Ben's ass was a little sore, but it had been worth it. He lay in Dean's bed long after his shower, really not feeling like doing anything but existing in the near vicinity of Dean. He buried his face in Dean's pillow and breathed in, then rolled over so he could watch his boyfriend.
Dean played some game on his computer, he'd been considerate enough to put headphones so Ben could rest. Watching Dean play felt slightly voyeuristic, seeing this part of his boyfriend had him feeling good, or at least fought off the feelings that he knew he was going to have to confront eventually.
He was dozing when he heard Dean's phone ring. Dean didn't notice it with his headphones on, so Ben kicked at his chair, sending Dean spinning. Dean looked at him with an annoyed scowl then laughed and turned to go back to his game.
"Your phone!" he barked, holding his hand up to his ear.
Dean nodded. "Sorry," he apologized, taking his headphones off. He looked at his phone's display then his eyes bunched up and he looked at Ben quizzically before he slid his finger across the screen. "Um, hello?"
Ben could tell the caller was female, but he couldn't hear anything she said. "Ah, yes?" Dean answered her first question. "Yes. Wait, who is this?" Dean listened to the answer and then looked up at him sharply.
"Who is it?" he whispered.
Dean put his hand over the phone. "Your sister Molly," he hissed, then returned to the phone. "He's here."
His stomach turned to lead. How did she have Dean's number? Was she calling to disown him, too? He couldn't handle another of his loved ones rejecting him right now. "Hang up," Ben whispered. "I can't, Dean. I just can't right now."
"No," Dean said, but not to him. "He's not in a good way right now." He could hear his sister talking, but still not what she was saying, and that was killing him a little, too. "No, he's with me. No, at my house." He paused. "If you already knew he wasn't home then why did you ask if I-" His sister said something and Dean sighed. "You're definitely siblings," Dean told his sister.
He heard her laugh, and if she was laughing it couldn't be, she probably didn't hate him like his mom... His throat grew tight again. "Hang up," he said, still uncertain enough that he didn't want to risk it.
Dean waved him away, shaking his head no. "No, you can't come here. He's not..." Dean listened again. "Yeah, that might work. I need you to, no, listen, seriously, woman, I'm-"
Ben exhaled slowly, then chuckled, Molly was still Molly. "It's okay, Dean. Let me talk to her."
Dean looked up at him sharply. "He'll call you back," he barked, then stabbed the red circle on his phone harder than it deserved. "No."
"Okay."
Dean opened his mouth, then closed it again, only to purse his lips before opening it again. "You don't even know what I was saying 'no' to," Dean complained.
"Does it matter?" Ben asked. "You said no, and I trust you."
Dean sighed again. "You're killing me, DeLuca." Still, he put his phone on his computer desk and got up, then sat down next to Ben's knees. "Sit up, yea?"
Ben did, then leaned against Dean. Dean relaxed into him, which made him happier than it should. It had taken him so long to get Dean to open up to him, to be comfortable like this that he wasn't gonna take it for granted. "Thanks," Ben whispered, trying to memorize this moment in time before he had to go back to everything else.
"Thanks for what?" Dean asked, sounding sad.
Ben slid down his side and curled into a ball, his head falling to Dean's thigh. Dean's fingers sank into his hair and he was sure Dean didn't realize he was petting him. It made him feel special. "For all of this, for last night, and all of today. For being here for me, loving me even though it's not easy."
Dean snorted a laugh. "Loving you is too easy, Ben. That's part of the problem."
He rolled his eyes. Dean was Dean, and he loved this part of him, too. He just loved Dean, all the parts, every one of the parts. "I know, I'm just too loveable. But for now, I'd just like to be loveable for you. I'm just gonna live in your bed forever, is that okay?"
Dean's fingers flexed in his hair. "You can't live in my bed forever."
Ben looked up and saw those rosy cheeks he loved so much and smiled, then raised his finger up and touched Dean's nose. "Boop!"
Dean caught his finger and bit it, then sobered again in the next breath. "Your sister's at your house."
"How'd she have your number?" he asked. "Wait, what? She's at my house, why's she at my house? Do you somehow know my sister?"
Dean rolled his eyes. "I don't know your sister. She called from your phone. She wants to talk to you." As if to prove his point, Dean's phone buzzed on his computer desk. "That's probably her."
"Yeah, she doesn't like being hung up on," Ben agreed.
"She reminds me of someone else I know," Dean noted.
Ben snorted. "I have no idea of whom you speak."
Dean scratched his head playfully, then pushed him off his lap and stood up. "She wants to talk to you. Are you..."
"Not really," he admitted, fighting off the depression that circled around him like hungry hyenas. "But, she's not gonna let up, especially if she already drove up here from mom's house. I mean, Tampa is already like a two hour flight, and then on top of that with three kids... it probably feels more like a ten hour flight, especially since Dwayne isn't here..."
"Dwayne?"
"My brother-in-law. Deployed in Afghanistan right now, eighteen month deployment, so she's doing the single mom thing currently. I told her not to marry a career soldier."
"Oh," Dean said. His phone stopped ringing and he handed it to Ben. "You should decide. I don't have the right to tell you what to do, not, ah, well, yea."
He pushed Dean's phone away. "I'm not ready," he admitted, swallowing down the bile that was climbing his throat.
Dean nodded. The phone rang again. Dean swallowed hard, then answered it. "Put my stupid brother on the phone, Dean," he heard his sister snap. "It's cold as balls out here. Either that, or tell me where you live so I can come there. Did I mention that it's cold as balls here, Dean? I moved away from this hellhole for a reason, and fucking cold as balls here is one of them!"
Ben blinked a few times, then snorted out a laugh before Dean could think up a good response. He took the phone from his stunned boyfriend's fingers before Dean could stop him. "Hey Molly," he said, trying to sound less afraid that he actually was. He hit the speaker button, too afraid to do this alone.
"Ben! Holy fuck balls, Ben, what the fuck?"
He swallowed hard, his stomach churning. "So, ma told you?"
"She's lucky I needed a break from my kids or I probably would've been a lot meaner than I was. What the everloving hell is wrong with her! I can't believe it, I can't believe she kicked you out. Your poor cat is crying non-stop, and Jamie won't stop asking about Mr. Rice Uncle, so thanks a lot for teaching him that on our last Zoom call, by the way."
"I, what now?" he said, trying to process everything all at once and failing. "I mean, Mr. Rice Uncle is pretty funny." Dean looked at him, worried, but also confused. "Jamie's three, and I'm Uncle Ben."
