Most assume that if you have muscles, you get laid. Let me tell you something: if you have defined muscles and washboard abs, this is what you have: a strict workout schedule, an unbending diet and defined rest hours. Nowhere on that list can you see charisma. And I lack that. In cosmic proportions.
I flex my chest and girls go sparkly-eyed. I open my mouth and they turn around. I have a dark sense of humor, I'm as subtle as an anvil dropped on your crotch and I will tell you to fuck off in no uncertain terms if you say something I find offending. By the time a girl gets along with me, I'm well in the middle of the friendzone.
My answer? Hookers. I've got no stigma against that. You're horny, they charge to fuck. I'm in no relationship, nobody gets hurt.
I've been fucking Sapphire so long, I'm this close to making her my bank account's co-owner or something like that (she's not cheap, but she's worth it!)
Just a few nights prior I had given it to her so hard, she found a replacement for the next days. And she knew the day was coming near, so she had to be prepared. Why? My birthday was coming up and I wanted to celebrate on the nearest weekend to it.
On my birthday I'll cheat on my diet and do *nothing*, like I normally do on my special day. A lot of men feel lonely near Valentine's, tragically enough, I had been born in a day near to it. Girls like Sapphire sure get worked out this month.
My doorbell rang. I had taken the day off, so I had no idea of who would it be, after all, the weekend was still a few days away and I made sure I had turned my phone off to avoid those forced calls to wish me a happy birthday.
"Sapphire?"
"When you call me like that, it almost feels like my name," she giggled, "happy birthday!"
Speechless, I gave her the first chaste hug we'd ever shared. Then I saw she was wearing close to nothing and I got hard. The hug wasn't that chaste anymore, but I had to tell her, "you know? I really appreciate this because you're in no obligation to do this. And I thought you would be kinda sore, not to mention, I didn't remind you what day this was..."
"Then, be prepared to appreciate me even more," she beckoned someone I couldn't see due to the walls, and in came walking this tiny girl with a big bow tied to her neck, "my friend Robin. Or should I say, your birthday present?"
What guy gets moved to the point of almost crying because he gets a call girl as a birthday present? I do, under these circumstances.
Robin's eyes opened up when she saw my reaction, "he is sweet!"
"Wait until you get to know me," I mumbled.
"Ever had a threesome?"
My hardness responded before I could. Then, Sapphire leaned in closer, "and for you, I'm breaking my golden rule. Just tonight. If you want, that is."