The Laugh Trac

This is a submission to the

Literotica April Fools Story Contest 2025

. All characters are more than 21 years old.

Tags: Anal, Oral Sex, Domination, Mom, Sister, Teacher, Television, Actors, Free Use, Exhibitionist, Harem, Collar, APRIL FOOLS 2025

This story takes a bit of time to get to the incest, but the section it is posted to is not the April Fools joke. Have a sexy and unnerving April Fools.

=COLD OPEN=

"Hello?" Caleb answered the phone warily. An unknown number calling on April first was rarely good. Tax scams and pranksters abounded. He half expected a question about how fast his refrigerator was running or a giggling warning that his mom was on fire.

A woman's voice came over the line. Tinny, like she was speaking through another device or the call was going through old wires with less signal density. But also

musical

, like every syllable had been assigned a note. It was like he was talking to an old timey wind up music box. "Am I speaking to Caleb, twenty-eight years old, brown hair, oldest of three children?" It

was

a technically correct description of him.

Never having been described in

precisely

those terms, it took him a moment to decide whether to agree that this was the case. "Um... yes. I suppose I am. What's this about?"

There was a tinkle of laughter over the line. "We are interested in your demographic, and would like to show you the pilot episode of a television show and collect your responses. If you watch the show and complete the survey, we'll send you some complimentary hair gel and you would be entered and may win something from the show." Something about the wording seemed off to him.

Generally it was a good assumption that if a contest didn't mention the odds of winning that you had a better chance of being struck by lightning. Further, if the

prize

wasn't mentioned, it wasn't worth mentioning. Ignoring the presumably ephemeral winnings, Caleb asked the really important question: "What kind of hair gel are we talking?" He wasn't sure what the correct amount of hair product to be using was anymore. In the early naughties, which had been called the two thousands at the time, he had known that a man in his twenties should use enough hair gel to comply with motorcycle helmet laws, but he was a child at the time and that knowledge did him no good. Now that he could see the big three-oh in the middle distance, he was completely adrift. He blamed the collapse of MTV. In a world of Tubers and Tockers, it was very hard to know whether one's hairstyle was fashionable or not.

"It's a medium hold, long lasting gel that is used on the sets of movie and television productions." The woman's voice tinkled out of his phone, reminding him that he had actually asked a question out loud. She explained how to watch the show, which was that it was on one of the really high numbered stations that normally had home shopping from Dubai or just nothing at all. "When you've watched the show, we'll call you back and get your responses. Then you can be entered." He set the station number on his TV, and indeed the show was just beginning.

"Peach Valley County

High

" was the name of the show, at least if the title screen was to be believed. The opening song was a bit of meandering pop punk, electric guitars played spunkily but without malice. The words were lost on him, but various characters appeared across the screen, often seen from behind. Whether they were from the front or the back, Caleb couldn't hazard a guess as to which,

if any

, of the characters were supposed to be students at the titular PVC High-School. All of the people displayed seemed to be very obviously between their mid twenties and their early thirties except one guy who was maybe in his early fifties. Intellectually he knew that actors who played teenagers in movies and television shows had mostly left their teenage years behind years ago, but the people in the credits didn't seem to put any effort into pretending otherwise. The women and all but one of the men seemed attractive, but they were clearly adult women and men.

The show started, and it took a while for Caleb to determine that it was supposed to be taking place in a high-school. The actors dressed like college students or even like people who had graduated from university and joined the workforce. They didn't talk about classes, or club activities, or the successes and failures of their sportsball teams, or even their hopes and fears for

after

high-school. Caleb was probably ten minutes into the show before anyone even

mentioned

something related to them nominally being in a school. What did come out of their mouths was mostly insults. And the laugh track

loved

insults.

"Because you're a spaz?"

Ha ha kweh kweh heh ho heh ha

"You dress like all your taste is in your mouth!"

Ha ha kweh kweh heh ho heh ha

"Going out with him would be a cry for help!"

Ha ha kweh kweh heh ho heh ha

The laugh track responded to people saying mean things as if they were punchlines. It was obviously intended as a comedy, but many of the rejoinders weren't especially witty, but merely cruel. The cruelty was considered hilarious enough. And oddly, people didn't seem to get that upset. Someone would say something sadistically insulting, the laugh track would have its giggles, and then the victim would at most make a funny face before everything carried on as if nothing had happened. But in addition to the attempts at verbal humor, there was also

physical

humor, at least of a rudimentary sort. People got stuff in the face. Mud, ink, milk, spaghetti sauce, all right in the face. But not

all over

the face, because every splash or slop to the face seemed to miraculously avoid rounds area all around both eyes. Almost exactly like they'd been wearing protective goggles when splashed and then the goggles were removed prior to being filmed in closeup. People also got touched on the butt.

Caleb was not unappreciative of seeing attractive women get touched on the butt. The contrivances for

why

various poles, pokers, and hands would find themselves nestled up into the rear ends of the actresses were fairly under written, but the real draw was obviously having the camera zooming in on the rear ends of sexy actresses. The reactions of the characters were fairly odd. Every time a woman got a hand on their ass for some reason or another, they spent the entire time with their eyes bulging and their mouths open. It was an expression of exaggerated shock, and maybe a deniable amount of arousal as well. It seemed like comedy from another era entirely, the kind of broad and goofy expressions that stage actresses would use to emote to the people in the back.

Ha ha kweh kweh heh ho heh ha

In any case, the laugh track found it hilarious. And after it was over, the women merely said something cutting and then everyone moved on as if no one had just been sexually harassed. It was all set up like a burlesque from generations ago. Was this what the kids wanted these days? They had said they wanted his opinion for his

demographics

, and no one from

his

generation had needed attractive women to pretend at surprise and offense while being fondled nor did they require the fondlers to pretend that everything was an innocent mistake while winking at the audience. That kind of ribaldry thrived under the omnipresent eye of explicit censorship regimes, and Caleb couldn't even remember a time when actual pornography wasn't available online.

What Caleb found most unnerving was the character in the show

named

Caleb. He was one of the members of the main family, and seemed to be played by a man in his late twenties. A man who looked very much like Caleb himself, although with better skin and hair because he was an actor who had access to a makeup department. The on-screen Caleb character had two younger sisters who seemed to be in their mid twenties. They seemed to share classes with Caleb, so maybe they were supposed to be the same age, despite being "younger" sisters? They had a mother who was played by a smoking hot actress who couldn't have been older than thirty-two. Only the dad broke the mold, as he was played by an aging comedian of dwndling social relevance. Caleb felt like he should recognize the actor playing the father, but couldn't quite place him.

Oooh!oooWoooo!oooh!

The scandalized excitement of the studio audience, or at least the canned facsimile thereof, had been provoked by a big open-mouthed kiss. What had brought on the kiss, Caleb wasn't really sure. A man and a woman had been exchanging verbal barbs not unlike every other social interaction that had occurred so far in the show, but instead of having a laugh track play and then moving on, the man pulled her into a giant theatrical kiss. Then the woman melted into him and they started hungrily tongue dueling while the audience reacted with cheers. It made Caleb confused as to why the sounds for prurient thrills didn't play when women were being butt touched. Hurrahs and fainting salts were handed around for a

kiss

, but not for groping a woman's ass. Even if in the context of the show the groping was supposed to be an 'accident,' it still seemed like the laugh track should be treating it as the sexier event than a slobbery kiss.

The end of the show came before Caleb had been expecting it, and then his phone rang again. "So, what did you think of Peach Valley County High?" The musical voice rang out from his phone's speakers, although it still sounded like the voice's owner was very far away.

It was of course the question that Caleb had spent the entire show trying to come up with an answer to. "Honestly, I don't think this show is

for

me." He said non-noncommittally. He didn't much like it when someone criticized things that were simply aimed at other people. When someone complained about a kid's show being too childish or a romcom being too sappy, he just wanted to slap them in the face. He was happy to let the kids watch stuff he'd outgrown, and reserved his fiercest barbs for things he actually liked. Which was mostly crime dramas. And here he was, being asked to be

that guy

, and it made him more uncomfortable than he had expected.

The musical voice had a musical laugh. "Oh, I highly doubt

that

. But what specifically did you have issue with in the show?" When neither of them were talking, the line had a faint '

kssssh

' sound. It was familiar to Caleb, but he hadn't heard it in a phone connection for a long time.

Cornered, he attempted to justify his opinion with specific examples. "Well, it seems like there are a lot of continuity errors. Characters will be wearing different clothes and be totally unaffected by events that seemingly just happened. Like, obviously I

know

that scenes aren't filmed in the order they appear in the show. But it makes it weirdly obvious when characters have ink vanish from their faces or change shirt colors within a school day." He thought about it some more. "And what's up with Caleb's family? Like, how

old

are they supposed to be? His sisters look like they're as old as mine are, and my youngest sister hasn't been in high-school for six years. And his mom seems like she's thirty, but she has three kids who all look like they are in their twenties." None of the characters had mentioned her being a step-mom, and Caleb literally could not think of another explanation.

"The characters are old enough." The voice said it enigmatically, but with a subtle hint that the mouth speaking the words was smirking while saying so. "So, would you say that you would prefer it if Peach Valley County High seemed

more real

to you?" The voice stressed the hypothetical more than was probably necessary.

"Huh. Yeah, if you could do that, I think I would." He could almost hear the smile on the other end of the phone connection.

==

WIPE

==

Ha ha kweh kweh heh ho heh ha

Caleb heard the laugh track, the sounds came from a direction he had difficulty imagining. He had lost his phone and his apartment, but he had also found himself standing in a classroom. The classroom was huge, and the number of desks was small. Like a set... for a TV show... fuck. There were other people in the room, and they seemed vaguely familiar. Like he'd seen them on TV, maybe even

exactly

like that. Because he had just seen them on TV. In Peach Valley County High. He looked all over the place, and while he got no answers, he did get more questions. When he moved his head quickly, he could see into another room out of the corner of his eye. The other room was dark, and there were people in chairs. People who were watching. He couldn't see them in much detail, because they were visible only for a flash and only out of his peripheral vision, but they were there. They were watching.

"Caleb," a man in his late twenties called out to him. He had perfectly combed hair and wore khakis and a polo shirt, "your head is spinning like a lawn mower. Did someone replace the motor in your neck?" Caleb looked at the man, was his name Charles? And how did

he

know his name was Caleb?

Ha ha kweh kweh heh ho heh ha

He spun around again, fast enough to see the audience in motion. To catch them in the act. They were laughing. More than a dozen of them, all laughing. All making the sounds that he heard every time. The laugh track was people, and those people were

right there

, but in a direction that he could see but never face. He figured that he probably looked like an insane person swinging his head around, but he didn't know what else to do. A bell rang, and the other people started making their way to desks. Caleb had no idea which desk was supposed to be his, so he waited for other people to claim desks before he sat down. Someone said something to him, but he wasn't paying attention.

Ha ha kweh kweh heh ho heh ha

Whipping his head around, he confirmed that the audience was laughing again. The laugh track sounded identical, but the chuckles and guffaws of the people watching him seemed to be visually different. He didn't know what that meant. On the other hand, the laugh track had gone off after someone had said something to him. Which meant that the thing that was said to him was probably insulting. He rolled his eyes and ignored it, which seemed to fit the PVC High experience. The other people seemed to think that was expected behavior.

The teacher came in, and she was a knockout. Long brown hair, a ridiculously slinky pencil skirt, and horn rim glasses that were obviously a stylish accessory more than a vision aid. When she walked in her four-inch heels, her tight calves, firm thighs, and grabbable butt sashayed with every step. The skirt was pulled tight against her rear, and left little to the imagination as to the tanga underwear that was contained within. Her white blouse was buttoned up all the way, but it was sheer enough that her black bra could be inferred right through the light fabric. A modest blouse only in the technical sense. She looked to be about his age, or maybe a little younger. The overall appearance was that of a woman wearing a sexy teacher

costume

, which was probably exactly what she was. Everyone seemed to know her, and it was quite a while into class before he was able to nail down that her name was Miss Fox.

While he was trying to wrap his mind around the teacher, one of the women in class turned to him and taunted. "Whatcha staring at, Caleb? Afraid she's gonna

call

on you again?" It broke him out of his reverie, but he also did not understand the context of what had been asked. He thought it was nonsense, only the tone conveying the intended disdain. The omnipresent yet mostly invisible audience did not agree, and found it hilarious.

Ha ha kweh kweh heh ho heh ha

The class itself was utter insanity, like if textbooks had been sent through a meat grinder and then reconstituted. Facts were blurted out about math, physics, computer science, chemistry,

and

geography. Caleb struggled to wrap his mind around what the

subject

of the class was, and he came up blank. As far as he could tell, he was in the class that one goes to when having a nightmare about being back in school. He hoped that didn't mean he was about to take a test he hadn't studied for or have to go up in front of the class naked, those were the parts of those dreams he hated the most. But while the scenario was dreamlike, everything

felt

physically real. He carefully brought his arm up to his face and touched his red sleeve to his tongue. It

tasted

real, and Caleb couldn't remember a single dream he'd ever had where he had a sense of taste. "Well,

someone

can't wait for lunch!"

Ha ha kweh kweh heh ho heh ha

The woman who had taunted him for tasting his sleeve simply turned back to the front of the class. None of the people in the room had so much as cracked a smile at the mockery. The people in the audience, the ones who were safely out of reach, had given the same cruel chortling they always did, but the people who Caleb could face had nothing to add. The insult simply went out into the world, and only the laugh track acknowledged that it had happened at all.

Caleb needed to figure out what was going on. He needed to get out, get back to his life. He had work on... what time

was

it? It had been the evening of Tuesday, April First when he was shown the episode of PVC High, what was the time and date now? If classes were going on, did that mean that it was already Wednesday? Was he missing work for this? With his phone missing, he wondered if he was getting angry phone calls from his work. Well, he obviously wasn't

getting

any phone calls from work, but like, he wondered if they were trying to reach him. Or if anyone else was. Last he knew it was a Tuesday, so no one

except

people at his job were likely to notice his absence for several days. It was a depressing thought, he'd been kidnapped into a voyeuristic and underwritten sitcom, and the only people who were going to miss him were people who wanted to exploit his ability to file paperwork. No, if he was going to get out of his predicament, he was going to need to figure out his own escape.

"Caleb?" The teacher's voice cut through his introspection. "Perhaps you'd like to solve this on the board?" She waved to a chalkboard. As he walked up to the front of the class, that anachronism bothered him most of all. What schools used

chalk

boards rather than white boards or tablets. It was like he was walking into the twentieth century.

When he got up close, he was struck by the resemblance that Miss Fox had to a woman who worked in his office. Her name was... Dana? Something like that, she wasn't a woman that he had much to do with. She had a cubicle quite far from Caleb's, and she always jetted out the moment lunch started. He didn't know where she went for food, but she definitely wasn't brown bagging it like Caleb. He wasn't sure why he'd thought of that woman at all, because while he

saw

her every day, he did not

know

her at all. Dana, or whatever her name really was, might as well have been a woman on a billboard. He doubted that she knew his name either.