Utter Love

Jill barely knocked before she entered Jake's room, "Have you been into my underwear?"

Jake was curled on his bed, reading a magazine. He didn't look up, "Of course, I'm a man."

"A boy."

Jake laughed, "When it comes to women's underwear, it's the same thing."

"Why?"

Jake looked at his sister and was relieved to see that she really wasn't angry so much as just ticked. "Well, have you looked at ours? They're boring. Yours, though. They're soft, delicate, colourful. They're pretty and sexy, that's why men love them. And anyway, I haven't been into your underwear. They were there, I admired them and I put them on your bed, not a big deal."

Jake's reasonable and unaffected answer made Jill feel a little silly, so she turned and left the room.

...

During the past few years, the two hours between when they both got home from school and when their parents got home from work had always been a quiet time for the sister and brother. They rarely spoke to each other before supper, never at any length, but with the underwear incident that changed. It was as if the panties created a shared experience, a shared intimacy that had to be explored.

Jill was in first year at the local community college while Jake was finishing his final year at high school. Youth had been an awkward time for both of them, for a number of reasons.

First, while their parents were very religious, both siblings were indifferent and their resistance to their parent's beliefs created an ever-widening gulf between them.

Second, neither Jill nor Jake were particularly attractive. They weren't ugly, it's just that their bits and pieces were fixed at odd angles, making them both 'near misses.' But neither was worried about it. They had seen early pictures of their mother and while they looked like she did in her youth, a near miss, they could expect to look like she did as a mature adult, stunningly attractive.

Third, neither sister or brother were joiners, both would rather spend time alone then suffer the fools of convention, and this led to the fifth reason why youth had been difficult: both were no-nonsense individuals, more interested in what could be, then what is.

So all in all, youth had been a lonely time for both, neither had many friends and neither had ever enjoyed a romantic interest. But, that said, both were responsible and mature and were poised to blossom in their adult years.

The knock was louder the next day when Jill came into Jake's room. "Do you have a moment?"

"Of course," Jake spun around from his computer and motioned his sister to sit on the bed, "is it about the panties?"

Jill laughed, "No, I decided not to bring that up again ... Although I don't get it."

Jake shrugged his shoulder without a trace of embarrassment, "Nor do I, but if every man does it, who am I to resist."

"But 'does' what exactly?" This had been bothering Jill for the past 24 hours. She could understand that underwear was like lingerie, designed to entice, but entice the female body, not attract attention to itself. What did men actually do with panties?

"Look at them, feel the material and ... hey, don't freak, but, maybe, sniff them."

"You're kidding?" Jill's eyes were wide with fascination.

"Hey, it's what we do."

Jill was trying hard to understand. "Do you do it with mum's, too?"

For the first time Jake showed discomfort, "I used to, but I don't any more."

"Just mine."

Jake shrugged.

"Do you masturbate with them?"

Jake gave an exaggerated smile.

Jill laughed, more a laugh of surprise then humour, then she got to her feet, "Well, live and learn," she said with a laugh as she walked to the door, but once there she remember why she had come, "Do you want to go to a movie Friday night?"

...

Jake was fidgeting 10 minutes into the film. He hated chick flicks and his sister knew it, that's why she took his hand, squeezed it, and whispered in his ear, "Sorry, I honestly didn't know." But when she sat back in her seat she didn't let go of his hand, nor did he let go of hers.

There's a lot to think about when you're sitting in a blackened theatre for an hour and a half during a really boring film while holding your sister's hand. You start by wondering why you have a growing hard on and it kind of goes from there. Physically connected as you are, you think of all the good things about the person you're with, and Jake was flooded with good thoughts and memories of his sister.

They had never been particularly close, always preferring independence to close friendship, but they had always been fiercely supportive of each other; they had a bond that both knew would last forever; a bond based on respect: both had total confidence in the other, confident that the other would consistently make the right decisions. That's why the hand-holding seemed so natural: if they both wanted to stay connected, it must be right.

When the lights came on and they left their seats Jake brushed by his sister's large tub of popcorn and noted that it hadn't been touched.

...

They were in the car now. "Coffee?"

"Sure, as long as we don't have to discuss the film."

Jill was driving but stole a glance at her brother. "Bad wasn't it."

"I don't know, I tuned out at the first kiss."

The cups were before them. "I wonder how many brothers and sisters are out on a date on Friday night?"

Jake laughed, "Is this a date?"

"You know what I mean," Jill took a sip from her coffee.

Jake looked around the busy coffee shop, "Probably lots."

"Why didn't you let go of my hand?"

The question blindsided Jake, all he could think of saying was, "Why didn't you?"

Jill smiled, "I don't know, I asked myself that question a hundred times during the movie." She hesitated a moment before adding, "I enjoyed it."

"The movie?"

"Holding your hand."

"So did I."

...

On Monday, Jake was on his bed reading when Jill knocked and walked in. He noticed she appeared nervous; she hesitated for just a moment before sitting on the end of his bed.

The silence was unusually awkward, then Jill said, "Did you think any more about it?" When she saw his confusion she quickly added, "that hand holding."

Jake smiled, "Yes, I wondered why we hadn't done it before."

As Jill considered what she was going to say, Jake sat up and reached over to take Jill's hand and as he lay back, he pulled her gently over to him so they could hold hands comfortably. Jill looked at the hands clasped together and said, "How did it make you feel?"

"Like we were close, closer then we have ever been," then he added, because he would have felt like a cheater if he didn't, "I got a hard on."

But Jill didn't seem to hear the confession. "You made me feel really special, Jake."

Jake gave a contemptuous snicker, "I think we're both very horny."

When Jill turned on her brother she let his hand go, "Is that what you think this is about?"

Jake shrugged and smiled, unfazed by his sister's anxiety, "Partly. We both care about each other but if I was regularly fucking Betty Sue or Alice Ann or whomever and you were getting laid by Buck, Stud, or Well Hung, I don't think we'd have been holding hands, never mind talking about it."

Jill got up from the bed and was about to walk away when Jake grabbed her hand and pulled her back down. "Come on, Jill, don't get mad, I just said what I thought was true."

As soon as Jill sat on the bed she turned to Jake, "Will you hold me?"

Jake sat up and pulled her close to him, with his hands around her.

She spoke into his neck, "You're right, aren't you? We are horny." Then she asked a question she had long wondered about, "Do you have any experience with women?"

"Zip. You?"

"Just with Becky and Ann," she laughed, "no none, not even a kiss."

"Do you want your first?"

When she spoke her voice was weak but certain, "Yes."

Jake gently and carefully placed his lips on his sister's, almost in a caress, but he left them there and gently moved his lips along her's waiting for a response, waiting for encouragement.

It came in her little nibbles, in her parted mouth, in her slight, guttural moans so he applied more pressure and sucked in her lower lip, gently biting on it, all along its length, and when he sucked at the corner of her mouth he let out his own soft moan and then broke away, pulling his sister to him, pulling her head into the nap of his neck, "God, Jill, that was fantastic."

Jill pushed away from her brother, got to her feet and when she looked down at him she smiled and left the room.

...

Jake's door was wide open when Jill walked through it the next day after school.

When Jake saw her he said, "The two perverts meet again."

"Do you think we're perverts?" There was genuine alarm in his sister's voice.

"Oh, I don't know, maybe. I don't care."

"Nor do I," she said as she sat on the end of the bed.

"Do you think it was wrong, the hand holding, the kiss?"

Jill smiled and shrugged her indifference to the question.

Jake thought for a minute, "It didn't feel wrong."

"No, it didn't, did it?" Jill studied her brother for almost a full minute before adding, "But, then, I wasn't thinking of you as my brother."

And for the first time, Jake wasn't thinking of this girl on the edge of his bed as his sister, either. She seemed a different person now. This girl he had known all his life, a girl who had grown from an irritant, to a competitor, to a friend was now a, what? He didn't know; he knew only that their relationship was changing and he could see in her excited eyes that it was changing for her, too.

He got up and sat on the bed beside his sister and looked down at his hands, "There is something strange going on here, isn't there?"

"Yes." Her hands were on the bed at her sides and she seemed to be looking at her knees.

"Are you scared?"

"Yes."

"So am I, but I'm excited, too."

"Would you hold me again?" After she said the words she looked up at him for his reaction.

He moved closer to her and tried to put his arms around her, but it was physically awkward, awkward for them both so Jill fell back on the bed and pulled her brother with her so they lay side by side with their feet hanging over the side while they both wondered what to do next. They lay that way for a minute when Jill turned her face to her brother, "Will you touch me, Jake?" And she took his hand and put it on her breast.

With his hand on his sister's breast Jake turned and rested his head on a hand propped up by his elbow and he watched his fingers dance along her sweater. When she pressed her hand against his fingers he shoo-ed them away and continued his almost casual exploration, then when he pulled at her sweater she sat up so he could pull it off and she settled back down covered only in a thin, rose coloured bra with her nipples straining in prominence. Jake kissed both nipples, then lay a cheek against one, feeling her heat and smelling her hot skin, "You're beautiful, Jill."

"Take it off, Jake." And she sat up so he could put his arms around her but when he did, he didn't know how to unfasten her bra so she took it off herself and when she did, her eyes searched his looking for his reaction as he stared at her chest. "Do you like them, Jake?"

Jake fixed on the stiff nipples, "Oh, God, Jill, yes, they're so beautiful."

"Touch them, Jake, feel them." And she pushed her chest towards him in encouragement.

He turned on the bed, curling a leg up so he could face her comfortably and when he gently lifted both breasts she leaned forward and kissed him lightly on the lips, "Oh, Jake."

But Jake pulled back, fascinated with her tits, studying them. They were large, very white and very round with big dark areolas, the colour of mahogany he thought, and thick nipples stiff with excitement. He flicked at the them with his thumbs, "How does that feel?"

She leaned into him again, resting her head on his shoulder, her eyes were closed. "Oh, Jake, it just feels so great having you hold them."

He flicked at her nipples again, "Are these sensitive?"

"I'm sensitive, Jake, my whole body is on fire."

Jake kissed his sister's hair, "Can I suck them?"

She pulled back, smiled and put her hands on his head, and when she pulled him to her she lay back on the bed and he was kneeling over her with his lips pressed to a breast, sucking noisily.

She pushed at his leg, encouraging him to lie down and when he did, she pulled his head to her chest and moved a breast to his mouth, "Gently, Jake, suck me gently, nurse on me," and she stroked his hair and her little moans seemed almost a purr.

And he did, he nursed on his sister's breast for a few minutes, often moaning, often licking and biting gently, then he said, "Jill?" When he spoke the nipple fell from his mouth and lay wet on her ribs, touching his lips.

"Hmmmm?" she reached for her breast to ease it back in his mouth.

"Do you mind if I masturbate?"

Jill moved quickly, shifting away from him, "Oh, no, Jake, no. Please. Can I help?"

He pulled her back down and put his head back on her chest the way it had been and he fumbled with his pants. "Hold it in my mouth, Jill, let me suck on it, it feels so great, it tastes so great."

She fed her tit to him and began caressing his hair again, "What does it taste like?"

Jake's pants were undone and his underwear pushed down under his balls and his hand was stroking very slowly, "Like you," he mumbled, inaudibly, then he struggled to his knees, and as his mouth found her breast again he sucked frantically and then let out a long groan as his hand pumped a stream of cum onto his sister's pants.

His hand stopped now and his face was between her breasts when he pulled his hands up to squeeze her tits into his cheeks, feeling the warmth, feeling the intimacy, feeling her arms around him.

He kneeled like that for more then a minute, his ass in the air, his face between her tits, his hands pressing her to his face and when he finally looked up at her, a jolt of pleasure ran through him, but it was a jolt of pain, too. She was looking at him with so much passion, so much tenderness, so much love in her eyes that he fell onto the bed beside her with a mixture of excitement and confusion.

"Oh, Jake," she said, as she slipped out from under him and got to her feet, "you can't know what you mean to me," and when she bent down to kiss him, her hand felt his wetness on her pants and she moaned into his mouth.

...

She leaned against the door jam and looked at him, "I didn't sleep much last night, Jake."

Jake laughed, "How could you, what with me rolling around in your bed mauling you."

Jill joined in his laughed, but there was little humour in it, "In my dreams I was in your bed, Jake and I was mauling you."

They were quiet for a moment, they just looked at each other, then Jake got up and led his sister to sit on the bed and he sat down beside her. "I don't know about this, Jill."

When she looked at him there was so much hunger in her eyes that his doubt vanished and he put his hand on her cheek and kissed her, at the same time pulling her into him.

"Don't let me go, Jake."

And he didn't, they sat for a long time on the bed in an almost desperate embrace until Jake fell back on the bed and his sister followed on top of him. She looked down into his eyes for a moment and then kissed him, four or five times, lightly, then she pulled back, "I want this Jake."

"Yes," and he pulled her into his arms with all his strength, then he released her slowly and pushed her onto her back, "But we must go slowly."

"Why?"

"I don't want this to traumatize you ... or me, for that matter. We have to know what we're doing ... so we don't have any regrets."

"How slow is slow?" When Jake bent down to kiss his sister she took his hand and placed it on her breast. "Feel me again, Jake, please, touch me."

He put his hand under her sweater and felt the heat of her breast through the thin film of her bra. She was already stiff with excitement. "I was in your bed this morning, at four o'clock I had my lips on your tit and I was sucking like a baby through your bra."

Jill corrected her brother, "At four this morning I didn't have any clothes on Jake and nor did you and I was here with you."

"No, no, you did, but you didn't have pants on," and he quickly pulled off her sweater and as she undid her bra he unbuckled her belt, unzipped her zipper and slowly pulled off her pants leaving her only in her white cotton panties. "Yes," said Jake, as he let his eyes travel along her long slender legs that disappeared into the slim white panties, "this was it and I never got back to sleep."

"What did you do, Jake?"

"I kissed you and touched you and instead of counting sheep, I counted my lucky stars."

"Is that all you did?"

Jake smiled, "No, I wanked."

"Oh, God, Jake, did you? I did, too."

"And I want to do it again."

"Now?"

"Yes, and you, too."

"Together?"

Jake nodded as he undid his pants, "It's what I imagined we did last night. At first, we did other things, but they felt wrong, so in my thoughts I wrote and rewrote the scene until my final fantasy: you were in your panties and then we agreed to masturbate with each other, I couldn't get it out of my mind."

She leaned up on her arm and looked at him while she traced a finger around his mouth, "What did you see, Jake, tell me?"

He leaned in to her and kissed her and left his face close to hers, not wanting to see her embarrassment and when he spoke he mumbled the words into her skin, "You had your legs open and your fingers were in you and it was the most exotic sight I have ever seen."

But she wasn't embarrassed, instead, she pushed down her panties and kicked them off, "Would you kiss me first?"

When Jake moved his body closer to hers he gently put his lips on hers and they kissed as before, tentatively but with increasing passion and when Jake pulled away, Jill remained where she was, with her lips open and her eyes closed.

"That was wonderful, Jake."

Jake pushed his sister down and as he lay down beside her he pushed his pants and underwear down, kicked them off and gripped his excited cock, laughing mirthlessly, "This isn't going to take long."

Jill had her eyes close to Jake's shoulders and they both had their legs over the end of the bed. "I can't see you, Jake."

He sprang up on the bed to his knees and helped his sister up to lean against the headboard while he stacked his two pillows so he could lean opposite her. Her legs were over his, he had his hand around his penis as if trying to control it, she had a hand on her stomach. "Oh, God Jake, this is just so unbelievable. If I touch myself I'll cum in an instant."

Jake studied his sister for a full minute. Her brown eyes were wide in excitement, her long, thin nose prominent over a thin, sensual mouth and a strong rounded chin. Light brown hair fell to her strong wide shoulders and her large, rounded breasts with their rigid nipples spilled against her narrow ribs. Then he looked lower, at the long fingers light on her stomach, just above her wispy patch of dark brown hair, so stark against the smooth white of her inner thighs. Then he looked up at her: it wasn't her loving eyes that made him say it, it was her innocent confidence at sitting in front of him, with her legs wide apart and her fingers moving into her patch, "I had no idea you are so beautiful, Jill." Then he added, "And thank God I didn't or I never would have made it through grade 10 and 11."

Jill had her eyes on her brother's hand which was very slowly stroking his cock. She had a very serious, very intense look on her face. "What were you thinking about last night, Jake?"

Jake watched his sister's fingers disappear into her thin, brown bush. "I thought of you as a girl, a woman, not as a sister. I remembered your kiss, your desire, God I sound like a Harlequin novelist. Anyway, I thought of you as someone I didn't know, someone I had never seen before, especially naked. You were beautiful, Jill," then he added, "you are beautiful."