It all started with a break-up, a big blue dildo, and a prank.
The break-up was with a girl I had been seeing for the past couple months, Rosie. I had tried to communicate with her that I did not want a serious girlfriend from the start, but as time went on she fell for me; the feelings unrequited. Of course I felt guilty, but it seemed no matter how many times I attempted open and honest communication, someone's heart almost always got broken. And it usually wasn't mine.
The big blue dildo came a couple weeks before we split. Rosie took me to a sex store, wanting to try and spice things up. A last ditch effort to try and salvage whatever our relationship was. It was about 8 inches, girthy and veiny, with silicon balls and a suction cup at the base. We had meant to use it that night, but some argument side-tracked us and instead it got thrown in a box under the bed. When she left I asked if she wanted to keep it.
"Shove it up your own ass, Ben" she had said.
Maybe I will
, I thought. I had recently been experimenting with fingers during masturbation, but the angle tired my wrist and often left me wanting something easier to use. Still, the jump from a finger to that girthy blue boy seemed like a lot at once. So it sat, under my bed, waiting.
A few weeks later I was wandering the aisles at CVS, thinking about nothing in particular when a box caught my eye. ENEMA, it said in large letters. Easy to Use, Fast Acting! My birthday was the next day, and my two best friends, Matt and Alex, had both declined on any party at my place. We had plans to get a drink at our local watering hole, but they were swamped with work. Strictly one and done. The dildo popped into my head, and in an instant I knew how I wanted to spend my birthday night. Without a second thought I grabbed the enema off the shelf, and headed to checkout.
The next day I met up with Matt and Alex, the enema safely under my bed next to the dildo. Walking into the bar, I saw the two of them sitting in a corner table. Matt, a bodybuilder and constantly worried about calories, had ordered tequila shots for the table. They waved me over. I sat down next to Alex, who was a swimmer and had the figure to show for it.
"Wow guys, tequila to start? Are you sure you'll be able to get back to work?" I joked.
"Oh, don't worry about us Benny boy, tonight is supposed to be your night. That's why I got you two." Matt said, pushing two shots towards me. I shrugged internally, thinking that extra alcohol could only help me to get in the mood later on. The thought of what was waiting for me gnawed excitedly at the back of my mind. We cheers'd, and I tossed back both shots immediately, grimacing. Out of the corner of my eye Matt and Alex looked at each other, eyebrows raised.
"What, just cause you two assholes have to get back to work doesn't mean I have to. I'm planning on getting drunk all on my own lonesome if I have to." I said mournfully. "Anyone want a beer?" I started to stand up, but Alex pushed me back down.
"Oh no you don't, I got this," He said, and moved towards the bar. "You'll want a dark lager, right?" I grinned. Even if they had to work, it was nice to have friends that knew me. As he left, Matt turned his attention towards me
"Alright man, I have officially got the shrooms for the festival." he said in a low voice, "And maybe something else too, but you'll find out about that later." He gave a little half smile, as if laughing at an inside joke.
"Perfect, it's been a while since I tripped, and you've never led me astray before." Matt loved recreational drugs, although he always tested them and never overdid it. Whenever I had the chance I joined him, and each time was more fun than the last.
"Okay, one dark lager for the birthday boy, one IPA for me, and a vodka soda for the princess" Alex said, returning from the bar. Matt huffed, and started in on his usual rant about diet. But the long tall glass the vodka soda came in reminded me of what I had in store, and I found myself distracted again, watching a droplet of condensation drip slowly down the side.
Forty minutes later, both Matt and Alex begged off, apologizing profusely about having to work. I left them smiling and began to walk home, feeling a strong buzz from the alcohol. There was another buzz too, an awareness that lay just below the surface. My skin felt fiery, my mind awake. I entered my small studio and immediately pulled the box from under my bed. I was hyper aware of the cotton shirt and jeans on my hot skin, and shed them quickly. Tossing the dildo on my covers, I picked up the enema and turned the box over to read the instructions. Kneel over, insert tip, squeeze contents into rectum, wait five minutes or until urge to relieve yourself occurs. Seemed simple enough. I went into the bathroom to start the process. It was slightly uncomfortable, kneeling on the tile floor, but went quickly. Afterwords, I decided to hop in the shower and really scrub myself out, playing with myself a little in the process. More and more my excitement was building, my heart thundering in my chest. Stepping out of the shower, I dried myself off quickly before wrapping the towel around my waist. Leaving the bathroom, I managed one step towards my bed.
"SURPRISE!"
I nearly jumped out of my towel at the sound. Both Matt and Alex were grinning at me, standing up from their hiding place behind my couch.
"Wha-"
"Got you good, didn't we." Matt said.
"How could you think we'd let you be alone on your birthday?" Alex said, moving towards me. They both were smiling like idiots, grins spreading from ear to ear.
I grabbed my boxers from the bed and slid them on, then quickly tossed my towel over the dildo.
