A Fall in the City

Farmer Joe finds himself forced to live with his daughter and her boyfriend, Blake, for the entire Fall. The redneck hates being stuck in a small apartment in the city, but he has a secret. Joe and Blake have begun a relationship last Summer... Living once again in such close proximity, things could get steamy... and complicated.

This book is a sequel to A Summer at the Farm, told through Joe's perspective. All characters featured are above 18 years-old and this story is meant to be read by adults only.

A FALL IN THE CITY

Chapter 14: The Bartender

"I packed my things and I left the apartment. It's over.

Such a shame it all ended like this... I never wanted to hurt your daughter or to create this mess.

I don't regret any of it though."

I received this text from Blake at 5 AM the night following my confrontation with Olivia.

I was not sleeping, too nervous that something would happen during their "formal" break-up. I had not even taken my clothes off.

What was I supposed to reply to that text?

Should I have told Blake that I was not regretting any of it either? That I missed him by my side, I missed his warm body, his cheeky smile, his cock, his juicy ass...?

Should I have told him never to write me again, cut the ties once and for all?

Should I have told him that I loved him...

Wait, did I love him?!

Look at pathetic, careless Joe now.

I was supposed to stay away from any real emotions, - that was my whole identity -, not torturing my brain over handling situations like this.

God damn it, feelings were the worst!

I felt so vulnerable, I hated that.

I must have written twenty versions of a text before choosing not to send anything back.

Any kind word felt like another betrayal of Liv, - even if she had told me that I could do whatever the fuck I wanted with Blake -, and any harsh word felt like I was being unfair to Blake, and also, untrue to myself.

In the end, I wrote to Olivia instead.

It was easier since I did not have to search for the right words for too long. I knew exactly what I wanted to tell her.

"Remember, Liv. No matter what. Whether you want to talk to me or not, I'll always be there for you, any time, any place, for any reason."

That was the only thing I was sure of.

When she texted back: "I know."; I could finally fall asleep.

Sleeping in late was not really my thing but I needed the rest that morning.

When I woke up, it was past noon and Fran was already back from her trip to Las Vegas.

I went down to the kitchen in my underwear and she was eating her lunch, probably made by Alfonzo.

"Looks like someone partied hard last night." She teased me.

If only she knew.

"Nah... Just had a rough night. I usually don't sleep in like that."

"That's okay, I didn't want to be on your back. It's Sunday, you should sleep in! Any other day of the week in fact. I always think you're working too much."

"Don't worry about me."

"Everyone deserves some rest, Joe. Working all the time, that's not good for your health."

I snapped.

It was probably not the best time to get upset, but you do not really choose when you have enough, and right there, I had enough.

Fran telling me about my own health when she was hiding her own struggles had worked my last nerve.

"Fran, I cannot pretend anymore. I'm done with the lies or the concealed truths."

She was quite stunned by my tone.

"What is up with you today?"

I sighed.

"Look, I know that you're sick. Okay. Why didn't you tell me?"

This had come out so brutally and looking at her shocked face, I regretted my words immediately.

That was such a wrong way to go about that. I really was an idiot.

To be fair, aside from this whole situation with Blake and Liv, knowing that Fran was sick and that she was hiding it from me had been weighing a lot on me for the past couple of days.

I simply could not deal with the lies anymore.

"Well, good morning to you too." She replied sarcastically.

"Fuck, sorry... I didn't mean to come at you like that. I really did have a rough day yesterday and... Jesus, Fran! I thought we were close enough so you'd feel comfortable to share something like that with me. I only want to help you."

She took a bite of the grilled fish she was eating and took almost a full minute before talking again.

I wondered if she was about to kick me out of her mansion.

"Who ratted me out? The chauffeur, the cook or the gardener?"

I sat down next to her.

"Noone. I mean, Zaid sort of gave me a clue but... I caught him leaving at night. I pressed him to tell me what was going on. It wasn't his fault. I was a pain in the ass."

She looked at the ceiling.

"I can believe you were a pain in the ass."

"Don't blame Zaid, he..."

"Come on, you think I'm gonna be mad at him? Never! That boy deserves the world. He's got the purest of heart."

The purest of heart and the sweetest of ass, I thought.

But I digress.

"Listen, Fran. I know this ain't my business and I shouldn't have jumped at your throat like that. But I guess I'm just... Well, honestly, I'm just sad."

"If you're here to try to convince me to start chemotherapy or aggressive treatments, save your breath. I've made my decision a long time ago."

"I'm not trying to convincing you of anything. I understand your choice. I wouldn't want to make my body go through that myself."

"I want to go out the exact same way I've lived my life. I want to keep singing until the very end. I'm doing everything necessary to keep my body afloat and when my time will come..."

She did not finish her sentence, she had teary eyes.

I held her hand.

"All I'm saying is that I wanna be there for you." I insisted. "You've been a lifeline for me this past couple of months. I want to give back. I have to. Is there really nothing I could do to help you out?"

She smiled at me.

She really didn't look like someone who was seriously sick. She was simply an elegant older woman, with her lipstick and her black eye-liner on at all times.

"You're already helping me a lot, Joe. I want this castle to be a welcoming place to live in when I'll leave this earth. It's a beautiful present to see the bedrooms coming back to life."

"I'm doing my best with the renovation."

"And you're here... That matters and that's good enough."

"Fran, I..."

"Don't start, please. Once people know about my condition, they change. They treat me differently. Everyone is so nice with me and, in a way, scared."

"I'm not scared."

I tightened my hold of her hand.

"I have two cancers and I have to fight against kidney's failure. This is scary."

"Maybe, but you seem like the woman who can handle this."

She chuckled.

"I am..."

"Again, I'm sorry to have snapped. I don't even recognize myself, getting involved in other people's lives. I should control my emotions."

"Please, you don't have to play the big tough man's part with me. I can see through the layers of toxic masculinity."

"Masculinity is not toxic, that's some leftist's discourse crap."

"Certainly, manhood and masculinity are wonderful things, up to a certain degree. But if you think that what defines men is their inability to have feelings or emotions, first of all, you're wrong, and second of all, that is indeed toxic."

"I just think men are more wired by their cocks and their primitive instincts than by their emotions. That's all."

"Again, this is probably true but how can you take away the emotions from the primitive instincts? As painful as it is, it's just ingrained in us to care for others."

Fuck, she was good at this.

"Maybe I'm playing the tough man's part, but you're really playing up the I'm gonna die soon's card to go all wise and philosophical on me!"

She burst out laughing.

"You might have a point there. So, tell me, why did you have a rough night? What's happening to you?"

"That's a long story..."

"You're such a hypocrite, I thought you were done with the lies."

"I know, but this story is not only about me."

"It's not like I'll be able to spill the beans for long, I'm gonna die anyway. Pretty soon. Remember?"

"Again, with the death card!"

We were laughing it off, probably in an effort not to cry about it.

She was right though. I had not talked about Blake to anyone except for Liv the previous night, maybe it was time to get it off my chest.

"Would you pass me a glass of wine? I don't really have to be cautious about drinking anymore. As for your story, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to."

"I've been fucking my daughter's boyfriend."

She almost dropped the glass that I was passing her.

"Dang. That was not such a long story after all! You certainly did make it short!"

"Yeah, well, the night's been rough because I told my daughter yesterday. Turns out, she already knew."

Fran's eyes widened.

She did not seem shocked; she was like in awe of the gossip.

"Honey, this is too good, better than a telenovela! I can't believe I almost missed this story."

"My life is a pretty pathetic tv-show."

"You have to spill the tea."

I smiled.

I was happy that at the very least, my downfall was entertaining for her.

Besides, it was a good way to downplay and have perspective on the situation for my own sake. I had been way too worked up over it.

I told Fran pretty much everything except for the fact that Olivia had burnt down the farm herself.

She was not judgmental at all, only slightly surprised that I was "gay".

"I'm not sure what I am but I don't like those dumb labels." I groaned.

"You're right on that... But the boy, Blake, you like him?"

"I think that I do..."

"Well, in my views, it's more respectable then. Sometimes, there's nothing you can do to fight an attraction."

"That's nice but that's also some real bullshit. I could have put some limits. I just... I simply didn't want to."

"Clearly, Blake had things to figure out for himself and he would have been a wrong match with your daughter anyway. Looking at it this way, you may have granted Olivia a favour."

I chuckled.

"That's one way to look at it for sure... I should have told her that! She may have named me father of the year!" I said sarcastically.

"Eh! What kind of advice are you expecting of me? I'm not really mother of the year myself. None of my children had it in them just to speak to me."

"I'm sorry about that..."

I wondered what she had done exactly to get to that point, certainly nothing as bad as what I had done to Olivia.

I did not ask though.

We had shared enough personal things for one day.

"So, what do you want to do now?" She asked.

"Frankly, I have no idea. I'll just finish the renovations work here and then, I'll go back to the farm in December, as planned."

"That doesn't sound fun."

"What else am I supposed to do?"

"Enjoy the city life! You're a very attractive man in a city full of homosexuals. Maybe you should enjoy yourself before going back to your damn farm in the middle of nowhere."

She had a point.

"Trust me, I tried GrindR and cruising places, I got bored real quick."

"Of course, what's the point of meaningless encounters? Try to meet someone for real. Date someone."

"Maybe... I don't know... I've never dated much anyway."

"Well, it is about time then! How old are you? 43?"

"I've just passed 44."

"You can trust my wisdom on this one, life is way too short. You're overdue for getting on the dating market."

"I guess... I'll think about it. Maybe I'll go back on GrindR and change the settings for what I look for."

"No need to do that. I know someone who might be interested..."

I was surprised.

Was she talking about Zaid? I had not told her that I had banged her gardener. Maybe he had said something to her?

"What do you mean?"

"Sergio has a little crush on you." She winked at me playfully.

"Sergio?"

It did not ring a bell right away.

"The bartender! From the Jazz club!"

"Oh... That Sergio! Really?! The man is gay?"

She rolled her eyes.

"I thought you didn't like labels."

"I don't."

"So why do you care? I'm just telling you; he seems to be into you."

"Humf, never got that vibe from him."

"That's because he's a true professional. He asked me if you were single once, and, as a fool, I told him that I didn't think you two were playing in the same team. See, we should never have preconceived ideas or make assumptions about others."

"Definitely."

"I can give you his number?"

I felt weird about it.

Exchanging numbers, planning a date, with someone I sort of knew already, that was an odd thing to do with another man.

"I'm not sure..."

"Don't you find him attractive?"

"I've just never really thought about him that way."

"Well, first dates are always awkward. It comes with the territory. But you're not a teenager anymore and maybe you should try seeing someone your age who's not a closeted redneck or your future son-in-law."

"Okay... That's fair. Gimme his number, but I'm only doing this as a favour to you because you're sick."

I dared going in with the dark humour and I was glad that the joke landed.

Fran laughed and she gave me Sergio's number.

"Besides, you're not taking any chance with him. We already know he's into you. And a little bird told me he was a bottom..."

It was my turn to roll my eyes.

"Don't get your hopes up, I'm not a romantic."

I kept the number but I did not write to Sergio right away.

First thing first, I needed to do what I did best to clear my mind, which was working with my bare hands.

I truly believe that one of the things which is the most detrimental to our modern societies is the fact that people have stopped building things by themselves.

You need to feel the dirt, the materials, the concrete against your hands.

Watching everything through a screen, that is just not good for your mental health and for forming a cohesive society.

I let a few days passed, focusing on the renovation works, and already, I was feeling better.

Liv and I had talked once over the phone and she seemed okay.

Blake had not reached to me again and I had not replied to his text. I still did not know what to say.

The next Thursday, I thought it was time to get some action going and instead of messaging Sergio, I decided that it was better to directly go to the jazz club.

Let's hit him up face to face. That was more my style.

We rid there with Fran and she could not stop smirking in the car.

"Shut up, maybe nothing's gonna happen!"

"I didn't say anything..."

I ignored her and sat at my usual spot at the bar.

Sergio was there, dressed nicely, his beard perfectly trimmed, as usual.

I had not made much of an effort myself.

I could not shake the redneck out of me too much. Besides, from my previous encounters in the city, I knew gay men loved my raunchiness more than anything else.

I ordered my usual scotch, although I didn't have to say it, the drink was ready as soon as I sat down.

Sergio was an experienced bartender. He knew his clientele.

He acted exactly the same as before. Sergio was rather detached, not bothering me, which indicated that Fran had not said anything to him.

Good.

I was looking at him differently though, noticing how his fat ass was nicely enhanced in his (too) tight pants. A yummy peach to take a large bite of!

Lova Lova sang her tunes, I noticed she seemed a little off but maybe it was just an idea in my head because I knew about her disease now.

I tried to catch if Sergio was glancing at me but he was not giving me anything.

Fucking hell, I was not a teenage girl, I went for it anyway.

"Yo, Sergio. Come here."

I called him.

"How can I treat you tonight, Joe?"

I loved this phrasing even if he was just talking about the drinks.

I was a bit tired with all the beat around the bush lately so I decided to be my usual-self, meaning straight forward and rather blunt.

"Been comin' at this bar for a while now, and only noticing this nice bubble butt of yours!"

He gasped in surprise.

"Wow. Where is this coming from?" He chuckled nervously.

"What can I say? I'm not made of wood, there are some things I see which catch my interest."

"You're sure you're not drunk?"

"With two whiskeys, please, I thought my bartender knew me better than this."

"I suppose... You generally handle your drinks pretty well. So, what is it, you're hitting on me now?"

"Don't act like I'm the first client coming at you, you must get this all the time."

"That's not wrong but I rarely reciprocate."

"Oh. I see."

"I might reciprocate with hot farmers from Utah though." He winked at me and poured me another whiskey. "This one is on the house."

Maybe I was a teenage girl after all, I was all flustered by this.

Fran had been right, this interaction was much more fun than GrindR encounters.

"Thanks. I should praise your ass more often for some free drinks."

"Imagine what would you get if you were doing more to my butt than praising him?"

Damn, the bartender could get feisty!

I did not have time to reply that he was called at the other end of the bar.

It just gave me another opportunity to stare at his ass.

It really was big, a perfect Latino bum. It reminded me somewhat of a dude I used to fuck at the glory-hole.

In any case, my dick was already stirring up in my pants.

Sergio came back to me a few minutes later, Lova Lova was finishing her set. The audience was once again captured by her performance.

"Should I stay here to help you close the bar?" I suggested.

"I don't need help to close the bar, but yes, stay put. We could have a drink... Just the two of us, once everyone is gone?"

I liked the sound of that.

"Deal."

It took another forty minutes before the jazz club was empty.

Fran left with the biggest grin on her face, calling her chauffeur since I would not be able to drive her back home.

I waited for Sergio to be ready, getting increasingly hornier in anticipation.

In the days following my talk with Olivia, my sex drive had been at its lowest point in a while, probably since Debbie's death.

Normally, even when something was wrong, raw sex was the go-to answer for me.

But finally, my libido was back!

I was lost in my thoughts when I heard the guitar playing.

I turned around, Sergio was playing the classic "Wonderwall", usually the first tune you are taught when you learn to play guitar.

He was not too bad at it, not really talented either if I am being honest.

I found myself mumbling the lyrics.

"Today's gonna be the day..."

"Right now, I should have realized..."

"I don't believe that anybody feels the way I do... About you now..."

It made me sad.

I thought about Blake again, almost got teary eyes.

Shit, these emotions were really getting out of control!

I clapped when Sergio was done.

"Don't judge me, man. This was really me trying my best."

"You were pretty good." I lied.

He did not believe me but that was okay.

"So, what's your deal?" He asked, sitting on the stool next to me.

It was odd seeing him on the other side of the bar, with me.

"My deal? I'm just a normal guy, spending a little time in the city. What's yours?"

"So am I, a normal guy, living in the city. When are you going back to Utah?"

"If everything goes right in a little more than a month, but before the end of the year in any case."

"I guess you're not looking for anything serious then?"

Those were legitimate date questions.

"I'm not looking for anything... I mean, I'm just... I'm trying new things."

"You've never dated men before?"

I laughed out loud.

"Don't worry, I'm no virgin!"

"That was not the question."

"Let's say that I'm more the hard-fucking type rather than the boyfriend type."