Rachel woke up in her bed. Her head rose to the sunlight peaking through her curtain. Within seconds she could feel a thirst in her mouth, dehydration, a mild headache, fatigue and aches in her body. She was certainly hung over from the wine, but was smiling in light of her wonderful night that had just occurred with her father.
She steadily and sluggishly got out of bed, with the intent to go the kitchen, prepare plenty of coffee, water and food to shake off this hang over.
In the living room, she found Scott sitting on the sofa, dressed and head down in his phone. âGood morningâ she called out with a glowing smile. Silence. Scott coldly didnât reply or even move, prompting Rachel to continue her walk into the kitchen.
She gathered ingredients: eggs, bread, butter, yoghurt, cereal, honey⌠slam! The front door went crashing shut, startling Rachel, invoking a sudden feeling of confusion. Scott was gone without a word. What followed was a quiet and long morning by herself in the kitchen, as she ate and drank alone, slowly recuperating her energy and sense of balance. She ate, she drank, she watched the news.
Picking up her phone, she texted to Scott âis everything ok?â All that was left was to clear up the washing from last nightâs dinner: forks, spoons, wine glasses, plates and throw away the empty bottles. As the day went on, Rachel couldnât shake the feelings uncertainty and restlessness. No amount of comedy from a movie could make her laugh, no entertainment or activity could distract and hold her attention throughout the afternoon, desperate to enjoy her day.
For the evening, she had her dinner alone. She later went to the kitchen window where she watched the sunset as the dusking sky settled into night. Again, she could not shake the feelings of anxiety and apprehension that remained with her throughout the whole day. The next day, she headed for her shift at work. As she waited tables, took orders and carried plates, her mind was distant and was further exasperated by how long and lonely the day felt. A colleague, even her manager, noted to her that she seemed glum and was missing her usually perkiness and sunny attitude.
When confronted by her concerned colleagues, Rachel could do nothing but shrug and say that âeverythingâs fine.â She had no strength in her body or mind to make excuses or even realise herself why she felt so depressed.
Returning home, Rachel expected to be alone again. She tiredly stumble into the living, only to be startled by the presence of her father. He was standing clothed, arms crossed and scowling. She froze at the sight of him, felt tense and scared. Silence. Deep down, she knew all along why this silence and loneliness was building up over the last two days and it could only mean one thing⌠he was angry at her, and it was now time to face that fury.
âIâm disappointed in you, Rachel. I am shocked and appalled. You deliberately took advantage of me and youâve crossed a line. How on earth could you let this happen? When you told me you wanted to be a nudist, I didnât think for a second that you were capable of this. What you did was wrong, perverted and disgusting. Did you ever stop to think of the consequences? Think about it⌠Would you ever forgive me if this had happened the other way around? I canât even look at you. Weâre gonna have to rethink this arrangement and reassess my trust in you if you want to be living under this roof. If you want to be treated like an adult, then I expect you to conduct yourself with maturity and responsibility, and last night, youâve shown me you cannot be trusted. Go. Get out.â
Rachel slowly walked to her room. Her legs were shaking as the shock of Scottâs words had nestled deep inside her. The closer she got to her bedroom, the stronger her emotions were beginning to take over. As she reached for the door handle, she covered her mouth as tears immediately rolled down her eyes. Inside, she shut the door behind her, let out her wails into her hand. She collapsed and slid down against the wall, sitting weakly on the floor, crying in silence.
She eventually stood up and walked towards her dresser. In the mirror, she could see her eyes were red, puffy and she could not lift her face into a smile. Her body felt greasy, was sweaty from the dayâs work, her skin sticking to her uniform and she became conscious of her body odour. She had never felt so repulsive and so unattractive in her entire life. Filled with disgust and self loathing.
She opened her bedroom window to circulate some fresh air. Closing her eyes, shutting herself off to what she was seeing, Rachel shed off her clothes, picked up a towel and made her way through the quiet house to the bathroom. She let the shower run hot for several minutes, listening to the sound of running water and feeling the humidity filling up the bathroom. It was almost as if she could imagine she was in another place, somewhere far away, tropical and exotic. A place she could feel free, comfortable and with reason to smile. She stepped into the shower and felt the warm embrace of the water, instantly feeling all of her sweat rinse off and felt cleansed. After a blissful fifteen minutes of cleansing and exfoliating in a hot waterfall, she finally awoken from her zombie like trance and back into life. âHmmm⌠dĂŠjĂ vu.â
Returning to her room, Rachel felt a sense calmness and healing. As her warm body began to dry, she traced her fingers on her chest, down her to stomach and placed her hands on her hips. She felt heavenly and like her normal self again. As her mind wandered to her father, she took a sharp intake of breath and her chest tightened. She had found not only her confidence, but also her strength. The strength to say her mind and stand her ground. It was time to confront Scott.
Without a stitch of clothing, she marched to the living room where Scott sat. As he noticed his defiant, naked daughter, Scottâs faced twitched into an expression of restrained anger and disgust. Rachel suddenly felt pangs of doubt and anxiety; thoughts telling her to walk away and to stop being so foolish. How could she stand up to her father? Like a knight with no armour, no sword or shield, facing off against a dragon, it seemed like a hopeless fight.
âDad, Iâm sorry if I hurt you. I never meant for things to get out of hand like this. But I am deeply sorry. I donât want you to feel uncomfortable because youâre too important to me. I love being nude and I am not giving this up. It has made me free, comfortable, happy and confident in myself in ways I never couldâve imagined. You have understood this about me from the beginning, and when weâre together, it makes it feel the more special.