Going on nineteen Bernie McQueen's great hope was she'd lose her virginity before she died, not expecting she'd die soon but in case she did it was best she lost her cherry before too long. When that happened it was likely she'd be a better person.
However, it was not looking promising. It had been just over eight months since a guy had taken real interest in her. That date had ended in disaster. They were groping in his mother's car, he pushed a finger into her and she peed over him and the car seats. He went insane and word got out and she landed in the 'don't touch' heap.
Bernie would be a blossoming beauty in a couple of years hence, but right now she was like many of her sex at her age, long limbed, inelegant in movement, delayed breast development, teeth not yet into shape, stringy hair and puppy fat still hanging off the ass. Not a good look really but let's not start on the guys of her age group.
Brenda her mom had offered to try to arrange family get-togethers with couples with only one son. But oh god, Bernie anticipated the outcome of that. Her mom was sexy beyond belief for a woman of her age. That explained why her father always appeared tired. The so-called potential boyfriend for Bernie would only have eyes for her mom and at the first opportunity to pounce and try to convince her mom she would gain longevity by having full-on sex with a young guy like him.
No, she couldn't allow her mom to line up a guy because if the worst happened it wouldn't be fair to her father and her mother would be forever more branded an adulteress.
Shortly after that Bernie received a huge shock. The pizza guy, a college freshman she didn't know, delivered pizza and refused to hand over the box over to Bernie and said he needed to give it to Brenda personally. Oh no. Bernie sensed what the guy wanted to give her mother. She snatched the pizza from him, gave him the money and told the guy to fuck off. When he ambled off calling her a meddling bitch Bernie opened the pizza box nervously and her heart almost stopped. The center of the pizza was left as a hole, two inches across. Until that moment she'd thought jokes about the pizza delivery guy handing across a tented pizza had been just that -- a joke. She gave her mom the benefit of the doubt. Perhaps the guy was just expecting to get lucky.
When he mom arrived from upstairs Bernie said, "I took money from your billfold for the pizza guy."
"Oh thanks darling," said her mom without missing a beat. "How does it look?"
"Okay but it has a big hole in the middle."
"Oh those young guys, all they think of is sex," her mom said mysteriously and didn't elaborate. That confused Bernie who didn't know what to say so said nothing and waited to be invited to have a piece of pizza without a guy wearing it.
Bernie was a freshman at an all-female college. She'd wanted to go to a mixed college and be banged from sunset till dawn but agreed with her parents it made sense for her to go to Belmont because it was within reasonable walking distance from home.
The male instructors were too busy being loyal to their wives or girlfriends or chasing voluptuous senior students to be interested in the likes of her and few of her girlfriends had brothers, none of whom were available. It was so frustrating.
Summer break arrived and her parents decided to tour Europe. They gave her the choice: accompany them or stay home and be given a quality pre-own car. Bernie found the idea of following her parents around Europe and not being allowed out by herself unappealing so opted for the car and accepted living with her maternal grandparents while her parents were away. It had the makings of the lousiest summer ever... but then came reprieved.
The phone went. It was her mom's youngest sister Louie.
"Oh hi Aunt Louie."
"You are at college now darling and am I'm with one foot in your generation and one in your mother's so to speak, so it's Louie or Louisa to you from now on."
"Mom will have a fit."
"See what I mean, old people are so conservative. Put her on and I'll fix it."
Bernie's own phone went and it was one of her best friends so she went off for fifteen minutes to talk about nothing. When she returned she found her mom waiting, smiling.
"You're in luck Bernie. Your aunt and uncle want to stay here for a week so you've been invited to stay here with them. That means grandma will have you only for the first five days.
"Oh god, I'm so lucky," Bernie trilled. Her mom grinned and told her to watch her mouth.
* * *
Bernie arrived at her home and Louie raced out to greet her.
"Oh my, nice wheels," Louie said as they kissed.
"Yeah, dad bought it for me in compensation for not going to Europe with them."
"Hotel rooms in Europe and especially pensions often have very thin walls darling and your parents wouldn't wish you to hear the bedsprings rattling every night."
"Every night? My parents would only do it once a month, wouldn't they?"