My girl had dumped me, I was so low I felt that life wasn't worth living, but Roger, unbeknown to me was to be my angel in disguise and rescue me from doing the nasty deed I already had planned, to kill myself and be done with it, that would show Melissa just how much I loved her and how she should have stuck with me, helped me with my erectile problem instead of ranting off about me being a wimp and all the rest of it.
"You should forget Melissa, you have me now," Roger whispered in that so soothing voice.
It was funny how it all happened with Roger and me. We'd been good pals for quite a time playing for our local amateur cricket team. That is when our friendship became more than just that, when we shared room together, separate beds of course then because that's how it was and I would never have ever thought any different.
But the weekend we were playing away in Leamington Spar was when it all started - and I discovered that which was really my true self and my true leaning - and I never realised it - I guess I just followed the crowd thinking that the thing for a guy to do was find himself a girl he could share a future with.
At first that all went fine with Melissa, but I didn't reckon on such a passionate and demanding woman like she, and when I couldn't deliver, no matter how she tried, I felt totally embarrassed and inapt which only made things worse. Her warm passionate kisses were nice - of course they were, and I seriously thought I was in love with her, but you know how it is with your first relationship, but sexually it was a complete failure and looking back, I guess I would have done the same thing if I had been a girl, because nearly always I have read, if you don't do it - then you don't love your girl, but with me it wasn't just a question of not doing it, more like I just couldn't raise more than a half mast for Melissa.
I remember those looks of despair, of frustration and I guess I knew the outcome when I noticed her eyeing up other guys, "real guys" she kept saying, rubbing it in.
On that first night in Leamington, I had just got the text that day from Melissa giving me the proverbial dump after I had tried and tried to win her back, even to the tune I said I would do myself in. But it was of no consequence and I literally finished in tears, with Roger there too.
He immediately comforted me, coming across to my bed in the bedroom we shared, he was in his boxer shorts which looked just like the ones I wore. I discovered later they were mine!
He sat next to me and when he put his arm around my back and gave me a hug I thought nothing of it other than he was just being a good buddy and helping me through the dilemma of losing my girl.
"Plenty more fish in the sea" he said.
"Not like Melissa" I returned blissfully.
"Well you have me, Pete"
"Yeah! But you are a guy."
"And proud of it" Roger laughed just for s minute touching himself.
I didn't have a clue of what he was on about and I wouldn't have had. We were great pals and that was the end of it. And yet, that night, feeling him climbs in beside me I felt strangely contented. Like it was the normal thing sharing a bed with your buddy.
"Pete, please forget her, you do have me" I heard him whisper. I turned around onto my back and faced him, seeing his eyes sparkle in the moonlight beaming through the window.