I don't ever remember a time in which my cousin Megan wasn't a very special part of my life. Though she was seven years older than me and we lived about 300 miles apart, we were always very close.
Each of us was an only child and our families visited each other a few times a year. Often when her parents and mine were hanging out together, Megan and I hung out together by ourselves. And from the time Megan was 10 and I was three, she would be my sitter wherever her parents and mine went out together. I thought of her as a combination of my second mom, the sister I never had, and my best friend. As long as I can remember, each of us has always addressed the other by the same name - Buddy.
We were both shy and had only a few friends at school, but always felt completely comfortable opening up and talking to each other about everything. And because of our age difference, she taught me a lot.
When her family visited mine during Summer vacation when I was between first and second grade, my parents got a sitter for both Megan and me, never leaving the two of us alone together. I greatly missed the one on one interaction with her.
Right after Megan and her parents left, I asked my parents why they wouldn't let Megan be my sitter this time. They said they didn't want to tell me, but since I asked, they would. They explained that three months earlier, Megan and been caught with marijuana in her locker. As a result, she was arrested and expelled from school. Shortly afterward, her parents enrolled her at a Catholic school in the hope that she wouldn't have anymore bad influences.
My parents said that since Megan has done drugs, they don't trust her to be alone with me. I had been so successfully conditioned to believe that all drugs were terrible, I was disappointed in Megan. But I still loved her and desired closeness with her as much as ever. Similarly, she had been obese as long as I'd known her, yet that didn't change my feelings about her either.
The next few years, she and I still weren't allowed to be alone together, but my relationship with her deepened, especially when I got an e-mail address and my own phone and we started corresponding almost every day.
An exciting new dimension of our relationship formed when my family visited hers during my Summer vacation between sixth and seventh grade. I was 12 and Megan was 19. When my parents and I got there at about 10:00 PM, Megan's parents told me that she was at her job. She had just finished her first year of college and was working as a waitress. Shortly after arriving, I put on my pajamas, lay down on a couch in the living room, and fell asleep almost immediately. I looked forward to seeing my cousin the next day.
About 2 AM, I woke up thirsty and walked out toward the kitchen to get a glass of water. The house was completely quiet, but when I waked past the back door, I heard a slight gust of wind. I walked over to the door and was concerned to find it slightly open. I hoped that no one had broken into the house.
I peaked through the curtain and much to my pleasant surprise, I saw Megan standing on the back porch. She was wearing only a long T shirt and her back was to the door. By that time, she had reached her full adult height of 5'3" and was 230 lbs. with curly shoulder length blonde hair, blue eyes, a pale complexion, and 40 DDs. Her fat was very evenly proportioned throughout her body.
Upon my opening the door in excitement, Megan instantly jumped in fear and did a 180 in the air. When her bare soles returned to the concrete, she was facing me and her right arm was behind her back, giving me the impression that she was hiding something.
Upon seeing that it was me, her face lit up. "Hey!" she said ecstatically. With wide grins, we walked quickly toward each other and had a long, tight hug.
"Hi, Buddy!" she said.
"Good to see you!" I responded.
"Good to see you, too!" Megan then gave me a very tight squeeze, let go, and continued talking. "But hey, it's late! You better go back to bed! We'll have lots of time to hang out tomorrow!"
I almost immediately figured out why she was trying to get me to go back in the house. She looked extremely euphoric, like I'd never seen her before, and I saw smoke rising from behind her back. And within a few seconds, i smelled something very different than cigarette smoke. I figured that it was probably marijuana, especially knowing that she'd smoked it before.
Wanting to know for sure, but not wanting her to be afraid that I'd be upset with her or tell her parents, I spoke to her in a lighthearted, non-threatening manner. "What are you holding behind your back?!" I asked. She grinned, blushed, and stared down at the porch. After a few seconds, I spoke assuringly. "It's okay, Buddy; I won't tell on you! I know you smoke marijuana!"
"How do you know that?!"
"My parents told me about the time you got arrested and expelled for it!"
"Oh yeah?!"
"Yeah!"
"What do you think of that?! Do you think I'm a bad girl because I like to get massively fucked up on weed?!"
"No, you're a good girl and you're my best friend!"
"Aw, you're so sweet!" she said as we hugged again with her initiating it.
"So are you!" I responded.
Megan then let go of me and showed me that she was indeed holding a joint. "Have you ever done weed before?!" she asked.
"No!"
"How come?!"