I woke up to a slight head ache. The light streaming through the bed room window, normally muted, seemed unusually bright.
I was in my bed, but unsure about how I got here... my head felt fuzzy and a soft buzzing was in the back ground, like static or a dusty windshield, you could ignore it, but it did not go away just because you did.
The last thing I remembered was playing a pickup game of football in the park. The coach frowned on playing without pad and equipment because, God forbid, you could get injured and shit your whole future down the drain because of a stupid slip or wrong fall. (If it was up to him half the team would be put in cryogenic suspension during the summer and off season.)
School was just out so I had a couple of months with no organized practices... and I LIKE to play a fun pick up game.
While rubbing my eyes, trying to get adjusted to the bright light, in addition to the buzzing, a soft whisper began to assert itself...
{I hope he is feeling better. I can't, as much as I would like to, devote all day to waiting on him hand and foot. Groceries to buy, Jim's good suit has to go to the cleaners... and I have to stop by the pharmacy and renew his prescription for those little blue wonder pills.}
The whisper grew louder and at the same time I heard footsteps on the stairs.
{I will just peek in and see if he is still asleep.}
The door to my bedroom cracked open and my mother's red wavy locks broke the plane of wall and door, followed by her green Irish eyes and cute nose.
{Oh... he's awake}
And at the same time I heard, " Oh... you're awake"
What in the fuck was going on with my head?
{His room is always such a mess now and smells like an under arm. He used to keep it so nice and tidy... oh well, maybe I should take some time and clean it for him... }
She had moved into my room, looking around quickly... stopped, moved to the side of my bed then bent down to touch my forehead.
"How do you feel Jake?
{No fever... eyes look clear}
Mom leaned in very close. I started to pull back but was brought up short as I was already lying down.
{Eyes dilating... that's really good. Oh my poor baby, you need to be more careful}
She caressed my face, her hand moving from forehead to cheek.
"You gave us quite a scare there honey... but it looks like you're all better now."
{Football is going to be the death of him}
Two conversation were playing over themselves in my ears, I was hearing two things in her voice at the same time.
{He looks confused... }
"Do you remember hurting your head?"
Her hand got firm and grabbed my jaw, tuning my face to the side like I was three, then, gentle again she reached up to the upper right side, above and behind my ear. She probed gently but I flinched at the pain.
{Oh... damn... I did not mean to hurt him.}
You bumped your head at the park playing a game. Jackson brought you home. He was worried, said you hit the ground hard and got dazed, but everyone thought you were ok until you stated acting and talking weird
{I was so worried. Jim said no hospital even though I thought you might need a CAT scan. He can be an insensitive cheap prick sometimes.}
"I'm not sure I am alright yet mom... head feels a little weird."
"Oh you'll be up and out again in no time."
{Chasing the girls like you always have... and no wonder, you're big and strong and good looking... }
Mom's eyes darted down to my shoulders and bare chest.
{Oh Christ in a crisper! Knock it off you old fool... I need to go down stairs.}
I knew she was going to bolt, she did that often... one minute we would be talking, the next she was running to another room... she put her hand down to push off the bed but I grabbed her wrist, keeping her sitting.
{What?!!}
"Thanks mom... " I let go of her wrist and ran my hand up to her elbow.
{No!}
She scooted off the side of the mattress and away from my hand.
"... for always taking such good care of me."
As she stepped back I sat up, the sheet and covers falling off of me into my lap.
She took a deep breath and looked at the wall, exhaled and looked at me.
{Just relax Hanna... you are just going through some temporary hormone thing.... }
"It's what we moms do honey... we love you, I love you, so much... "
{Crap! I can't... }
"Mom... are YOU ok? You look kind of..."
She bolted for the door while saying, "Just rest Jake. Stay in bed for a while and I will call you down for breakfast."
And at the same time I heard her say,
{Oh shitshitshit! Don't look... please don't!}
I swung my feet off the edge of the bed and sat there as mom, I assumed, leaned against the wall next to my door. I could still hear her voice but it was not coming through the door or muffled by the wall. It sounded like she was whispering in my ear.
{I can not believe how crazy this is. Shit my nipples are so hard they hurt... you are such a bad mom Hanna Margaret! I can't do this here, I have to go to... ooo... so wet!}
