Three weeks before I graduated from college I was playing with myself in the shower (my favorite part of bathing) and noticed a small lump at the base of my ball sack. I hadn't noticed it before but when it started getting bigger I got concerned. It wasn't painful unless you squeezed it and it didn't move around like my nuts did.
After another week or so of denial I told my mother about it. She insisted that I go see a doctor, so I agreed but only if she did not go along. I was not going to have her in the exam room when the doctor was feeling around my nuts.
The doctor examined my scrotum, pinched the lump and made it sore, and then said it was a cyst. He told me it was probably benign but because it was growing he wanted it removed. I lived in a small town but there was a regional hospital there and a surgeon on staff agreed to do the procedure.
I decided to postpone the surgery until after exams and graduation, so six weeks passed before the surgery was scheduled. One week prior to the procedure I got a call from the doctor's office. The scheduler explained that the surgical nurse in charge would be calling me in the next day or two to explain what would happen when I got to the hospital. The nurse's name was Rick Jackson.
All of a sudden I froze and stopped listening because I recognized that name. Rick Jackson was a football star when my sister was in high school. They dated his senior year and then broke up after he went to college. But, I got to spend a lot of time around Rick because my folks would not let my sister (who was 15 at the time) go out on dates alone with a senior. He was four years older than me but one hell of a football player and all the guys in my grade wanted to be as handsome, hung, and hairy as Rick Jackson.
Rick was a gifted athlete and received a football scholarship to a small state college. He only played a couple of years and had to drop out of the program with a knee injury. He finished an associate's degree and entered nursing school after that. I knew he was a registered nurse at the hospital but I didn't know he worked in surgery.
I had seen Rick a few times around town usually riding his mountain bike or running. He was still one of the hottest guys around and in amazing physical condition. When anyone saw him out running all sweaty with his shirt off, his hairy muscled chest made them stop and stare. I wasn't sure he would remember who I was, but two days before the surgery I found out.
My cell phone rang at 8pm on Sunday night and I didn't recognize the number but answered it anyway.
"Hey Luke, this is Rick Jackson - do you remember me? I used to date your sister in high school," his voice was strong and masculine just as I remembered it.
I spoke up when I heard it was him, "Yeah Rick, Doc said you were going to call," I tried to sound cool but I had butterflies in my stomach just talking to him.
"Luke, I'm going to be in charge of your care before and during your procedure. We have three protocols that I have to complete prior to the surgery and I have a small problem", he said. All of a sudden I calmed down and was ready to listen.
"What kind of problem?" I asked.
"Well, Dr. Baker wants to do your procedure first thing on Tuesday morning and that means you would have to be at the hospital at 5:30am and go into surgery at 6:30am. There is no way in hell I can do all three protocols that he ordered in one hour," he said. Rick paused and waited for me to speak but I didn't know what to say.
"Uh, so do we need to postpone the surgery?" I asked directly.
"Well, there are two options that I can see," he continued, "One is that we move your surgery to the last one of the day which will give me plenty of time to get all the prep work done on you, but the downside is that you can't eat or drink all day which will suck for you. Plus, if there are any emergency surgeries you might get bumped to Wednesday".
"Or," he continued quickly, "Another option would be for you to come to my place tomorrow evening and we can do most of the prep work here, and then do one last thing at the hospital right before the surgery." He finished and sounded like that would be his preference but he was being careful not to influence the decision.
"Well, I can come over to your place if that works better, if you don't mind having to work at home," I said suddenly realizing I had no idea what he was going to do to me.
"Uh, by the way what kind of prep work are you talking about?" I asked, totally clueless about what he was going to do.
"Well, one of the protocols that I'm sure you already expected is shaving your pubic hair, scrotum and groin area. I assumed you knew that was going to be required?" He said it like that information should have already been explained by my family practice doctor.
"No, nobody mentioned that, but I guess it makes sense." I said weakly as the energy fell out of my voice. I had not even thought about that aspect of this surgery but damn, I did not want to have my bush and nuts all shaved, I liked having a hairy crotch, it made me feel manly and masculine. That was something that a former high school nerd like me needed.
"Yeah, it's definitely required in a procedure like this one but I shave dudes all the time, appendix, hernia, vasectomies, it's no big deal. Your bush will all grow back in a few months," he explained, as if it were routine.
I wondered what other indignities would be required and spoke up.
"Is that all that needs to be done?" I asked.