So far, I've gone through life without a care or at least that's how it's been for the first 20yrs of my life. For me, shit that others have to stress themselves over, I've blown right past with ease. It's just the way it is, the way it's always been. Being a privileged young man with well-to-do parents, life can be pretty sweet. But just like everything else, it doesn't matter how sweet things are. Seems that you're always going to finds something to bitch about.
Unfortunately, most of the time whatever you find to bitch about usually lands you in worse shit than what you were originally bitching about to begin with. I know, it can all get a bit confusing. That's how I got to the place that I'm at today. Instead of being grateful for my lot in life, I put myself in a crazy confusing place.
I'm the second oldest of four siblings. Our parents may not be in the top 1% club but trust me, they aren't that far back. My father is a tenured physics professor at a university that shall remain nameless, the same university that I attend. Now, the old man does well for himself but my mother, the one with all the money, owns her own real estate agency. So, saying that things for myself and my siblings come fairly easy is a gross understatement.
My older sister works right along side my mother. Right out of college with a degree in financing she got her real estate license and between the two of them they carry some pretty hefty bank accounts.
Now don't get me wrong, our parents do make us work. But it's usually doing bullshit jobs that in their minds, are designed to humble us and to supposedly teach us the value of hard work. But come on, really?
The summer before my senior year of high school my old man sets me up with a job on his buddy's horse ranch. My job was to ride horses all summer. To this day I still don't know what the purpose of riding those horses was for. To make sure that they were exercised? Who knows?
Now I'm sure there's a technical term for that job but I don't know it. All I know is that all summer I would arrive at the stables, get on the horse that I was assigned to for the day, then I would ride around the ranch for a few hours. Whenever I got bored, I'd swim at the lake while the horse grazed. Such a hard-humbling job. Did I forget to mention the part about banging the guys daughter? Yeah...there was that perk too.
The real reason for the job was so that I could pay for the full year of insurance on the car that my parents had bought me for my senior year. So, as you can imagine I've had a hard life. Now I know what some of you are thinking and fuck you, it's hard living my life. Ok, maybe it's not.
My current humbling job is working for my older sister. She owns an upscale apartment complex with some fairly upscale tenants. Upscale in that they can afford the crazy rent she charges them and they still have the money for all the extras. One of the extras she offers is a cleaning/errand service and that's where I come in. A struggling college student, I'm not really struggling but you get the idea.
I have three apartments that I'm assigned and from 8am till noon I'm a maid. Imagine, me, a guy that stands 5'6" all of 145lbs, shoulder length hair and a well-toned body, a maid. Yes sir, if I want to keep driving my nice little Mustang Cobra around, this is my penance for being in position of privilege.
Honestly, I don't care. It keeps my parents off of my ass and I get way more than a hot car for keeping them happy. Plus, my sister is cool as fuck, she's been my best friend all of my life so the three units I do are super easy and they tip well.
One unit in particular belongs to a military guy. I never see him and his errands always intrigue me. In fact, I can't wait to get my own place because this guy inspires me. His unit is decked out with all the bells and whistles of what I imagine my place will be once I get out of the hell hole that I'm currently living in. My parents' house.
I embellish, the struggle is real, mostly in my mind but real nonetheless. I love my parents and my siblings but damn they get on my nerves. The siblings are in their teens and in high school and they are the opposite of Mary and I, my older sister.
They can't stand each other and the fight is never ending. My parents are getting older and sometimes they scream, "what!" multiple times before the other understands what the other is saying. It's like, fucking hell! Get a hearing aid already!
Any time that I can get away from home is golden and that's what put me in my predicament. Remember what I said earlier? About bitching then winding up in worse place...I don't know if it's a worse place yet but what happened next fucked me up, literally. It has me questioning my entire existence, I mean who the fuck am I?
The real reason I love the military guys place is because he goes away for weeks at a time. So, when I want to get away from the house I go there. If I want to bang a chick, I go there. Homework, reading, ball game on the badass TV. I go there.
I have the keys to the place and my sister always knows when he's going to be gone and for how long. Honestly, I think that she's hot for the guy but according to her he's either playing hard to get or the military doesn't give him enough down time. What the fuck ever, I could care less as long as I can run away to his apartment from time to time.
Finals had just ended and GI Joe wasn't coming back Monday. It was the Friday before. I decided that I needed some alone time so I wouldn't be taking my flavor of the month with me. I love my girls but I can't seem to find the one that I want to see every day much less month after month. Know what I mean?
I checked with Mary to be sure that her toy soldier wasn't coming back early. "Look you little fucker if you get caught, you're fired! I will fire you, don't think I won't." Mary's threats were always hollow because she loved me and would never follow through. Not with me, her favorite little brother.
"Calm down, I won't mess up your boy's place. You know I always leave it spotless so stop. C'mon has ever said anything to you??" Mary just stared at me as I started with the little brother smile and con-job.
"Just make sure you don't leave any evidence, you little jerk." With her parting words I just smiled and went on my way.
Walking into the apartment I could feel the tension leaving my body. I slipped my shoes off and I put the pizza down on the table. I made my way to the fridge to put my beer away...
I had no reason to suspect anything was wrong, none whatsoever. Then as I was putting the beer in the fridge I froze. Bent over with my head in another man's fridge it suddenly felt like someone was watching me. Something was wrong, something was off.
"Who the fuck are you? And why are you in my fridge?" The sound of that voice almost made me shit myself right on the spot. A strong, deep voice booming from across the living room, I slowly started to stand up. "Slow kid, take it real slow." I wasn't about to make any sudden movements. I did just as I was told.
"Turn around kid." Hearing that voice again I made sure to move really slow. I started turning around and I wanted to cry. Whatever manhood I had went right out the fucking door without me. I wanted to cry like a little bitch.
In front of me was this big guy and I don't mean fat. I mean big, well over six feet, dripping wet and wearing only a towel around his waist. Oh, and did I mention he was pointing a pistol at me? Yeah, there was that.
He tilted his head to the side and he could see that the only thing in my hand was a six pack of beer, "Kid, who are you and why are you stealing my beer?" I was still frozen but somehow managed to speak.
"My name is David and I'm the guy that takes care of your errands and your apartment, sir." I was scared shitless; I can say that in all honesty. How can I say that? Because I know for a fact that if I had any shit inside of me, it would've been running down the side of my leg right about that moment.
