove herself from my bed.
"I guess breakfast can wait. I'm not particularly hungry in the mornings anyway."
That was true. I preferred a big lunch or dinner to a large breakfast.
"Same here."
I rejoined my cousin in the bed, and she immediately reached for me and held me from behind.
"I guess you weren't kidding about having a crush on me."
