I joined a local theatre group a couple of years ago and had been involved in a couple of productions, but only a couple of walk-on parts. Last year I actually had to learn three whole lines of dialogue! So I was really excited when the director, Mitch, said he had a big part he wanted me to play in his latest production. "You're perfect for the part Steve," he said, "it could almost have been written for you."
"Thanks Mitch," I said, "What part is it?"
"Ah, that would be telling Steve dear boy," he responded. "You'll have to wait and find out with everyone else, but I promise you, you're gonna love it!"
We had a group meeting a few months ago where Mitch announced that our production this year would be one that he had written himself and there would be three performances in a local theatre. If there was any demand, we'd do more. Then he handed everyone their scripts, told us our parts, and sent us off to read through it.
I skim read through it on the way to the car park, but it was only when I got home that I read through it properly and what a shock I got when I did! My character is a middle aged married man (like me), who is seduced by a male friend and leaves his wife for her. I swallowed, wondering what to make of it. Mitch said I was perfect for the part - what made him think that?
I mean sometimes I fantasise about what it would be like to be with a guy, and yeah it makes me hard to think about it, but I'm not gay! I wasn't too bothered about playing a gay character, it's only a play and it's a big part, but wait, let me read that script through again...
And there it was. It was only one scene, but it terrified me. I was going to have to kiss one of the other guys and we'd both be shirtless. What was his name? Grant. I looked up the cast list at the front of the script to see who'd be playing Grant. It was Mitch.
Oh God, I was going to have to kiss Mitch!
I read through the scene again. My character, Ash, has gone on a road trip with his buddy Grant and they've stopped at a motel, where Grant has come on to him. Ash tries to resist, but the scene ends with a shirtless Grant saying to him, "Tell me to stop if you don't want it," before kissing him passionately while unbuttoning his shirt.
Ash stands motionless while Grant removes his shirt and caresses his chest, their lips still locked together. Then Ash breathes, "don't stop," as Grant lays him down on the bed and the lights go down as they make out.
I was getting hot just reading it, but at the same time it still terrified me. Could I do this in a theatre full of people? What would my buddies say? No, I was going to have to tell Mitch I couldn't do it.
"What do you mean you can't do it?" Mitch cried when I told him.
"I just can't. I don't think I'll be able to do that scene."
"What the hell's wrong with the scene?" he yelled.
"Nothing Mitch, it's beautifully written, but I'm not gay and I just don't think I can do it."
"I never had you down as a homophobe, Steve. That's disappointing. But if you don't do this part, how can I give you anything more than bit-parts in future? It's a play. You don't have to be gay, you just have to play a gay character. It's freakin' acting!"
"Look, okay, I'll give it a shot. Just don't expect this to go all smoothly, okay?"
Mitch put his hand on my shoulder. "Steve, I get it. You're straight. That's why you're perfect for the role. I need you to be uncomfortable. That has to come across to the audience. You'll nail it."
We began rehearsals a few months back and the big day came when we were due to act out the scene. Mitch had his shirt off, and oh my he had a nice body. Not quite a six pack, but a flat stomach and broad shoulders. His chest was covered in wiry dark hair, and a line of hair that ran down the centre of his abdomen to his navel. I had trouble keeping my eyes off him going through that scene.
