This experience happened only a couple of years ago. I was travelling to Stornoway to visit a friend and was staying the night in Ullapool. I had planned to catch the early morning ferry as a foot passenger the next day, leaving my car in Ullapool.
I had arrived quite early in the afternoon and it was a glorious day, too good to just sit in the hotel. I decided to take a walk in the hills above the town. But what to wear? The weather had caught me out completely. I had only brought heavy kilts with me as the weather up there is usually grim and, when I had packed in southern England, a week before, there had been no indication on the forecast that it would be so warm.
I was wearing my old Colquhoun tartan kilt which was one of the lightest weight ones I had with me. I had a pair of thin green trews as underwear but they were still too hot! I did consider taking off the trews and wearing just the kilt with nothing underneath but then, I thought, why not reverse it, take off the kilt and just wear my trews? But the plain green trews I had on were very short and skimpy and looked too much like underwear.
What if I wore my tartan trews? They would look like regular tartan shorts, not underwear at all. I pulled on the trews then put on my hiking boots in place of the brogues that I had been wearing. I had no short socks with me so should I wear the kilt hose up as usual, or down by the ankles? I looked in the mirror and it didnt look right with all that sock bunched up down on the ankle so I pulled them up again. They still had the red flashes and I thought that they added rather than detracted from the overall look. It felt quite sexy to be dressed this way with kilt underwear as an outer garment.
So I strode out. Quite a few glances in the hotel lobby as you can imagine but I didn't mind. There was no need to go through the village, only past a few houses, since the hotel was on the edge of the village very near the hill path.
It was steep but I managed to climb quite quickly and was soon rewarded with an excellent view across the loch. There were only a few other people on the path, one or two walking dogs, a couple on their own, and that was it. Most gave a double take at my tartan shorts but wished me Good Day as we passed. As I climbed higher there was nobody else and I thought that I had left the walkers behind.
Before I left the hotel I had had a thought -- why not have a wank out in the open air? Which is why I had taken a little tube of KY with me Here I was in a deserted area and beginning to feel sexy at the thought of what I was going to do.