My name is Bernard Brown and I am a big and tall black guy. A lot of people think that if you are a big guy, then your life is miserable and lonely and you don't get any fun. That's so lame, seriously! When you describe a miserable person with self-esteem issues who hates themselves and doesn't want to enjoy life, you're not talking about a big man or a big woman. You're talking about a loser. Losers come in both sexes and all sizes. Big men and big women are not more likely than skinny folks to have self-esteem issues. It's all about how you look at life. Deal with it!
I originally came from a small town called Hicks, Ohio. It's one of those very small towns where everybody knew everybody. I hated it. I was always a good student and when high school ended, I won myself an academic scholarship to New York University. It's the big city, very different from a small town and I must say that I love it. I moved into the dorms. My roommate is James O'Shea, a tall, lean Irishman who got nicknamed Red James because he's got red hair. He's pretty cool. So far, I like campus and I like my classes.
I'm studying Criminal Justice because I want to become a police officer. My father is a cop in our hometown, and my mother was a cop, then she turned to teaching. Oh, well. Campus life is fun. I've made many friends. The good thing about this campus is that there is a fair number of black people. Growing up in Ohio, I didn't see a lot of black people. I was one of forty black students in a high school with a student population of three hundred. See what I mean?
I sometimes hang out with James, and his best friend Theodore Norris. Theodore is a slim and muscular, brown-skinned young man from Chicago. He's a really shy guy, and he's also gay, though he keeps it to himself. I think he's got a crush on James but he hasn't told him. Indeed, Theodore looks every bit like the smart nerd he is supposed to be. He's an engineering major. I don't know why he hangs out with James. They're so different. Anyway, there is a reason why I brought up James.
Theo played an important part in my sexual development. You see, I left Ohio as a virgin. I wanted badly to experiment in the city. I've already tried smoking pot and drinking. I've also watched porn after buying large quantities of it. Yet I've never had sex. Still, everyone has a sexual identity and I would rate myself as ninety nine percent straight. I did have a brief experience with another young man back home but it wasn't satisfactory. I've also kissed women, made out with them and gotten as far as heavy petting but I have yet to go all the way with anyone. I checked out women more often than I checked out men, though I found both attractive at times. See? I was a frustrated young man. Theo helped me out.
