Avery's Desire

"This is fucking bullshit!" Mikey wadded up the newspaper and threw it across the room. "They shouldn't even have been allowed to enter. Having Cole Rhoads as part of the band is a fucking joke. This is supposed to be for amateur bands, not seasoned musicians."

"Dude, take a chill pill." Kassidy Lane, the pirate from the Halloween party, was stretched out across the old pull out couch in Mikey's basement, flipping through a video game magazine.

"Chill? Did you honestly just tell me to chill?" Mikey kicked an empty soda carton out of his way as he paced angrily back and forth across the room. "This is a fucking disaster, Kass! I really need to teach that little fucker a lesson. If he thinks he can take this away from me too, he's got another thing coming."

"I don't think he's trying to take anything away from you Mikey. Honestly bro, he's just trying to win the prize, like every other band that's applied. It's not a personal insult to you."

Mikey glared at Kass. "Of course it's an insult to me. It's a fucking slap in the face! Avery dumped me; he threw me out his life, and betrayed my love! He took my friends away from me; they practically kicked me out of the band that I started! How is that not a personal insult to me?"

"Dude, I think you're blowing this whole thing out of proportion. I get it that he hurt you. What he did was low man, dumping you just so he could go off and fuck some rock star like a common groupie, but it's time to let it go. He ain't worth it. Right now you just gotta focus on the music man, that and nothing more."

"I can't just let it go." Mikey fumed. "The worst thing I ever did was take pity on that little bitch. He was nobody when I found him. Just some scared little kid that ran away from home. He didn't have any friends, no job, not even a place to stay. Hell, when I first met the kid he was staying at the Y! I took him in, introduced him to the others, begged them to let him in the band, and this is how he repays me? There is no way in hell that I will just let it go! I'm going to make the fucker pay for what he did to me."

"Good..." Kassidy sat the magazine aside and stood up. He walked to Mikey and put a hand on his shoulder, but Mikey shrugged it off. "The best way to get back at him is by beating his ass on stage. Focus on the music bro, we can beat them. Those guys can't hold a candle to us. So what if they have Cole Rhoads, he's old and rusty. We're young, fresh, and our music rocks. If you want to make that little shit pay for what he did to you, then humiliate him on stage. Make them regret that they ever kicked you out."

"Man, are you fucking dense or what? Signing Cole up was a shit move on their part, but it was a smart one. He may be old but he ain't rusty. You heard him play that night; he was tearing that shit up. Not to mention all the fans that he's already got in his pocket."

Mikey picked up a handful of darts and started flinging them at the dart board across from him. As each one hit the board he imagined that it was Avery's face he was flinging darts at. "It would have been hard to beat them with just Avery in the band, but now having to play against Cole too, we don't stand a snow ball's chance in hell."

Kassidy frowned. "Dude, how can you say that? We're better than them. No one can beat Screaming Metal, with you on lead guitar and vocals we definitely won't lose."

"Oh grow up." Mikey growled. "A singer is only as good as his band and I've heard toddlers that play better than you assholes. Rick is a classical pianist; Trash practically sleeps with his drums; that new chick is pretty fierce on the guitar, and we already know how good Cole is. Avery sings like an angel, which is why I recruited him in the first place.

What do we got? Sean's drumming is mediocre at best, and Zach's keyboarding sucks. He can't keep up with the rest of us and he keeps losing the beat. You're bass is okay, but you're no Cole Rhoads. Frankly, I'm sick of carrying the rest of you. My talent will only get us so far. If I didn't need the rest of you idiots to qualify for a spot in this contest I'd go solo."

Kassidy narrowed his eyes. He was pissed. "You know what man; don't do us any favors alright. We let you join the band, yeah that's right; we LET you join, because we needed a good guitarist. You came to us, begging for a gig so we took you in. You play a mean guitar but you got a piss poor attitude. You wanna go solo, that's fine by me."

Kassidy walked passed Mikey and headed for the stairs. He stopped and turned back to look at him, his eyes glowing with rage. "I can see why they kicked you out of the band, no one in their right minds would want you around. You're an ungrateful piece of shit. Consider yourself on notice, after the concert you're out; good luck on your solo career, jack-ass!"

Kassidy took the stairs two at a time as he stormed out of the basement, slamming the door hard behind him.

Mikey kicked a folding chair across the room, crashing it into an end table. "Yeah fuck you too asshole!" He screamed at the empty steps. "You won't survive without me; I'm the only talent this fucking piece of shit band has!"

Mikey walked across the room, kicking broken glass and debris out of his way. He picked up an empty beer bottle and threw it at the wall. It crashed against the plaster and dry wall with a loud clunk, spraying remnants of green glass and beer everywhere, denting the wall.

"Mother fuckers!" He sneered, "They can't win this thing without me, and I'll prove it. I'm the only one that has the balls to do anything about it."

He picked up his cell phone and scanned through his contacts till he found the name he was looking for. He hit the call button then waited for someone to pick up.

"Hey Frankie," Mikey grinned when he heard the voice on the other end of the line. "Hey, I'm glad I caught you. Hey is Don still in town? He is? Great, I got something for ya, a job. You interested? Awesome, meet me at Fulks Road in an hour. Oh yeah, this is right up your alley. You're going to love this shit."

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Avery was lying on the bed with the pillow over his face, refusing to look at Rick.

"Come on baby," Rick pleaded with him. "Don't be that way. You know I have to go. I don't want to but I don't have much of a choice."

"Yes you do," Avery whined, his voice muffled by the pillow. "You can choose to stay. Stay, and make love to me all day."

Rick grinned some and rolled his eyes. "Do you want me to lose my job?"

"Yes!" Avery said sharply, pouting.

Rick crossed his arms and shook his head. "And what do you suggest that I do for money then?"

Avery pulled the pillow away from his face and smiled mischievously. "You don't need to worry about money. My parents give me enough to support us both. I can be your sugar daddy."

Rick bellowed a hearty laugh at that. "Yeah," He smirked. "That's never going to happen. Besides, I'm older than you; I should be YOUR sugar daddy, not the other way around."

Avery rolled his eyes, "Details, details..."

"Anyway..." Rick picked up one his shirts from the chair and sniffed it. "Is this clean?" he asked.

Avery raised an eye brow. "No, you've worn that for like three days in a row."

"I have?"

"Uh...yeah."

Rick looked around the room. An expression of confusion settled over his face. Finally he turned back to Avery. "Where are my clean shirts? He asked him.

Avery smirked. "Depends on which kind you want. Your dress shirts are hanging in the closet. T-shirts are in the second drawer, undershirts are in the top next to your socks. That God awful flannel thing you wear with the holes in it and the stain on the arm, I have no idea; it disappeared suddenly." He chuckled softly when he saw the look on Rick's face. "Sorry, it was here one minute then gone the next, like magic."

"Oh I'm sure it was magic." Rick rolled his eyes. "What about my work shirts, haven't seen them around have you."

"Yeah, I ironed them and hung them in the closet."

Rick's eyes widened. "You iron?"

Avery nodded slowly. "I use fabric softener too, something I suspect that you know nothing about."

"That's a real thing?" Rick snickered. He walked to the closet and pulled out one of his work shirts and sniffed it. "Holy shit!" He laughed, "My clothes haven't smelled this clean since before my mother passed."

"That's a scary thought." Avery grumbled.

"You still pissed at me?" Rick sat down on the bed next to Avery.

"I'm not pissed." Avery told him. "I just don't want you to go. I sit here alone all night and miss you when you're at work."

"It can't be helped. I'm not going to just mooch off you, we're a team. Besides, I like having my own money. That way I can surprise you with things." Rick leaned over and kissed Avery.

Avery slipped his arms around Rick's neck and kissed him back. He loved Rick more than anything, just being in his arms made Avery feel like there was nothing in the world that he couldn't achieve. Rick was his strength, and his passion. He didn't want to let him go, even if it was only for eight hours. When they weren't together, Avery no longer felt whole. Rick was a part of him now; he was part of his soul, and part of his heart. Without him, nothing felt real. Avery hated that feeling.

"You really need to find a job you can do from home." Avery winked at him.

"Umm..." Rick kissed him again, "There are a few things I could do from home, but unfortunately I wouldn't get paid for them."

"I'd make it worth your while." Avery teased.

Rick laughed. "Oh, I'm sure you would, but, that will have to wait till I get home. I really have to go or I'll be late."

Rick stood up, pulling away from Avery who was desperately trying to hold onto him. Avery rolled onto his side and propped his head up on his elbow, pouting.

"I'll count the minutes until you return." He whimpered.

"Don't be a drama Queen." Rick looked at Avery and chuckled. "Stick in a horror movie or read a book. Didn't you rent that one movie the other night, children of the lima bean field, or something?"

"Gee, you're hilarious." Avery giggled.

"I always figured if I didn't make it as a famous pianist I'd be a stand-up comic." Rick kissed Avery on the forehead.

"At least you have a backup plan." Avery laughed.

"Yeah, thank God for that." Rick smiled. He glanced around to make sure he had everything then he sighed and looked at Avery. "Okay babe, I have to go."

"I'll miss you." Avery sulked.

"I'll miss you to baby boy." Rick gave him one last kiss good-bye before heading out.

"Have a good night." Avery called after him.

"I'll try..." Rick called back.

Avery lay back against the mattress and groaned. The apartment was way too quiet without Rick. In the few short weeks since Rick had moved in, Avery had gotten used to having someone around all the time. He liked knowing that he wasn't alone anymore, and he certainly didn't miss the solitude. But when Rick went to work, Avery was more aware than ever of how lonesome it was and how alone he'd felt before. That was a feeling he hoped he would never have to feel again.

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Avery stepped outside and sat on the steps at the top of the second floor landing. It was cool outside, but not too cold yet. The crisp November air felt good on his face and he liked the way the cool breeze lifted his long hair off his neck and swirled it around him.

He was dressed in just a pair of black jeans, nothing too fancy. They were tight around the waist and hips, but hung loosely down his legs. They were a little long on him, the cuffs dragged the ground behind him as he walked, which caused them to be slightly frayed.

A pair of black and red tennis shows adorned his feet. His shirt was a simple band T-shirt that was covered by a black hoody which he'd zipped up most of the way in order to block out the cold. His hair was gathered into a long pony tail, the way he normally wore it when not on stage.

Contrary to popular belief, Avery did actually own clothing that wasn't all black; he just didn't often wear anything but black. It wasn't part of his persona, or even a fashion statement. It wasn't something he did to rebel or to make himself stand out from others. In fact, it was quite the opposite.

He wore black so that he would disappear, become invisible, and fade into the shadows that he tried so desperately to conceal himself in.

For most of his life, Avery had tried his best not to stand out. It wasn't until that first time that he'd taken to the stage; the microphone held firmly in his hand, the spot light illuminating his face as dozens of eyes watched on, that he realized he no longer cared if he stood out. He wasn't nervous when he noticed that everyone was looking at him, he wasn't scared to be the center of attention.

He was a different person on stage, and the shy, frightened, little Avery who had always been scared of his own shadow was suddenly gone; in his place stood a man that was confident, proud, and self-assured. When he opened his mouth to sing, his voice was huge, commanding, and assertive. He demanded the audience's attention and they freely gave it to him.

This was the type of man that Avery wanted to be in every aspect of his life, not just on stage. But past experience had taught him to be cautious and a bit closed off. Meeting Rick and Trash for the first time was a real eye opener for him. Until then, he'd always thought of straight men and women as the enemy.

He felt as though they were a different species than him, creatures that would never understand him or accept him.

When Trash and Rick accepted him for who he was, Avery finally felt like he belonged somewhere. He wasn't just an outsider, or a freak. He'd really grown as a person since then. He was still a little reluctant to let his guard down in public, but he wasn't as frightened or stand-offish as he once was.

He realized now that being different wasn't necessarily a bad thing. There were people who loved him. He had a family. They weren't blood, but that didn't matter. They loved him and he loved them. That was all he ever really wanted, just to be loved. He had that now with boomer, and the band, and with Rick. Rick was brave; Avery wanted to be like that. He wanted to make Rick proud.

He wanted to hold his head up high, walk down the street with Rick, hand in hand, and not worry about what people thought of them.

Avery no longer cared what his family thought of him either. He was happy now. He never thought he would be happy but he was.

He'd left home a scared and timid little child and had grown into a confident young man with his entire life ahead of him. So many wonderful things were happening to him now. Maybe it was time for the old him, the kid dressed in black with the sullen eyes, and slouching shoulders to come out of the shadows and greet the sun.

Avery lit a cigarette. He took a long, thoughtful drag, exhaled the smoke, and smiled to himself. His life wasn't perfect, but was anyone's really? Life is what you make of it. You can either crawl into a hole and hide away from everyone and everything or you can stand up tall and take what you want.

That's what Avery was going to do now. He was going to grab hold of what he wanted with both hands and not let go; whether it was love, fame, acceptance, or just plain happiness. He wasn't about to let anything stand in the way of his happiness. He was a new man, with new found strength. He owed that in part to Rick. Rick was his inspiration, his muse.

Avery flicked his ash over the side of the steps and grinned, a huge, bright grin. He knew how they would win the battle of the bands. Love was his inspiration, and for the first time in his life, he wasn't afraid to show that love to the rest of the world.

Rick would be gone for another five hours, so that gave Avery plenty of free time to work. He tossed his cigarette then stood up and went back inside. The notebook he'd gotten from Cole for his birthday was sitting on the desk in his room. He hadn't written anything in it yet but he had an idea for a song. It was time to put his gift, and his talents, to good use, and write the song that was going to win them the competition.

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Avery was lying on his side, fast asleep, when Rick got home that night. After the night he'd had the only thing he wanted was sleep, but looking at Avery lying there, Rick couldn't help but fall in love with him all over again.

He was so beautiful, like a sleeping angel. His long dark hair was fanned out over the pillow with unruly strands spilling off onto the mattress. He'd discarded his clothes in favor of a white cotton undershirt and a pair of dark blue, low rise shorts.

Rick loved the way Avery's ass looked in those tight shorts. They showed off his firm, round, little ass just perfectly. He had to push back the urge to trace his finger along the waist band and over the line of Avery's hip. Doing so would probably wake him up and Rick didn't want that, he was enjoying watching him sleep too much.

After several minutes had passed, Rick yawned and then undressed. He crawled into the bed next to Avery and gently kissed the side of his face before switching off the light. Avery stirred, but he didn't wake. Rick drew closer to him, wrapping his arms around the boy, and fell asleep beside him.

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Over the course of the next week, Avery and the others spent as much time in rehearsals as possible. They were allowed twenty minutes, and only two songs. The first song they'd decided on was a popular one that Trash had written. It was fast paced, and a little harder than most of their songs, but it was a crowd pleaser. The second song would be the debut of Avery's original piece.

He was reluctant at first to show the others, that old fear inside creeping up on him again, but in the end he knew that it was good and he knew the others would love it. They were all a bit shocked though, especially Rick and Trash who rarely had the privilege of hearing any of Avery's originals. The thing that surprised them the most though was the fact that what he'd written was a love balled; it was nothing like the dark, somber, and depressing songs that he normally sang.

Rick had gotten a quick peek at some of what Avery had been working on earlier, and even those songs had a more light hearted and uplifting feel to them, though none of them had been complete. Still, Rick could feel the powerful love and emotions that were conveyed in the words as he read them. Avery had truly found another side of himself, or just awakened a side that had long been dormant.

Rick liked to think that he had something to do with the emergence of this new attitude. If the power of his love for Avery could pull him out the darkness that had sheltered him for so long, then Rick knew that their love could concur anything.

Things began to fall into a regular pattern. The rehearsal schedule was worked around Cole, Trash, and Rick's work schedules. Cole and Trash worked days, while Rick did some early evenings and overnights. Since the supply truck only came on Monday's and Thursday's, Rick had every weekend off, which worked out pretty well, but Avery could tell that the busy schedule was taking its toll.

Again he tried to convince Rick to quit the stock crew, but Rick refused. He wasn't going to allow Avery to support him, and he stood firm on that. As much as loved spending time with Avery, Rick wanted to pull his own weight; it was important to him. Eventually Avery just gave up, realizing that Rick was not going to be swayed.

Avery admired Rick's resolve as well as his work ethic, but he still worried that Rick was taking on too much. Moving in together was supposed to help Rick offset some of his living expenses so he wouldn't have to work so many long and strenuous hours, and Avery had no problem taking on most of the financial burden if it would help Rick, but Rick assured Avery that he wasn't along for a free ride and he intended to contribute as much to their relationship as he could.