I want to start by giving a special shout out to those who have waited so long for the continuing of this story. And for those who continued to help and push me. From the bottom of my heart, Thank You.
*****
Four days had passed since the incident in Zander's office. While things mostly seemed as normal as they could be, Rei was still unsettled. That day, he had fled from the scrutiny of Glenn. He wasn't sure why the man didn't like him. He could only guess it was because Glenn felt as though Rei was taking advantage of Zander's kindness.
What made matters worse was the fact that, at times, Rei felt the same way. Zander had spent so much on him already and still continued to. At first, Rei had tried to refuse the gifts given to him by Zander, yet seeing the hurt multicolored eyes always had Rei stumbling and taking back his words.
The party was scheduled for that evening and Rei could feel the excited energy burning throughout the house. The cook, Layla, had become a quick friend. When Zander had introduced them that night, Rei had felt at ease right away. At first, he found it odd. Given the way things were with his mother, Rei found himself being more withdrawn from women, choosing only to be polite when spoken to but never actively seeking out their company.
Layla was in her 50's but didn't give the air of an old woman. She stood at Rei's height and had a head full of grey curls. Her soft and round face was like a beacon of light. She was animated, talking loudly, her hands on a constant move, adding life to every word she spoke. Rei had never witnessed Layla losing her temper, even when one of the other workers bumped into her, knocking the fresh batch of Christmas cookies she had spent hours decorating for the party from the silver platter in her hands to the floor. She had simply smiled and patted the frazzled young man before sending him off with a treat. Rei found himself spending more time than not in the kitchen, watching as Layla worked, bringing out masterpiece after masterpiece.
He had also found out that Layla was married to Zander's driver and bodyguard, Martin. They had been together for years, both having met Zander when Martin's boss had assigned him to watch over a teenage Zander. The years together had formed a bond between the three, the couple acting as a surrogate family for Zander. When Martin had been in danger of losing his position, Zander had offered them a place at his home, allowing them to continue working for him.
Rei loved hearing stories about Zander as a teenager. He had been wild. Layla told him of the four different schools he had been expelled from for fighting. It was apparent that at some point Zander had had a bit of a temper. For the most part, Rei believed that Zander had gained control of that temper. But all he had to do was remember how cold and detached Zander had been while dealing with his mother. Those eyes had spoken more than any of his actions had done. As far as Rei knew, his mother hadn't tried to get back in contact with him which he was more than grateful for.
The only thing that seemed different, was Zander himself. For awhile, Rei was certain he had fallen back into his habit of over thinking. Whenever Zander entered a room, their eyes seemed to draw into each other. His multicolored eyes held a desire that even someone as inexperienced as Rei could easily pick up on. Yet, as if by the click of a switch, that desire would disappear within seconds. Rei wondered multiple times if he had only imagined those passionate looks, and would usually believe that inner voice that told him how crazy he was for thinking that way. He would chastise himself because the truth was, he often wished those looks where directed at him.
Since that first day, Zander hadn't laid a single finger on him. The pair hadn't been alone together either. Those times when it seemed like they would be, Zander always made sure to excuse himself quickly. The action caused a sharp pain each time in the middle of Rei's chest. He hated to admit that he enjoyed his time with Zander as much as he did. He knew what Zander was looking for, and Rei wasn't certain he could live up to that standard. Zander wanted someone who was experienced and who knew what they wanted out of a relationship. Zander wanted someone he could take care of.
Rei knew he couldn't offer Zander anything at all. Rei felt broken most days, and insane every other day. There were times when Rei just wanted to curl up in bed and hide away from the world. Days when the voices of criticism and hatred, that sounded like his mother, would start to scream inside his head. Days like that were the worst. The tears were much harder to stop. He often time found himself tucked away in the bathroom, forcing himself to calm down before being able to join the household again. Often, at the end of the day, his strength would fail, and he would end the night by crying himself to sleep.
Though since he had to come to live with Zander, he realized he had only experienced one of those episodes. That first day Zander had turned away from him. Rei had seen the flash of need crossing Zander's eyes. At first, he had been afraid of what it meant, but someplace deep inside of him had silently begged for the promised touch that showed. Zander had seemed to regain control of himself quickly after, his eyes losing their heat and becoming blank slates. Rei hadn't let it affect him during the day, but that night as he lay in the unfamiliar bed, he felt the tears rolling down his temples. The reaction hadn't made any sense to Rei which only caused the tears to flow harder, his whole body soon engulfed in sobs which he tried desperately to hide in his pillow.
The most embarrassing parts of himself he refused to allow to the surface. More often than not, Rei felt like he was a child. For most his age, finding a girlfriend or going out with any friends would be high on his list of things to do. Yet Rei didn't have those desires. Instead, he wished to be surrounded by stuffed animals, or color and draw with bright pencils and crayons. When he watched TV, he found adult shows boring. Instead, the animated shows that almost guaranteed a happy ending drew Rei's attention.
Rei knew he wasn't a child and had been forced to grow up long ago. He knew how to drive though he didn't have a car, knew how to deal with finances and help a household run, having taken over those responsibilities after the first eviction warning had come. He knew how to clean and cook and provide for himself. Yet the allure of being able to forget all his worries was strong. To have someone else worry about the daily struggles of life. He knew it sounded selfish, but at the same time, it seemed almost comforting.
Lost in his own thoughts, Rei wasn't looking where he was going. Descending from the stairs, he collided with a wall. The impact brought him out of his dazed state a moment too late.
"Whoa there, Rei."